Do homosexuals, bisexuals etc. get jealous of their significant other's physical attributes?
Hi there! my name is Ami :> I'm a bisexual girl, 18.
I came to this forum in hopes of being able to get answers involving the recent issue I have about my sexuality.
All answers are welcome! Feel free to share your personal experiences too! Thank you so much!
Being a bisexual, I'm attracted to both men and women. However, I have found that I only get attracted to a woman if they display "traditionally masculine" qualities. For example, my bisexual awakenings are from male characters such as He Tian from 19 days and Craig and Kenny from South Park being genderbended into girls.
It's really interesting because I didn't really feel anything towards He Tian nor Craig when I was observing them as boys. When observing them genderbended as girls though, I felt REALLY attracted to them! And I BADLY wanted their female versions to be my girlfriends! ( Kenny on the other hand, I was attracted to him even before I saw him genderbended hehe~ )
I have a type. It involves long-haired tall girls who, if not stoic and emotionless, ( like Craig ) are very flirtatious. ( like He Tian and Kenny )
I did some introspection and I found that the reason why I'm only attracted to females who display traditionally masculine qualities is because I'm very insecure of my own femininity. I find it difficult to be in a relationship with a traditionally feminine woman because her femininity makes me compete with her. ( Even if I try to stop this behavior, I really can't help it! ) I tend to compare myself a lot to others and have very low self-esteem to which I always doubt and second-guess my abilities. I have friends but I'm also really shy in real life and mask my true identity in fear of being shunned. ( I only befriend those who I know will understand me, like the quiet artsy kids that sit beside the window in class thinking their anime protagonists lol ) I think what I find really attractive about the girls I have mentioned is that they're all very confident and they don't care about what others think of them, the complete opposite of myself. ( for visualization, I kin Tweek Tweak 1000 percent! ) Additionally, they're all girls. Girls, traditionally, are expected to be very soft, sweet, gentle, cute etc. They, on the other hand, despite all being girls, are very uhmm how do I explain it
, for lack of a better term, big d**k energy lol. I love!!! that they give a middle finger to gender roles and gender stereotypes. They aren't soft cutesy waifu make sandwich for husband uwu LIKE WHAT SOCIETY TELLS WOMEN TO BE! They are just UNAPOLOGETICALLY THEMSELVES. And I LOVE them for it!
My predicament is that I don't know if I'm truly bisexual :(
because despite having reasoning as to why I'm attracted to those type of people, physically-wise, they're also very masculine-appearing: tall and, again, for lack of a better term, not particularly gifted in the mommy milkers category ( haha ) like me. ( except for fem He Tian, she has big b**bs in fanarts )
I've always been self-conscious of my chest. They're not small per se, however, I don't think they're enough to satisfy a romantic partner. Therefore, due to insecurities I have about my chest, having a big-chested significant other really makes me jealous.
Sheeesh..all my issues stem from my inferiority complex
Please help me figure out if I still classify as a bisexual
Thank you so much!