Freedom
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Yeah, I'm single, I do my things alone, I decide alone, I choose everything I want, And the perks of it, I love the freedom from being concern or considering other's thoughts or whatsoever 'cause when it comes to myself all i think is me. Love yourself, Pamper yourself coz nowadays, no one can possibly do that (even your parents will restrict you to some things) haha
Messages
I'm a loner, can't say that i'm a exacly a loner since i'm not that introvert i have friends at home, but at school i'm always alone:< , senior highschool life for me is fuck up everybody is so fucking mean and i'm starting to think that maybe it's me even though i never done anything for them to act like that to me all i want is a cool, amzing and a happy senior high school life like those kdrama i watch but its really different! I'm an academic achiver but what's happening right now it's fucking affecting affecting my performance! i hate it, i used to be able to recite without thinking anyones opinion whether my answers gonna be right or wrong instead i think of atleast i tried, but now???? it's so fuck up i cant even recite well, no i don't recite at all anymore because i'm so scared of their judgement! my quizes? i use to top it all back then and whenever i got low score me and my friends will just laught it off, but now? all my quizzes are fucking low and when i see the result i will just think like damn i could've ace it if i study harder, but i cant even focus when im studying its so hard i'm losing interest in studying i just want a friend i just want to have a circle of friends i wish my junior high school friends are still my classmte! I missed them so much. All of this is so fucking draining it's sooo hard thats its affecting my mental health, i wasn't like this back then, what happened to me:<! This is not all but all i know is that theres a lot more i wanted to say but i cant find words that described this dumb feelings!
Hi dear, you should start changing yourself. Based on your story, your foundation seem starting to crumble. You should be worry of how you think bout yourself.
You know, nowadays, toxic and mean people are very common traits... its actually everywhere youngers, teens and even olders. You can't runaway from that so you should learn how to handle it . I mean its also a skill to handle those kind of people.
My advice for you,
1. Build your Foundation Stronger
from your mindset, to your knowledge, skills and talent, to your physical appearance and then achievements that been recognized ( certificates / competition /awards). Once you start doing/trying to achieve this' self-esteem and confidence will developed into you.
Acquiring this will become a subject for inspiration and also insecurities. You should learn how to defend yourself thru words and physical.
2. Love yourself (awareness of your state of mind, health and also wealth ) Satisfying and Improving yourself were also part of it.
3. Always think yourself, if your in or out of the situation, topic, concern or whatever.
If your in, Think how you can make negative situation to positive, how your loss be your gain, how to make disadvantage situation to be .
advantage. In short, Always be Positive but it doesnt mean you wont consider the negatives.
If your out, just be silence and ignore it or listen to it, its also good subject for reflection for you haha.
And dear, Friends are Friends as you grow older Friends will become your network, you can make it bad or good network but still you cant trust it but you surely need it. once you enter college, its all about connection and building it, you really need to learn alot.
Whom you can trust were your circle of bestfriends , so build your bestfriend connection stronger.