Here's my two cents about rape in yaoi

I think what most people are upset about (me at least) is when rape leads to romance, and people support it because "it's fiction" and "there's always bad stuff happening in the world and you don't get upset about that in literature." Yes, there's murder and hate in the world, and rape is a part of the bad stuff too. Those kinds of additions to a story make the stakes rise and the mood darker, and I'm all for an author utilizing those topics to give their story weight. And yes, that includes rape. This is because it's interesting to see the effects murder, hate, and rape would have on different people and how it would affect their lives afterwards. I'm not for the author condoning bad events like these, because they're not good things. It's a tragedy when they happen, and it leads to some very understandable and interesting character development. Like how the murder of his parents causes Bruce Wayne to develop a strong sense of justice with a disdain for killing. It's an extremely painful and emotional event, and it changes a person permanently.

Rape in yaoi is not often taken seriously in that sense. Most rape scenes in yaoi happen between the main couple before they develop feelings for each other. It almost never affects either party in the sense of their relationship, and it doesn't change anything. There's no point to it other than to get the main couple interacting and bait the readers in with a sex scene right off the bat. Take Junjou Romantica, one of the most famous yaois, for instance. Misaki is forcefully jerked off by Usagi the second time he meets him, and immediately afterwards, they have a normal conversation about Misaki applying to college. The event barely phases Misaki, he doesn't even really acknowledge it in the future, and he goes right on to develop feelings for him almost immediately after. His rape is not a traumatic, character turning moment; his rape is a placeholder for the couple making love because they're not in love yet. Rape is never given serious consideration in yaoi, at least not when it happens between the main couple. It's just ignored so the author can move on to the more juicy stuff. *Who cares about consent when it's hot, right? Rape victim characteristics are boring, and the uke should just get over it because he didn't get hurt, right?*
But when it happens to the uke from an outsider, then everyone's getting on his/her case and damning them to hell. Double standard much?

* = sarcasm, for those who want to quote me out of context.

There's a difference between "this is a good couple, they're so perfect together" and "this dynamic is hot and it gets me off." And yeah, you're all going to say "It's just fiction, what's wrong with that?" or "It was just once, see look it's alright now." Well, that's because the condonation of abuse markers and literal rape in the literature you read is disturbing, to say the least. Saying that "rape is a bad thing, but because it's happening on paper and not IRL it's okay" is pretty hypocritical. You're still showing your support for it. You're still cheering the couple on. You're not hoping for the uke to get out of an abusive relationship, you're waiting for him to get over it so they can get it on. You're telling these authors that you'll still read their stories about gay relationships even if every single one of them starts with rape, and you're telling rape victims IRL that this stuff is hot because it's not real.
Condoning rape isn't something I'll ever agree with. If you hate me because you disagree, I'm fine with that.

That's all, thanks for reading :)