Fucking Discord Drama
tldr: I'm depressed and need somewhere to spew shit at people with no word limit. also typing on phone so probably typo... if you read through all of this, you are amazing. and before someone comments this, no I don't have a life, no I don't have friends, yes I am pathetic. okay done?
Firstly, if you are actually in this server, you might remember me and you might actually know what server I'm talking about cause I'm going to get very specific here. If you are the owner, I don't give a flying fuck if you kick or ban me. Do whatever the hell you want. See. If. I. Give. A. Shit. If you think your personal data/safety is at risk cause you were goddamn dumb enough to put pictures of your toddler son in a public server listed on disboard, go rethink your life choices lmao. I don't see the cybersecurity purposes of giving a crap about it when it's already out there for pedos to see and lick. Oops... That's must've made you uncomfortable.
Ok, this stupid thing which happened over a month ago I think has been bothering me. When I say bothering, I mean I actually through stages of thinking out what happened.
So because I'm psychotic atp, I'm going to describe everything in reverse nonreverse nonsensical order.
I basically got a week muted ban from this server called something. I'm not that petty. Now, originally the things that I was accused of was posting things in the wrong channel (I accept that, I did do that), putting nsfw in sfw, making mods and people in the server uncomfortable, talking about rape in a server that bans everything to do with rape, being too nsfw in... nsfw and posting the wrong nsfw content in the wrong nsfw channel, and some other stuff that isn't important.
At first, tbh, I was actually really apologetic and felt really... really bad. Because I don't like making people feel bad like how they described it. I think I should express my imos but I don't want it to make someone feel upset or trapped or something. It's my imo, it's nothing personal. So I felt really really bad about it. The nsfw and everything else I just sort of overlapped with how bad I felt about making some people uncomfortable.
So... it was around 4-5 am when I got the message from the mod saying that I would be banned for a week and why etc etc. From FOUR- FIVE AM TO SIX AM I wrote a 2000 word apology explaining why some things happened and how I would try to resolve it. I sent it, and was planning on apologizing to the person that I remember clearly who was uncomfortable (I'll get to that later lmao), but it was 6 am I was sleepy and didn't want to make it nonsensical so I decided to deal with it the next day.
Next day, I open discord and see a message that is basically, we won't reduce the time of your muted ban. I was so confused. Nowhere in ANYTHING I wrote did I ask for that or suggest that. I wrote 2000 words for at least an hour JUST TO EXPLAIN and APOLOGIZE. If you are stupid enough to seriously think someone who goes that length to try to clear things up to that extent gives a shit about ban length - you are shallow because that's the conclusion you come to? Seriously? TWO THOUSAND WORDS OF JUST APOLOGY AND EXPLANATION. I WAS NOT BEGGING TO BE LET INTO YOUR FUCKING SERVER FOR TWO THOUSAND WORDS. THAT'S NOT HOW THAT WORKS. I FELT FUCKING BAD ABOUT THIS STUPID ASS SHIT. THAT'S WHY I WROTE IT TO CLEAR THINGS UP, YOU GERMAN HARDHEADED IDIOT.
If someone was like, 'I am really sorry and I won't do it again etc etc' sure, I would be a little suspicious. TWO THOUSAND WORDS.
(as you can see... I do not feel bad about anything in this server anymore)
But at that time, I was worried they misread what I meant and thought I was being a dick and didn't feel bad. Well, ig now I am a dick cause I don't- Anyway, I then decided to hold back replying... because it would probably make me seem worse.
But that got me thinking: EXACTLY WHAT DID I DO LMAOOO???
So the question comes, how tf did I get banned for a week. Well, in the message, it stated I got a warning twice.
??? When?
Then I thought, when? what warning? did I get a notification?
See, I thought I got banned for a week cause I broke the no say rape rule. Which is 100% on me - completely forgot it like the irresponsible discord user I am. Honestly should been banned for that (there is a small discrepancy about why I had to state the rape thing, but I shouldn't have used anything with rape in it.)
No, I got banned cause I had gotten two warnings in 24 hours. So I thought back to when one of the mods said I made someone uncomfortable. I won't... expand on why you should say: THIS IS A WARNING to someone you are giving a warning to, but they didn't.
