imcrazybutimfree's manga / #Possessive lover(20)

I’m conflicted. Both Gabriel’s personalities were suffering and they both did terrible choices. At first I liked Rafael the better, since he’s more the “idgaf” type, but Gabriel’s obsessive insecurity took me to develop a soft spot for him, but he still was so sure of his own crazy acts to the point of no return (and no forgiveness). In the end Rafael is a manipulative and lying bitch just like Gabriel and Colin is being deceived again. If they start hanging out their whole relationship would be based on a fucking lie and that’s worse than before, because Colin already felt it on his own skin. It would have been nice if the devil has actually taken Gabriel’s memory, since if that happened the smile Gabriel showed to Colin would have really been the same as when they were kids. Just imagine: all bad happenings of life disappearing from your mind and you being just the person you are, with external environment not influencing at all. But that’s not the case. Very interesting.

The plot itself was nothing much but the concept behind it was very powerful. Akino found his reason to live in Eichi because he gave him the purpose he needed and the necessary to organise his meaningless life towards the reaching of a goal. Eichi was his saviour and muse at the same time, which is a very romantic trope at my advice. Moreover Akino too became a saviour to Eichi, because the love he received from him helped him to overcome his childhood trauma and gave him a key to read his own existence and finally appreciate his own self not only as a model but first of all as a human being. But still, they both love and at same time “use” each other to leave a mark on the world in their own way. Very interesting!! I don’t rate it with five stars only because some things were kinda confused, like the whole matter about Akino actually spreading the rumour about Eichi and his drama co-star. I didn’t really get it why he did that (I guess he was searching for visibility for his collection? but still, was it really necessary?) and what was part of his “bigger plan”? Maybe he wanted to get Eichi to open up and move on? Who knows, it’s not clear at all :/

I was worried when I saw Momo kinda forcing himself on Yoshiko, but the love story with all that stuff about Momo being attracted to Yoshiko’s both feminine and masculine counterpart was really cute, Yoshiko’s internalised homophobia hit really hard, and the development of his character’s sexual awareness was very interesting and heart clenching to read. If it wasn’t for Momo’s extreme possessiveness in the first chapters I would have rated it 5 stars hands down. Overall a good read.

There are theories in the comments saying that the blonde guy was probably a substitute for the younger brother and I think it kinda makes sense, but I’m not sure about the blonde guy being aware of it or not. He likely chased the uke away because of jealousy, but this jealous might have been caused by both awareness of being his substitute or annoyance due to the important presence of the uke in the seme’s life at that time. I’m pretty certain that the seme had developed deep feelings for the uke in the past, but what makes this story so interesting is that the seme’s feelings are closer to an obsessive brotherly attachment that eventually developed into an equally obsessive romantic and sexual love than actual healthy romantic love. In fact an important difference exists between loving someone and not being able to live without them. I wish it was longer,

NOOO I WAS WAITING FOR THE GREAT REVELATION OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP TO THEIR FAMILIESSSS

The bondage stuff had so much potential! A bdsm smut scene between Umi and Kyoichi and the exhibit of their modelling works should have been definitely shown!!