yall ever read a very intense scene in a manga/hwa/hua and feel so anxious and overall bad that it continues to negatively affect your mood irl? like making you easily irritable and anxious over nothing.
no? it's just me? ok... time to get some sleep ig.
no? it's just me? ok... time to get some sleep ig.
So I've been really emotional lately. Like I could cry at the drop of a dime. So I'm listening to some music as one does when they're bored and the song you broke my heart again came on and I started crying, literally bawling my eyes out as soon as I heard it. So it ends and I'm left wondering why tf I'm so sad. Well flashback 2 years ago. I was 13 and I had just gotten a phone the previous Christmas and so my sneaky ass got tiktok and Snapchat behind my parents backs and I would go on omegle to find people I could give my snap to. And I come across this one guys and we exchange snaps and we talk some more. Well, as we're talking he tells me that he is around his friends and his friends take his phone and they start spamming shit and they sent voice clips and shit. And on more than one voice clip they said their friend thinks I'm really cute and shit so I'm like ok. So two days later he asks me out and I said yes. Mind you he lives all the way in Scotland and I'm in NY so we're a long distance relationship and he's 14 so it's not illegal lmao. But he was my first by and I fucking loved him. Like I know I was only 13 but we had future plans and we talked about marriage and shit like this. He even told his parents about me. And everything was good between us, we talked daily and sent selfies to each other and facetimed through snap. But he started getting involved in drugs so we took a break for about a week and I got grounded so we didn't talk for two weeks. Well the first day we talk again I send a pic of myself with my hair down. Mind you this was the first picture I had sent him with my hair down and I was really confident that day. And he straight up says "I went out with that for a month?". So we broke up and I literally cried for days. On the third day of not texting he tells me he's sorry. Apparently he was high on something and he said what he said. Anyways time goes on and my cousin has his snap and they snap daily and he keeps calling her pretty and I'm like bro why bc it had only been maybe a month since we had broken up and he went to my cousin. But I shrug it off. And around the same time I got my phone taken bc my parents found out about snap and tiktok so I didn't have a phone for a year or more. And a couple months ago my cousin tells me he apparently overdosed and lost his memory or some shit and I didn't believe it. Until I facetimed him and he really didn't know who I was. And it broke my heart. So I just recently tried reconnecting with him bc I guess he somewhat gained his memory back and he was being a complete dick to me. So now here I am bawling my eyes out about a guy who called me ugly, forgot about me, and then was an asshole to me again yet I'm still in love with him after 2 fucking years. So I'm gonna go cry some more before my parents wake up and thank you if you genuinely read all of this bullshit. And if you could give me any tips on how to get rid of my feelings for him, I'd appreciate it.
- Cleaning Rag
- Cleaning Rag
Your most recent pic is your reaction
your 69th picture is the reaction
(if its the wrong your youre or shit i dint give a fuck)
(if its the wrong your youre or shit i dint give a fuck)
how would you murder someone?
what weapons would you use?
what would you do to the person you killed like would you wear their skin or something like that
i would probs just use a knife
POSSIBLE SPOILER FOR TPN( the promise neverland)
i would stick a red flower in their heart and drain some of their blood and when the police find the body i would play isabella lullaby like in tpn
i wanna see how ppl who have seen tpn would react
what weapons would you use?
what would you do to the person you killed like would you wear their skin or something like that
i would probs just use a knife
POSSIBLE SPOILER FOR TPN( the promise neverland)
i would stick a red flower in their heart and drain some of their blood and when the police find the body i would play isabella lullaby like in tpn
i wanna see how ppl who have seen tpn would react
Why the fuck does almost everyone on instagram think it's fun to spoil the latest episode of Attack on Titan? Like wtf?!?! I haven't even watched it yet and now I'm bawling my eyes out and wishing they all would commit scooter ankle and step on legos.
Do you have any toxic traits?
Btw I was hungry but im not hungry anymore. Cuz I ate food.
Btw I was hungry but im not hungry anymore. Cuz I ate food.
For me my step- dad used to get in to me because whenever I got out of the shower the mirror fogged up....like bitch you expect me to either take a cold ass shower or leave the door open. Neither of those options sounds very nice considering the bathroom door was only a corner away from the front door.
I just realised I genuinely can't stand white American gays. Especially loud ones who use AAVE and idk if that's homophobic or they're just annoying. Especially Spencewuah/millz types. Even worse of they participate in yaoi/Bl discourse when their opinion is irrelevant because only East Asian men can tell us what East Asian media is correctly or incorrectly representing them. O the ones who use Fujoshi, (a word reclaimed by female Japanse BL readers )as an insult.
