I've lost weight but not in a good way

So I've been overweight all my childhood, I was picked on for it and made fun of. Elementary and middle school wasnt too good. My family as well did poke fun. But one day I had enough, I always hated my body because I was fat and ugly. I always avoided mirrors or that shows my reflection. In middle school I began my journey in late 6th to early 7th. I stared to become more active and eat better. It was going good, I lost some and was a bit happy how I looked when I graduated 8th. I still wasnt satisfied so during summer to become a 9th I exercised more and had a plan on times to eat and still exercise everyday. I believe this is where it began. I lost a good amount but I didn't see it, so I was stricter and exercised more and starved and some days binged cause I was hungry. I noticed my naked broke easily a lot an hair fell out a lot and my skin looked too pale even if I wasnt pale. In 10th I was at my lowest weight and I was unhealthy and didn't feel energized. I then tried to restrict less in order to not feel tired a lot as well as not exercising everyday. Something then occurred in my family and and with school pressure and sport unfairness had caused me to gain a bit back slowly because of the stress and sadness, guilt. When I noticed i started to hate and go back to my old way, it lasted for a bit but i wanted to start healthily and began once again. I was now losing weight more slowly and eating right and exercising. I'm feeling now happy about how I look and am finally getting stronger using weights and not only cardio. I kinda tend to want to relapse but I take it slow, i still try to exercise everyday but pass my self if I dont.