Tl;dr Expressing my emotions.

Okay, so I saw someone vent and I wanted to express my emotions, too, so just click off since this isnt important. Why am I so fucking worthless and pathetic why cant I be a good child, fhe obedient child, the child everyone wants??? WHY? IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK FOR? SO WHY DO I HAVE TO BE BORN LIKE THIS?I HATE LIFE SO MUCH I WANT TO DIE BUT IM TOO MUCH OF A COWARD so ill cut my arm instead, but then ill be ugly, and now I cant stop so what do I do? WHY DOES EVERYONE ASK ME WHY I DO IT? I DONT KNOW, OKAY? So please, just give me a hug...

Thats all, okay. I just want a hug, someone to tell me, "It's alright, its not your fault, I love you, you're worth so much to me." Please... I dont want to live like this, I want to be happy, Ibdont want to make everything about me anymore... I want to laugh with everyone else.

But why cant I? I start cutting my hair too, now Im hideous, I just want to be left alone, but I want to cry in someones arms, like I did when I was a child, please, allow me to, I want to feel the warmth, the feeling of safety... not just a stuffed animal. Human warmth... Oh, it feels nice to be able to finally cry in someones arms, be told, "its okay, i love you, its not your fault." Thank you so much, father, this was all I longed for.