Now to explain that and why I didn't think it was a warning I need to explain what I did. I took a snapshoot of mangago romance page x'd all the yaoi yuri explicit stuff and left all the villainess reincarnation stories. Then I said something idk what, but I ended saying that page filled with different villainess stories were trash.
Firstly, subjectively, I like reading my indulgent villainess reincarnation stories, okay? I like my tall dark uhh sometimes blond omoshiroi you are mine MLs even if they are repetitive. Objectively, those stories are crap lmaoooo. They are shit. They have the stupidest, shallowest, most ridiculous unrealistic developments good authors have nightmares of. Ok? They are bad stories objectively. Anyone who says elsewise is 4 years old and doesn't have enough brain cells to counter, problem solved. This is my post, I am the holy dictator.
Anyway so this one mod (call them... 1, they roleplay as capitano...) was like RIP to the people who like it. And me, being me, was like, yeah if you like, better get used to the fact your taste is objectively bad (as are mine lmao). I probably didn't say that word for word...? Something like that you get the meaning.
This person... started saying that it's rude to say that of what other people are like. And I was like, ok this person doesn't know the mangago culture of shitting on everything everyone likes. So I tried to explain that it's fine. Probably worded it badly ngl.
Now... in reading this, you should realize, I can really type a lot. So I wrote... a lot. And this person replied. Now the thing is their only point was 'it's rude' and I basically explained why no, it really isn't. This goes back and forth a bit and then the owner/mod sends the message that this person is clearly uncomfortable etc etc drop the topic.
1. WELL I'M SORRY I'M NOT A GODDAMN MIND READER THEY DIDN'T FUCKING SAY THAT THEY WERE UNCOMFORTABLE. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? READ THEIR BRAINS WAVES??? YEAH I'M SORRY YOU FELT UNCOMFORTABLE ENOUGH TO NEED TO WHINE TO ANOTHER MOD TO GET THE FUCKING BALLS TO TELL ME I MADE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE. WHAT ARE YOU? FOUR? NEED MOMMY TO HOLD YOUR FUCKING HAND TOO? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THE SERIES. NEXT TIME, GET THAT ADULT PARENTING SHITTY ACT UP AND TELL IT TO MY GODDAMN FACE INSTEAD OF BEING LIKE 'humuhumu senpai I'm scwared they made me sniff uncomfwortwable~' TO GET ME A WARNING LMAO.
2. THE FUCK ARE THEY UNCOMFORTABLE ABOUT? IT'S A FUCKING MANGAGO PAGE OF THE MOST REPETITIVE SHIT THERE IS. 1 DOESN'T EVEN GODDAMN USE MANGAGO (i think). LIKE HOLY SHIT YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE SOMEONE SAID SOME SHOW SUCKED EVEN THOUGH YOU NEVER WATCHED OR READ IT LMAOOO HOW NICE OF YOU TO THINK OF THOSE POOR READERS WHO ARE NOW CRYING THEIR BEDS SOME RANDOM LOSER (me) ON THE INTERNET THINKS THEIR TASTE SUCKS SO SAD BOOHOO. YOU KNOW WHAT? 1'S FUCKING OPINION THAT MY OPINION MAKES THEM UNCOMFORTABLE MAKES ME UNCOMFORTABLE CAUSE I'VE NEVER SEEN SUCH HYPOCRISY IN MY LIFE LMAOOO. ONLY A FUCKING AMERICAN WHO POSTS PICTURES OF THEIR GODDAMN KID ON A PUBLIC DISCORD SERVER IS HYPOCRITICAL ENOUGH TO FEEL PROXY UNCOMFORTABLE WHEN THEIR ONLY VALID THOUGHT IS THAT IT'S RUDE TO SAY SHIT IS SHIT. DO THEY KNOW HOW MUCH GODDAMN PISSWATER GETS TURNED INTO ANIME CAUSE OF THIS MENTALITY? HATERS BE HATERS, BUT SOMETHING'S GOT TO HAVE A REASON TO BE HATED TO BE HATED DUMBASS. PEOPLE LIKE 1 ARE THE REASON WHY SHITTY ANIME GET HIGH RATINGS EVEN THOUGH ALL THEY ARE SAYING IS EITHER REPETITIVE SHIT OR STRAIGHT UP JUST BULLSHIT THAT ANYONE WHO ISN'T A FUCKING INCEL KNOWS.
yeah.
ok.
