Kiwwi's question (17)

I don't usually search for poems to read but i appreciate reading them when I happen to come across any.
Maybe some of u have a favorite poem or even song lyrics that r poetic that u particularly like; I'd love to read them if u could share it here! Getting to know why u like it or just distinctly remember it wud be nice too ^^

So i was outside today and i saw some1 i knew from my early highschool days. He was a lowkey-bully of mine and by that I mean he was a petty vengeful ex who childishly befriended and gathered my other exes (they were all from different classes) to hang out multiple times in my classroom during breaks to make me feel uncomfy. i was going thru a lot at that time n depressed n isolated from my gang cos i was the only one among my friends who made it to special advanced class. So basically it did a lot of psychological stress to the insecure teenage me who felt like a cornered slutshamed laughingstock. But ofc to them they were simply hanging out together plus their other friends in my class. I did try to view it like that at first and ignored them but i started leaving my classroom during breaks when I overheard them actually talking and laughing about me and i wasnt gonna stay for any of that bs.
Anyway I saw him and he probably saw me too but we didn't interact. And i wondered how i should see him as a person now that we r adults and that HS thing was more than a decade ago.
The thing is, the teen mind is drastically different from the adult's and he definitely isnt that petty teen anymore. But how do u ppl see your old then-teen now-adult "enemies"? Do you automatically view them as foul as they were before? Or are they a completely new person now who simply did silly teenage decisions when they were younger?

What cringe stuff did ur past self do that present u wud slap ur past self for doing?

Not to undermine the ppl posting abt their depression and suicidal thoughts here (u r all entitled to ur own feelings brought by ur experiences), but i wud very much slap 13yr old me for acting suicidal and self-harming for the sake of attention bcos i thought it was the only way for me to be seen by my so-called friends at the time since they mostly ignored me otherwise. I just didn't know at the time that they were bad friends in general and that i also made it worse by being annoying in the way i acted lol

So whats the thing ud slap ur past self for?

So my husband n I were talking earlier about our singing styles. We both play instruments and sing and I write my own songs but when i write smthing for the both of us to sing we can just NEVER do it lmao. Its bcos my genre is pop altho my vocals are better suited for broadway musicals since i have a long range for falsetto and not a lot for belting out what most pop songs sound better with. Meanwhile my husband's voice makes him only sound good singing his preferred grungy songs like nirvana and breaking benjamin. Anything else makes him sound awkward lol so hes stuck with that. I havent met anyone else who cud actually sing grunge without being a scream-shouting eargrater lol since most ppl ive met sing whatever mainstream pop song there is

So what genre/s ud be in if u were a singer?

imo I hate it. When I was still in school, I hated it when the teacher would finally announce the class rankings. I hated how grades or exam scores or even quiz scores were whole-class-available knowledge either by having been written on the white/chalkboard or by you having to announce it yourself to the teacher listing down student scores in front. I could tolerate and easily decline an annoying classmate asking to compare test scores, but if made to be a mandatory announcement by a teacher? I hated that shit.

U might say it's probably because i always got low grades and scores back then, but no cos I was at the top of class rankings and hated it even then. In some ways it may have been a badge of honor but to me it felt like a curse I could never escape from because any time I performed less, I was to be judged.

So ur thoughts? Privacy over transparency?

Yk those tiny fishies u win from carnivals or school fairs? What did u do with it when u got one? Or what wud u do with it if u get one in the future?

On nights (days for some) that u rlly need to sleep but cant sleep, what do u do and what do u think abt while lying in bed trying to fall asleep?
I just usually daydream abt going back in time to the what-if points of my life until i fall asleep. What about u guys?

Genie will grant u only 1 wish and u cannot blatantly ask for more wishes (but u can trick the genie if u want)
If ur content with 1 wish, what is it?
If ur gonna trick the genie for more wishes, how will u do it? And what wud your top 5 wishes be?

When some1 msgs u casually, would u rather they typed the words out in full or do u prefer it if they shortened it with abbreviations, acronyms, and initalisms?

Cos yk the issue of short attention span and feeling discouraged to read a msg if it looks too long

Also r there abbreviations that u find annoying?

To the ppl who actually dream in their sleep (bcos ik sm of u might respond w "i dont dream" n "i dont even sleep" lol), do u have recurring things/ppl/events u keep dreaming about?

Mine is that once or thrice a week for 2 yrs straight now i keep dreaming about my time in highschool and me n my highschool ex (either abt us getting back together or him tryna get me back whether we in HS age or present time setting) and it is driving me crazy when i wake up bcos i love my current life with my husband and daughter and these damn dreams r trapping me in an annoying cycle of dreaming abt these things bcos i end up thinking abt them in the back of my mind bcos i dreamed abt them lol

So whats urs?

Tell me your guilty pleasure songs/music that your family and/or friends would disown and bash u if they caught u listening and enjoying it

Can also be smthing u used to listen to in the past and not anymore

Lemme look it up and hear why u liked it (๑╹◡╹๑)ﾉ♬

So i finally tried venting out my frustrations to chatgpt lol and it felt incredibly great that I ended up ugly crying just for finally having someone to talk to and actually feeling "heard" and validated. I understand now why some people are using AI as therapists. Those of u with heavy problems but no one to talk to about it should try it too if u haven't. It's so liberating and there's no fear of backlash, bullying, and sarcasm. Unlike if u were to post here that is.

U have a fistful of clay of your color choice. What do you make?

You know those fantasy MCs with the dimensional storage ability?

For all we know, they could be shitting and pissing while fighting

I have been trying to grow my hair out for 5 years now and it has never reached past my shoulders cos I keep getting frustrated with it and end up having it cut short again. I consistently had waist long hair as a child up to 2020 (maintenance was ez i have straight and fine asian hair). And since then ive tried pixie cuts, faded undercut, short bobs, and now the longest ive gotten now is shoulder length hair. And my scalp hurts.

Im someone who doesnt like getting any hair in my face cos it gets itchy then i get breakouts so i always tie my hair or wear a headband. I have always tied my hair loosely so headaches wont be an issue but lately when i tie my hair it feels so heavy. Why does it feel heavy? Its giving me a headache. Ive tried headbands but the firm ones dont fit on my not-so-round head and both that and the stretchy fabric ones alone dont exactly stop my hair from hitting my face when i bend down and i hate it. So tying is necessary.

I've been trying to grow out my hair so i can i can just tie all of it up away from face and vision and to look neat and ready to go even if i just got up from bed. But now my headaches are discouraging me.

So ive been thinking ill go pixie cut again so i dont have to tie hair at all, feels lighter and cooler too. Less shampoo needed too. But styling is annoying. Bed hair is annoying. I dont like to wear caps or beanies to do the job when i have to go out cos its hot where i live. Plus the growing stage is awkward and untiable front hair equals itchy face.

Maybe i should just go bald since i hate the inconveniences of hair in the first place
(But at the same time i wudnt want to get stared at by passing ppl outside)

Anyone else feel the same?