Hopeless...........

All my friends found new ones and slowly forgets me. I also made new friends though and I am happy to have friends like them because we have so much in common like reading manga and manhwa and watching anime. But, there are two things that I didn't like it in school year 2023-2024. One is that all my expectations were kind of being ruined? I don't know how to explain it..... I am actually a student in a star section (like, the highest section among the school grade or Section 1) and I never expect that because I'm not even an honor student. For the entire school year, I didn't enjoy my life there (except with my new friends). Let's say that they are in the higher level while I'm still in the mid level. Two is that I am disappointed to myself for not doing well with my academics. I once tried to fix it but it didn't end well. Hopefully, I will have an enjoyable school life this coming back to school. I also want to do well with my academics.

Edit: I am also having a hard time what course I will choose once I get in college. I only have like, 2 or 3 years(?) before I get to college. I don't even know what to do once I graduated in college. All those school-related memes I found in internet, I always laugh at them. Now that I thought of it really deep, I'm like, having a hard time. I don't see a nice future for myself. I wanted to have a job with a high salary but I don't think with my poor skills, I can reach that. It's really hard once you are near on entering the adult life. Even though I'm still 6 years away before turning 21 years old, I'm not sure if I can do well. I have low self-esteem after all. But there are times I get confident for myself. All I can say is that I'm still undecided until now and I feel like I'm running out of time which made me overthink about what will happen to me in the future.