Anyway, so that was my 'warning' that wasn't really a warning because I didn't know because idk what part of me saying something you've never read before as being trash makes you (1) uncomfortable.
And I thought of it. And when I did, I was like, what the fuck.
And then I started to think more on exactly what I did and what this server was like.
So what about that second warning I claim to be aware of?
Well, I was talking to someone on another channel about character design in BL and made a meme about in that manga where the seme is like 3x the size of the uke (The Abyss?). Course, uke sleeves etc etc. I will have an entire separate thing on how stupid nsfw protection works but this person was like the words uke and seme are nsfw. Now, I am over the underage limit, so I could have gotten a nsfw role BEFORE.
but tbh, nsfw to me meant straight up cock in asshole pics. Everything else is fair game. idrc how messed up that perspective is. But to respect this person's uh boundaries ig I asked for an nsfw role.
LET ME REITERATE: I asked for a fucking nsfw role to talk about character designs in yaoi. Not dick design, we're not reading pianpian, CHARACTER DESIGN.
Anyway, so this came from a meme so I was like, no rant section, then I'll shove it all in memes. So I did.
Now, I already deleted what I wrote, but I first posted the meme, then I went into explaining BL character designs. I used Slow Damage and something else as an example. Now, Slow Damage has rape in it. I thought, you know what, I'd be a decent person and put a warning about it in case someone decides to play and ignores the warnings only to get a face full of Madarame beating the living shit out of Towa and then fucking him with moaning audio to accompany it.
And that - I am not kidding - is why I mentioned rape at all. For a warning. I think I even spoilered it. I think.
Anyway, that's not why I'm pissed, I could have tried to find an example without rape in it. No, the reason why I'm pissed is because if you bothered to read anything I fucking wrote, it was entirely about character design.
AS IN, I DIDN'T WRITE FUCKING PORN. NOR DID I MAKE REFERENCES TO HENTAI. HOW DARE YOU FUCKING CALL SLOW DAMAGE PORN OR HENTAI. THE FUCKING WRIOTHESLEY BODY PILLOWS YOU ALL BOUGHT WERE MORE DEGENERATE THAN SLOW DAMAGE. HOW DARE YOU, YOU HENTAI OBSESSED PORN ADDICTS THAT CAN'T READ. YOU CAN'T EVEN READ. THAT'S SAD IN A ROLEPLAY SERVER.
LIKE WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'what the fuck did I just read?' DID YOU READ? ARE YOU BLIND? I DON'T EVEN WATCH THE GODDAMN SEX SCENES IN SLOW DAMAGE LMAO IMMEDIATELY TALKING ABOUT PORN MY ASS. I DON'T TALK PORN - I DON'T EVEN READ OR WATCH IT UNLIKE YOU SHITS WHO SHARE PANTALONE AND DOTTORE FANART OF THEM TIED UP AND FUCKING LMAOOO IF YOU BOTHERED TO READ ANYTHING, USE TWO BRAINCELLS AND COMPREHEND SHIT YOU WOULD HAVE REALIZED THAT I NEVER MADE A SINGLE SERIOUS REFERENCE TO FUCKING BUT JUST TO CHARACTER DESIGN.
ALSO, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN TOO NSFW??? IT'S A FUCKING NSFW CHANNEL. YOU GUYS WERE BUYING WRIOTHESLEY BODY PILLOWS WHERE HIS FACE LOOKS LIKE HIS ASS WAS JUST FILLED WITH FUCKING NEUVI ALPHA DRAGON DOUBLE DICK CUM. TOO NSFW - FUCKING READ IN A ROLEPLAY SERVER. YOU GUYS ARE WAYYYYYYYY MORE PORN OBSESSED THAN ME WHO FAST FORWARDED THE SEX SCENES IN HASHIHIME, OOE, UUULTRAC CAUSE I'M TOO EMBARRASSED TO HEAR THEM MOAN. YOU ALL PROBABLY HAVE ONLY FANS TO WATCH COSPLAYERS FUCK LMAOOOO. (is that what only fans is for? or was that just pornhub?)
