Durability

I love feeling hurt
I love feeling pain
I love feeling like the ‘bad guy’
I love how my thoughts can never be silenced
I love how my life is like Prince Zuko
He’s always angry
No matter what he does it’s never enough
He’s so angry at the world
Because he can’t understand why he’s angry at himself
I can’t understand why I’m so angry at the world
I can’t comprehend why I’m so angry at myself
This year is about focusing on myself and what I can do to ‘change’
I don’t like it when I’m angry
I don’t know how to change
I don’t know how to get rid of this anger
Singing isn’t helping anymore
I’ve become restless because I can’t figure out how to appease this monster that’s been growing like a tumor.
I am the tumor
I am the disease
I am the monster I’ve made myself to be
I want to scream
But I’m drowning under water.