Yeah the more I realize my life the more sad I get

Tbh pretty much everyone who knows me in real life pretty much say I'm a very happy and jolly person but to me myself I don't really think so cause I know myself more than anyone in this world but I never really met a person in this life who at least know what really I'm going through and may not be fully but somehow understand me in some way. I'm gonna be honest with you all I'm a really really cautious person I don't seems like so to others but I am I choose my words before i say it and if I'm not sure I'm the type of person who would just stay quiet and shut my mouth up I've been realizing my own life much often lately and the more I realize it and think about it the more that I feel empty and void inside me I feel alone and lonely there are just times whenever I'm alone that I feel like I just want to cry myself out i have so many problems but i know that I'm not the only one who's suffering alone that's why I keep on holding on i keep putting a facade for everyone to see that I'm okay I'm a liar I know but I also feel like that my life is also full of lies just like me.