ripping a fat one
It was 5th grade, reading time. I could feel it churning in my stomach. The feeling bubbled up, getting bigger and bigger. I knew it was almost time. The ice cream and the cup of milk i had that morning was not helping in this situation, and i needed a plan, quick. I came up with a great idea. When i sit down on that fat pillow next to the books, i would spread my booty cheeks just a bit to silence the fart (im a professional.) Next, i would let the pillow soak up all the smell, if there was any. It was prefect, but now i had to execute it. I took my book, and marched to the reading corner. But, everything went horribly wrong. When my butt started to fall on the cushion, the fart had already came out, for it had reached its limit. I could feel the tingling sensation as it escaped my butthole. The fart was long and loud, like a nuclear bomb explosion. It echoed off the walls, and bounced right back to me. I sat in horror, for my plan was down the drain. The fart that was supposed to be silent was crisp and wafted through the air. Everyone stared at me.... and i blamed it on my book when i had closed it.