19 years old and no friends

9090 9090 2024-07-12 01:22:51 About having friends
im a 19yo and have no friends!

for some reason, i cant maintain a friendship with anyone!

i dont know if there is something wrong about me >> i always try to be someone im really not so i can make people happy, like suppressing my special interests, trying not to be "weird", changing my style and everything, but i cant keep anyone by my side

i think it can be also about the way i look (im fat and ugly), but there are people similar to me in looks who also have friends, so i have no idea about what im doing wrong anymore

i just gave up and i am not trying to have friends no more for now, its fine to be alone

Messages

Oimatchi July 12, 2024 10:34 am

Man same although I'm not fat but maybe ugly? Man I know how you feel and it's ok to be alone'-_-

asscandy July 12, 2024 3:24 am

Same, I have ran through 2 friendships mainly because I barely text them and I’m really bad a maintaining a conversation.

I’m learning as I go tho but it really sucks but I try to normal and try not be seen a weirdo or anything. The only friend I got is my sis which I’m grateful for but it’s also kinda sad. Idk if I’ll have actual friends in the future but it’s whatever I guess.

But you still have a whole future in front of you so there’s still a chance that you’ll have a friend! Just don’t get discouraged and try your best and you’ll eventually meet the person you’ll call your best friend!

Irene_01 September 19, 2024 12:53 am

I used to be like that until I met my best friend. She tells me how she wishes she can be with me all the time. That kind of energy helped me talk and express myself more

Sunflower999 July 12, 2024 2:32 am

As someone who also don't have many friends; what i learned from my mistakes is there is always gonna be people who will accept you with your true personality and finding them might take your time. On the other Side there is also gonna be " surface relationships" which will fulfill your need of socializing as a human being with those people ( they could be collegues, neighbors, co-workers even family members) your relationships doesn't need to be complex. And we need both kind of relationships. throughout my adolescense i mixed them up, in my head there was no logical reasons behind getting a surface relationship but in long term ı pushed myself out of my community and when i actually started to realise that my close friends were so differente than me, ı felt really bad and cut connection with them, so ı left alone
That was the key element of my lonelines for a long time, maybe you could find something from yourself here. Btw ı'm 18 and if you want to, we could talk. lastly,SO SORRY FOR MY POOR ENGLİSH, İT' S NOT MY NATİVE LANGUAGE T-T

Lucky2607 July 12, 2024 1:56 am

Hello! I saw your post and felt that I needed to tell you something! I am a 27 years old that have a lot of “friends” and I didn’t had any friends until I was 18~19 yo.

I was really a gloomy person before and really hated myself, I only spoke about sad things that i suffered at the time with my family and my energy was really low… i am speaking about low and high frequency that we share as a human being. No one wanted to be with me simple because deep inside i didn’t want to be close to anyone.

But everything started to change when i started to love myself and accepted who I was.
But of course I still have a lot of things that I am working on… but little by little I am changing everything that doesn’t make me feel like myself.

Humans have different kinds and levels of friendships and that’s why it’s really hard to find a real friendship in our modern environment today.
There’s a lot of fake friendship for example
Having a lot of “friends” that don’t ask how are you doing or how was your day can be considered “worse” than having no friends at all…

Sometimes having only one real friend is 100x better than having a lot of those fake “friends”

I cannot explain properly because each person is different.
But a really important thing that I can tell you is that:
It’s normal to be different and it’s normal to be yourself.
When you feel like that the real friends is gonna be with you. Focus on yourself first, enjoy the things that you like with the most joy because people are gonna feel attacked by your high vibrations! Love yourself first always so when you are full of love then you can share with other people!

mimicore July 12, 2024 1:53 am

i know we don’t know each other, but if you’d like to talk, i am here for you. i’m 22 and i love to be alone personally but i struggled a lot with loneliness in my teens and had no friends pretty much all throughout high school. nowadays i have friends who share my special interests etc and a wonderful partner that always indulges in things for me. it’ll happen for you too <3

Isekai junkie July 12, 2024 1:44 am

At the end of the day it’s your choice but I don’t think you should give up. I struggled a lot with friends growing up. I was fat and dark skinned in a school with skinny white fork and their racism and fat phobia prevented me from making friends. But one good friend is all it take to see your worth. Don’t change yourself at all. Eventually even if it takes a long while, you’ll meet that one friend that genuinely wants to be there for you. You can choose to be alone for as long as you want but at some point someone will coke and it’ll be your choice to accept them or push them away. Good luck

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