Before the New year

It was right before the new year (2020) , I mean to be completely honest I'm not sure if it would have killed me but I basically just downed a whole bottle of extra-strength Tylenol ( I think it was like 600 or 500mg , not a hundred percent sure ) I basically decided on trying to off myself that night because everything was basically really shitty then and no matter what I did it just continued to get worse and so I was like fuck it and took the whole bottle I had for the occasion . I mean I'm glad I didn't do it because after a while I started getting all tired and that , so I just was chilling in bed feeling sick getting ready to throw up but then my mom came in and had apologized for something that happened that day that got me really "messed up" I guess to say and even then It had been a while since I had already downed the bottle and I was feeling sick as shit because even the taste of the pills were still in my mouth and it was disgusting but after a while of thinking of things I've always wanted to do I was like fuck it , I shouldn't try dying I've got multiple things I wanna do for doing that so yeah , I went to the bathroom and tried to make myself throw it all up but it was to late I guess ? because only two came back up and then after that I went to sleep and then woke up and lived life . I felt disgusting after waking up tho . also then next day My mom had told me that one of her friends had died from ODing so I guess it sort of was a sign that it was a good thing that I didn't do it ???