No Fuccs Left To Give

If nutting to drawings isn't considered sex, then nutting to drawings shouldn't be considered gay. It is quite natural for a Male to be attracted to that which has feminine features, and traps have most of those features. It's not our fault they have a dicks. People that like traps are actually more straight because they can find girls attractive even with negative features (dicks). Because we are willing to be attracted to more feminine beings than normal people are, we are less gay. Traps are not mere men, but girls with dicks and small tits. We are not gay, we are just more accepting than most people. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

Now hear me out. When masturbating you're essentially both giving AND receiving a handjob at the same time from a guy. That’s pretty fucking gay if you ask me. Now say you see a cute guy, his ass is so fucking nice and slappable, his juicy feminine lips look like they were made to be wrapped around your cock, and his hands are soft and slender, maybe even more so than your own (thereby making it even less gay). You make your move and he agrees to give you a handy. In this case, you’re simply receiving a handjob, you aren’t giving one as well. That’s half the gay, guys. Stop masturbating, it’s gay as fuck. Get yourself a man that’ll give you a hand.

P.S. if you do decide to give him one back in return because his beautiful, glistening, throbbing cock is just sitting there asking to be stroked, just make sure he’s somewhat more feminine than yourself because technically, giving and receiving a handjob from someone more feminine is less gay than someone who is more masculine (yourself).

EDIT: would giving AND receiving a handjob from a male be equivalently/less gay than just receiving OR giving a blowjob?? Please let me know because I’m no gayer than the average straight man who indulges in masturbation but I really, really want to suck my friend’s cock.