Hii,, just trauma dumping here... Please don't judge if you don't like it don't read thanks. Since I don't have anywhere else to talk about this I decided to write it here...
So.. I've been raped by my brother who is 10 years older than me. It happened when I was 13 and he touched me when I was sleeping. I didn't understand it by that time what happened. And thought it was normal because I was also touch sexually by another man when I was 5. I forgot about it all but at 14 when my mom died my bro started to get closer to me giving me stuff and cheering me up I thought that it was just an accident?? but no it was not. One day I was sitting in his room and he forcefully touched me and it escalated and he went all the way. It had been going on for about 4 years and he just said it was normal and ""I love you very much"" etc etc. I couldn't tell anyone even now I'm fucking writing here haha.. I belong to a Muslim country and if I tell anyone what happened to me or what I've done they will surly put the blame on me.. that's why I can't do that. I'm now 20 and I still have to live with him. Because I don't have a home nor any parents to live with I'm all alone no money nothing.
The only thing I want is to leave him as early as possible and it is so hard to make money as a female in a Muslim country I just don't know what to do. He has told everyone that he has fucked his sister (his friends online) and it becomes very hard to bare I wish it had never happened. I hope everyday that I was never born. Terrible people exist and they do terrible things to young people.
Thank you for reading my rant I'm very happy you're here.
So.. I've been raped by my brother who is 10 years older than me. It happened when I was 13 and he touched me when I was sleeping. I didn't understand it by that time what happened. And thought it was normal because I was also touch sexually by another man when I was 5. I forgot about it all but at 14 when my mom died my bro started to get closer to me giving me stuff and cheering me up I thought that it was just an accident?? but no it was not. One day I was sitting in his room and he forcefully touched me and it escalated and he went all the way. It had been going on for about 4 years and he just said it was normal and ""I love you very much"" etc etc. I couldn't tell anyone even now I'm fucking writing here haha.. I belong to a Muslim country and if I tell anyone what happened to me or what I've done they will surly put the blame on me.. that's why I can't do that. I'm now 20 and I still have to live with him. Because I don't have a home nor any parents to live with I'm all alone no money nothing.
The only thing I want is to leave him as early as possible and it is so hard to make money as a female in a Muslim country I just don't know what to do. He has told everyone that he has fucked his sister (his friends online) and it becomes very hard to bare I wish it had never happened. I hope everyday that I was never born. Terrible people exist and they do terrible things to young people.
Thank you for reading my rant I'm very happy you're here.