Who could ever have guessed that the phone would fall from the back pocket on your jeans!
Your 3rd pic is your reaction while you're taking your phone from the toilet.
Gl.
Your 3rd pic is your reaction while you're taking your phone from the toilet.
Gl.
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<3
<3
May you look at the following pictures below as i am afraid it has not received that much attention
T.W: Abuse
After 1-2 years, yesterday my mom just started to lash/vent her anger out on me again. She heard me crying, and got pissed somehow. She went there, pulled my hair, punched me in the arm and dragged me to a bedroom and started to yell at me and hit me. I was sobbing and shaking by that point and she noticed that and yelled at me to stop then dragged me to the kitchen and made me do my school work there (I was doing a project before she lashed out at me, and I was crying bc of the video we were assigned to watch to write an essay from), coincidentally after she did that, my uncle came to visit our house unexpectedly, and my grandma offered him to eat as always. We had two tables in the kitchen, I was sitting on the left one and he was eating at the right. My grandma started talking to him more than she usually does, probably to distract him from looking at me bc I was really trying to keep quiet from crying. I tried to leave because I was really embarrassed, but she pulled me down saying “Come back here and sit back down.” sternly. I had no other choice but to sit back down; my face in a crying mess. Whenever I tried to wipe my tears she would hit my arm with a metal ruler. Whenever I slowed down even for a bit she would hit the table with it and it would crack loudly which scares me everytime because I developed the fear of loud sounds/ shouting 2 years ago, which was a result of her abusing me too.
I tried leaving multiple times, but it always lead to me getting pulled back. I think my uncle put two and two together and started distracting my mom so I can leave to compose/fix myself. He asked her for juice, so she had to leave to leave to make some. I took the opportunity to rush to my bedroom and fix myself. I went back as quickly possible after that.
After my uncle left, she told me to eat dinner whilst she lectured me. She told me “How can you cry just because of a video?” “You keep crying so much because of those things you’ve read and watched but you can’t even cry that much when I told you about your dad?” “Its like you didn’t even care!”. I was so upset that I wanted to scream, but I was too scared and petrified in place to do so. My dad disappeared when I was 4 which caused my family to move to my grandma’s house. 2 years ago she revealed to me why, it was also the same year wherein she started abusing me. She started using the fact that I knew what happened to my dad as something to guilt trip me with. She told me to quicken up my pace (of eating) more and more. Even when I was starting to gag. She continued yelling at me for the rest of the night until 11, whilst I still occasionally cried, just silently this time.
My eyes are still swollen and I’m still shaking until today, I can’t even think straight so I’m sorry if any of these didn’t make any sense. I’ve been recovering pretty decently after her abuse, but I feel like I’m about to relapse. I have no one to go to because they’ll all be on my mom’s side. I really don’t know what to do. Idk if anyone will see this but it lifts some weight off my shoulders by sharing this. (P.S: I’m writing this in a throwaway acc for obvious reasons.)
After 1-2 years, yesterday my mom just started to lash/vent her anger out on me again. She heard me crying, and got pissed somehow. She went there, pulled my hair, punched me in the arm and dragged me to a bedroom and started to yell at me and hit me. I was sobbing and shaking by that point and she noticed that and yelled at me to stop then dragged me to the kitchen and made me do my school work there (I was doing a project before she lashed out at me, and I was crying bc of the video we were assigned to watch to write an essay from), coincidentally after she did that, my uncle came to visit our house unexpectedly, and my grandma offered him to eat as always. We had two tables in the kitchen, I was sitting on the left one and he was eating at the right. My grandma started talking to him more than she usually does, probably to distract him from looking at me bc I was really trying to keep quiet from crying. I tried to leave because I was really embarrassed, but she pulled me down saying “Come back here and sit back down.” sternly. I had no other choice but to sit back down; my face in a crying mess. Whenever I tried to wipe my tears she would hit my arm with a metal ruler. Whenever I slowed down even for a bit she would hit the table with it and it would crack loudly which scares me everytime because I developed the fear of loud sounds/ shouting 2 years ago, which was a result of her abusing me too.
I tried leaving multiple times, but it always lead to me getting pulled back. I think my uncle put two and two together and started distracting my mom so I can leave to compose/fix myself. He asked her for juice, so she had to leave to leave to make some. I took the opportunity to rush to my bedroom and fix myself. I went back as quickly possible after that.
