i don’t know how to feel.. (¬_¬)

for some background; this guy & i have known each for years, we both have admit our feelings way back but never have we never became a thing. we would ghost each other then come right back.

recently he came back & me being the dumbest person who can’t place boundaries responded after telling everyone i was over him. which in a way i was but i held care for him as a person always.

he’s in the military, he’s been sending me letters for weeks now and never fails to mention how he wants to make things right & how be wants to see me.

he texted me a couple hours ago, talking about how he’s coming back for christmas & mentioned how this friend of his could hook him up a MOTEL for him & i. he said we could exchange gifts & all we wanted to do.

my gut sank & i have no idea if im overthinking it or not. i felt a bit disappointed & disrespected in a way— i have no idea if thats all he has in mind… he’s changed a lot & i have no idea what he’s like in person anymore.

i haven’t gotten opinions from friends because im scared of their judgement. i dont mind anonymous opinions though :( pls let me know if its just me overthinking it.