To be or Not to Be-- That is the Question
Hm. I LOVE being single and have really lived the life thinking that I would happily keep being single for the rest of my life. I took great joy and relief in being single. And then shortly before I turned 31, I met someone. And despite myself, I fell in love with her. Then I was suddenly placed into a position where I had to choose between my two loves: being single or being with her.
I HATED making that decision. No matter what I chose in the moment, I'd be left with a twinge in my chest for that choice. If I chose to be single, I hurt. If I chose to be with her, I hurt. In the end...I chose her. Of course, I was rather upset, frustrated, and cranky about not being single anymore.
It's been year and a half since then. She's really supportive and works hard to understand, so she gives me my space when I need it. And she never ever makes me guilty for telling her to leave me alone for a while. She never takes it personally. She's the one who made my choice to ditch single-dom a worthy sacrifice.
So, really, this whole choice to be single or not may just be about finding the person who fits the best with you. Do your thing. Do what you want. And the rest will follow as a result of doing what you truly want. Single or not, do what makes you happy.
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You two are so cool~
I'm actually really grateful I got to read this because I've been single for most of my life and, even though I feel really alone sometimes, the idea of losing my independence and entering a relationship scares me to death. I've let down a couple of guys (one of them I really, really liked) in the last few years for that reason alone, and pushed away or turned down any advances since.
I was kinda having an existential crisis thinking that I'm getting old (25 in a month) and that I'll end up forever alone and without a single real relationship to speak of, so it gives me hope knowing that there's the chance I could someday find someone who would let me have both my freedom and someone to love.
You make me smile(ノ≧∇≦)ノ