sheesh

i used to do this shit in middle school. i regret it so much.

i didn't realize how weird and disgusting it is to ship your friends, and no one even told me off. i made ship names for my friends, and even made fanfiction of them on wattpad. They Had Babies.

i forgot about it until years later and i was MORTIFIED. how could i not see that this shit was weird? no, weirder than weird. it was every synonym of horrific.

how could i romanticize kids? better yet, KIDS I KNEW. i wrote smut for my 11 YEAR OLD FRIENDS???????? WHAT?????????????? i couldn't stop loathing myself for about 2 weeks after i stumbled upon my old wattpad account.

the worst part is that everything was platonic in middle school. i just shipped people for the fun of it and made them uncomfortable by that. there was no romance, no tension, ANYWHERE. i made them feel uneasy around me because i would make fuckin fanfiction of whatever they did with another person.

i feel so bad, even now. i apologized to everyone i could think of who were affected by this. it's even weirder remembering the fics now that i'm older. i was a terrible writer and had an even worse imagination.