Please help me out

Please help me. This is a long post but I am really desperate and I can't talk to other people about this.

I have been in love with a person for over an year now. She lives in a different country, we are friends who talk on a daily basis. When I first realised I fell in love with her, I knew I was screwed. This is my first time liking someone even though I am in my early twenties.
From the start I had no hopes of getting together with her or even confessing. Nothing of that sort.
I just want to stay by her as a friend and like help her from the sidelines, being an emotional support and someone she can talk to?
But, I am an incredibly petty person and I get jealous even when I am not supposed to. And sometimes she is really mean and it hurts me so so much.
She is a person who doesn't express her feelings that much so she doesn't even pay compliments or other stuff like a good luck on my exam or things like that. I repeat, we talk on a regular basis.
Most of the time I am just afraid that I am just another person to her, even though she means so much to me(even without the whole I am in love with her deal).
I don't know what to do anymore, sometimes I hurt like crazy and I literally cry for a week. But on the other hand, I don't want to stop talking to her.
This is really messing up with my life and I am just clueless. I don't even want a romantic relationship out of this. Am I over reacting? Or am I acting too much like a clingy brat?