Sometimes they use the excuse "it's confusing" to avoid conflict when they just don't wanna use they/them pronouns for an individual - people who demand to be referred to by they/them pronouns are typically very histrionic or narcissistic, chronically online individuals & some ppl don't wanna encourage that! Hope this helps :)
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As a non-native English speaker who learned English at a young age, I was taught that they/them was both a singular and a plural pronoun. So, I've always referred to everything/everyone as they/them for simplicity and mainly because I hated using he/she or him/her. Seeing so many people insist that they/them is only plural is making me so confused.