After my uncle left, she told me to eat dinner whilst she lectured me. She told me “How can you cry just because of a video?” “You keep crying so much because of those things you’ve read and watched but you can’t even cry that much when I told you about your dad?” “Its like you didn’t even care!”. I was so upset that I wanted to scream, but I was too scared and petrified in place to do so. My dad disappeared when I was 4 which caused my family to move to my grandma’s house. 2 years ago she revealed to me why, it was also the same year wherein she started abusing me. She started using the fact that I knew what happened to my dad as something to guilt trip me with. She told me to quicken up my pace (of eating) more and more. Even when I was starting to gag. She continued yelling at me for the rest of the night until 11, whilst I still occasionally cried, just silently this time.
My eyes are still swollen and I’m still shaking until today, I can’t even think straight so I’m sorry if any of these didn’t make any sense. I’ve been recovering pretty decently after her abuse, but I feel like I’m about to relapse. I have no one to go to because they’ll all be on my mom’s side. I really don’t know what to do. Idk if anyone will see this but it lifts some weight off my shoulders by sharing this. (P.S: I’m writing this in a throwaway acc for obvious reasons.)
I don’t know what’s going on I haven’t been able to sleep because of work from all my classes like goddamn why does my English teacher want 4 essays per week can we like not? My Psychology teacher keeps giving us the most confusing shit in existence. My math teacher doesn’t even teach just tells us to go to some random ass website online that WE have to pay for. I have no idea wtf my chemistry teacher is even saying due to his accent and that he talks fast and I simply don’t get the math part of chemistry.
I now weigh 78 lbs as a person with a height of 5’3 and I look like fucking skeleton I think I’m getting overwhelmed and my body is preparing me for the mental breakdown idk what’s going on
I now weigh 78 lbs as a person with a height of 5’3 and I look like fucking skeleton I think I’m getting overwhelmed and my body is preparing me for the mental breakdown idk what’s going on
idk if i can talk about this here but I kinda of want to see the opinion of ya'll. So, my mom recently discovered that I was on my cell late even after she sent me to sleep, and she now takes my cell phone at night so I don't use it (she isn't wrong doing this tbh). But now I feel an inexplicable despair at night, my heart is racing and I start to cry having bad thoughts about the future and that I am not enjoying my life and a irrational fear of dying?? And bcuz of that I can't sleep. I thought it was okay if it was only at night, and that I just needed to endure it. But now I'm feeling that way in the morning too, I absolutely hate to feel this way. I related this to anxiety, I guess, but I wanted to know if it would be better for me to ask my mother for therapy, but I'm afraid I'm just exaggerating? I have no one to talk to about it. When I slept at dawn while using my cell phone, I was only sleepying when I am so tired to the point of just lying down and sleeping, without thinking about anything else. And the cell also distracted me. And I totally don't know how to ask for therapy either.
(Context: I feel that way for about 5 years, but this is the first time it's so bad, so- ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶)
(Context: I feel that way for about 5 years, but this is the first time it's so bad, so- ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶)
Be the first to send a text without being scared? How do people start and keep conversations going? I have selective mutism so this whole talking to people both physically and through text is hard, especially if it's someone I want to know more about. There's this guy I've been texting off and on the past few years. Our conversations never go past asking each other how we're doing. I don't know what to say next and I guess he doesn't either. He usually texts me first. But I want to do it first this time. I want to ask him how his day has been. I know he won't be upset about it or, as my mom used to tell me, bite my head off. It's a simple question I know he will answer. It's just a text. It isn't like I'm calling him. I want him to know that I am interested in him but I'm scared and I hate that. How do people do this?
Ps: I was scared to post this but my cats convinced me to just do it lol.
Ps: I was scared to post this but my cats convinced me to just do it lol.
I have a major problem about talking/dealing with people, i can't even talk with my family sometimes because i think i'm being a constant nuisance and it kinda makes me feel like the worse human being alive, people always say i distance myself from others and how I don't try to make friendships/relationships last, it's like something blocks me from telling them (and even messaging them) how i feel and it piles up until I end up having a panic attack and it sucks so much.
I don't text anyone first, nor I call anyone first because i fear i would annoy my friends/family, i literally have a mental crisis everytime I'm sending someone a simple "hi" message.
Do any of y'all have a problem like this ? How do you cope?
I don't text anyone first, nor I call anyone first because i fear i would annoy my friends/family, i literally have a mental crisis everytime I'm sending someone a simple "hi" message.
Do any of y'all have a problem like this ? How do you cope?
They're precious to me and my other friends but we can only help them with sending memes, laugh together, and playing games. It's effective for their mental though, but the think of wanting to gave up and being emotionless doesn't disappear from their head.
Get well soon, dude:(
Get well soon, dude:(