SO IM BEING VILLAINIZED AND I NEED HELP
There's this junior guy I've known for about 5-6 months and he proposed to me a few days ago but I rejected it and now people are villainizing cuz I rejected a "good" guy. Well, he is a good guy no doubt but I absolutely hate it when people force themselves into someone's else's life or personal space. He would wait for me every day in front of my campus and would almost always be there whenever I'm hanging out with my friends and he would magically appear out of nowhere whenever I'm alone or in trouble. He is a good guy no doubt cuz his behaviour is really nice, he's friendly with everyone, he's kind and polite and has a good sense of humour. He brings me home-cooked meals and snacks often and accompanies me to my hostel. But guess what I didn't ask for all this and as a woman living in a country where we are constantly stalked, poisoned and brutally raped at nighttime, I can't help but be wary. He's way too nosy about what I'm doing or what I'm feeling, he's always around and I find it really suffocating cuz even my friends support his behaviour and would leave us alone. Even my gals arent this "caring". So during the time before the proposal, he was being overly nosy and clingy and "caring" and whatnot and I was at my limit. So when he proposed I straight up declined it. The tone I spoke in was kind of rude and pissy. and now everyone is mad at me cuz he's always been so kind. they're saying stuff like I'm gonna regret it later, that I'm on my high horse and I'm a bitch. and now I'm actually thinking will I really regret this later. Now I'm feeling really bad for being rude. what should I do? should I talk to him or should I clarify stuff to my friends? I'm stressed and I don't feel like going out anymore. I don't wanna see anybody now.
you shouldn't feel bad. you're not obliged to respond to accept anyone's feelings if you don't feel the same way. explain to your friends how you don't feel the same way about him and maybe try telling the guy in a nicer way that you also don't feel the same way?
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08 07,2021