Having A Lover

so like . we been having issues and stuff. maybe ill elucidate another day but like i found a picture of a girl he used to like and like he had asked her out and stuff(she said no) and like they're still friends .(she has seen him like 3 times this year while im at 0) anyways she's literally a goddamn goddess . she's popular . she's smart etc. meanwhile me dude. oh lord i cannot describe how UGLAY i feel when i see her. im slightly not normal(dont wanna classify myself since no diagnosis except depression and anxiety have been made by a professional) but yea to give u a hint. im tall 5'8. i have short hair that i keep in line myself because im averse to barber shop experiences(i dont enjoy the process and its expensive )(we can afford it but i dont want it ig) anyways to
give u a clearer picture of me. i literally get mistaken for a man if i show upto school in PE clothes. if i wear a labcoat? then its over(i know this because a guy has accidentally thrown his arm and stuff over my shoulder thinking i was a dude). im not exactly thin. im not obese. i wear glasses(the other girl doesnt) even her name is prettier than mine. she's short cute and has good fashion sense while i dress up in jackets most of the time. i do not own any feminine tops as i dont really look nice in them(i buy them but i cant bring myself to wear them in public due to how fucking ugly i look) and i dunno man. IM COOKED for this man. like no other man fr comparing to him for me and i dunno it just hurts that im so ugly.
tips appreciated