Honestly do I just stop giving a fuck?

My situation is similar to someone here and I cares too much abt friends, I'm willing to do shit for them and even forgive them after alot times of being shit to me. However as far as I know I've been shit to them like few times.

1 was me being upset at them for wanting my own decisions abt my relationship. 2. Same shit again but I opened up on how I didn't like it 3. For like not liking myself after making mistakes on them?? 4. I'm defending my own friend?? Sorry I chose to fucking hear their side and understand them

That's what I fucking know and I DMed MULTIPLE times if I upset them and say sorry and thank you for their patience but their damn reply is "it's fine you didn't do anything wrong" but I'm still fucking here feeling guilty cus i just cared. I've been ruining myself just to "make it up" to them but all they care abt the wrongs. Idk what I'm doing to myself atp cus I just wanted to be seen as someone who ACTUALLY cares.