#1father hater

I've tried many times bit it either fails or I just end up not doing it. I either star randomly choking myself or I cut close to my wrist sometimes a little too deep to where they bleed for a while. Or I starve until I feel like my stomach is eating itself.

I'm gender fluid and my parents are extremely transphobic. And I live in a very homophobic state (and fucking trump is our president now) but I hate dressing in girly clothes. I want to be a guy or at least have a guy body so so so fucking bad. And my dad decided he was gonna start being an alcoholic and cheat on my mom before they divorced (in the state I live in they can't divorce unless they have lived in different places for a year + another year or two bc of court and shit) AND THIS MF DICK DECIDES TO TALK ABT GOD!?

I don't even believe in him but my dad doesn't accept that. But he says that I should always forgive and love everyone. Which I do. But he fucking can't be talking when he's cheating on his wife WITH TWO FUCKING WOMEN!!!!

And he acts like he's not doing anything wrong. I fucking starve myself or cut myself and he knows this. He knows he makes me want to off myself but he doesn't give a fuck. But um yeah.