... ₍˄·༝·˄*₎◞
So yeah. I don't know why they were basically accusing me of what was basically indecency in an nsfw channel for a message about character design. Now, I probably did make like two sex jokes but like, come on, wriothesley fucking face orgasm body pillow.
ok so those were the two warnings.
now, because this is the limit for how petty I am, I am going to trash on their server in the most unharmful way by screaming into the void of mangago's forums. This is just me being petty rn so like, if you reached this far lmao idk.
see, I could have raided their server, invited bots, made their life miserable, but I didn't cause I'm not a piece of genuine shit. I just need to release all the shit somewhere. I could have left them a shitty review. But I didn't wanna know why? cause some people like it there, I don't see why I should ruin it for them.
So...
1. The Capitano Roleplayer 1
Now having expanded on 1, let's talk more about them because I've been meaning to shit on them for some time. As you may have realized 1 has a kid. 1 also likes to post pictures of their kid on a discord server. I don't really need to explain why that's a really fucking bad idea and why it's dangerous and the fact that kids who get their images posted on the internet are sometimes kidnapped using the information from said photographs. But they do it. And whenever they do it, I wish their kid had a better parent. Now this really doesn't matter, it's just me being nitpicky, some people might say it's okay (you're stupid and that's another fact).
2. Our Pantalone and Dottore Roleplayers (9 and 2)
These two... hahaha... these two liked to roleplay very randomly these tidbits of pantalonexdottore relationships like, cheesy stuff. In the middle... of a conversation. Now, tbh, I don't really care, but I found something interesting.
They said if it made you uncomfortable that they were basically flirting every day, to tell them that.
Now, why do I think this is funny, because no one is ever going to tell them that even if they are uncomfortable.
Why? Pressure.
Think about it this way, two people are having fun and you, a stranger come in. They tell you they are welcoming and are okay, but they sometimes randomly start flirting as characters in another series. Now you as a new person, if you are uncomfortable, are you going to tell them? No. Because you just joined this group, you aren't going to make yourself remembered as that one cockblocker.
Well, you might say that's new whatevers, what about old ones? Well old members are already used to this shit.
It's hypocritical (idk if that's the right word), to say, oh yes tell me when you are uncomfortable, but also make an environment for the user, where everyone else accepts it and they are forced to speak out about it. It's why roles for triggers or gender or pings etc etc can help because you are ensuring a degree of freedom if lack of identity. No one wants to be a black sheep, that's basic psychology I think.
This type of 'welcoming' environment is really popular now. See, we can do this and tell you to tell us if it makes you uncomfortable. We're fair and understanding. You can tell us. But then explain to me why when I said something to 1 that made them uncomfortable they could go to you and get me a warning?
If why this is hypocritical doesn't make sense, basically what is going on is the question of who has the burden of convenience? If you are going to do something that might make someone uncomfortable, is it the person who is uncomfortable who needs to say so, or is it the person who is making them uncomfortable who needs to check in?
In my case, because 1 never explicitly said they were uncomfortable and I needed to see how 'clearly' they were uncomfortable, it's the second case. I am the one who is making them uncomfortable, I am the one who needs to realize and stop.
In their case, it's the people who are subjected to them flirting who need to say so. They don't need to care if someone doesn't want to ruin the mood or is awkward, they gave the chance. And tbh, that's fine.
The problem is then why when it comes to my situation do I get a fucking warning?
Say it to my face too. I don't mind, I'll stop everything if you tell me to. Just like them, just tell me.
And this is the double standard in this server, which is common to many servers.
3. NSFW.
Don't show NSFW to kids, right? Eighteen or nothing. I cannot begin to explain how stupid abd evasive this argument is.
Someone in this server was near discord TOS age (13), they sent suggestive images of a woman giving birth to the Earth. Does this person really need an NSFW racket? no. they've seen it all.
This is a thin line, yes but I don't see a point in protecting someone from something they've already been so heavily exposed to. If the conversation allows it and it's nothing bad literally just a girl in a maid outfit with big boobs, it's not nsfw.
Also, if you can allow 'creams his pants' you can allow my azur lane maid girls.
Now, tbh, the people in this server weren't bad people. I just am pissed at them. Except 1 and 2. I'm sorry, this sort of hypocritical attempt to moderate a server is just straight up mixing mud and chocolate until you can't tell what is what because of how disgustingly tricky you are being. It's pathetic and the fact that 2 thought I was trying to lessen the mute period of my ban proves they are a 小人.
Ok anyway, so I'm done it's 3 am, I've been texting for two hours...I feel better. there are honestly more things but I'm ok and tired lmaoooo (づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ ok time to go back to simping on schedule.