Current/Past Phobias

First off, I was absolutely TERRIFIED of balloons before. Not sure why, though. Every time I saw one, my hands would automatically come to my ears. Plus, I'd be running away so fast that I had almost bumped into anything/anyone that got in my way. When I saw people playing with balloons, I got so shaky. The fact that their hands were touching, pushing, and pulling it made me want to scream "NoOOoOo." Why? That loud popping sound right after the balloon explodes was what I hated the most. I had always thought it was going to burst, so I just stared at it and sweat. If the balloon did pop, I would've shrieked and quietly sobbed. My friends were really puzzled, asking me a bunch of questions on why I was so scared. Immediately they shrugged it off and realized that I had to stay away from those things at parties and other events. I was incredibly sensitive when it came to noise back then. Not to mention, I've been hearing loads of things in my ear since I was little (e.g., buzzing, beeping, snow crumbling, wind, etc...). Nnn it really frightened me. I wanted to tell my parents, but I was too afraid that they were going to get too worried and send me to some ear doctor. Since I was little at this time, I was thinking, "Wait, what if I have ... EaR SuRGERY?!?!?! qAq HeCC NO to tHE nono." Yeah, so I haven't told them until a few years later. We're planning on going to the ear doctor soon to check if my hearing's ok. I've also noticed I might have tinnitus, but like anyways that's beside the point.

Let's talk about the 'phobias' I have now (I mean, I wouldn't really call them my phobias since they don't really scare me so much. Oh well, I'm putting it in anyways). Death and losing loved ones. Obviously, these are really common fears for people. Imagine being in high school, suddenly realizing you were just a baby a while ago. Just the other day, you were laughing at how goofy your dad was being. Then there was the time when you went to rollerkingdom with your childhood friends, who suddenly disappeared without saying "goodbye." How time flies so quickly is really depressing. You're, for example, 20 now. Isn't it bizarre? Your 20 years already passed. The next thing you know it, you're going to be 40, then 70, then probably 90. Your birthday comes along, that's one year closer to death. Have you ever wondered, what death would be like? Some people say you would go to heaven or hell. Some people say reincarnation. What would happen if everything ended? The earth, the sun, the galaxies ..You know what I mean. Some people say heaven's in the sky/clouds, but what if that ended too? Where would we go? I don't want to sound dumb so I'm not going to say too much lol. Anyways, yeah sorry if this all sounded boring. Thanks for reading anyways, haha. Here, have a brofist.
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