I just wanna disappear right now

I cut off communications with a group since quarantine started and since i hold a position in the group and they need me to respond they contacted me this pask week. I chose the ignore route and suddenly my friends told me the group was asking for me so i had no choice but to respond. Honestly i wanna cry and disappear rn i have no one to talk to about this and I don’t have the guts to tell them i want out of it. I love them but they scare me.