ReviewRaptor's manga / #LACKING(441)

Review/Critique, so be warned. This works as a self-insert very well, but NOT if you're not exactly into the type of person the love interest here is and NOT if you cannot relate exactly to the MC. From the very start the story is weird and feels like emotions and thoughts do not come across well. As well as general intentions of anyone in this story. The MC is a bit of a weirdo but quite bland and simple. Yet the love interest is so weirdly random seemingly that it would have greatly benefitted him if the author hinted more at HIS side of emotions and intentions. Because, to me, first it felt like he was SUPER pissed that the MC wanted to use 'playing gay' as a means to win the show because he finds it offensive to use gayness as a gimmick. Yet, it turns out, he had been given a wishy-washy tsundere personality and he was into the MC. If it was portrayed differently, this might have worked okay but as it was done here, it just seems random. Almost like the author had no set script or really thought about the story much. It's funny for sure but the romance between them is just 'off' and feels randomly done just for the sake of getting them together SOMEHOW, by any means to get to the author's preferred part. I also find the love interest VERY unappealing in terms of personality tbh, but I'm sure someone will like a cranky jerk that thinks he can get upset about playing house and realizing it's not reality. XD It's probably a decent read for beginners but not for seasoned readers, but even there I'd not recommend it because it's honestly not that well written as a romance. As a comedy piece, sure, it's worth flipping the pages. But I'd not recommend it as a romance comic to anyone that asked me for recs. Sadly. Because, as someone below said: The premise IS very interesting. The execution is just badly done.

Okay so I started reading this but for some reason the writing just doesn't make the story intriguing. The characters also feel very bland somehow. I also have a hard time finding ANY appealing quality in the 'love interest' of the MC. Not a very good combo for a comic in my opinion. Which is a shame since I'm running out of stuff to read while updates take ages to roll in. XD

I'm at chapter 5 only and I must say, the plot feels quite rushed. Like a condensed version of a detailed plot, loosing detail along the way to move along quicker, if you know what I mean? The art should have gone the usual plan of portraying the characters in a suggestive way tho that makes us wonder if they are suddenly evil but before were not (as it was portrayed, the Duke seemed just as emotionally constipated as any other moment, little bit dick-head-ish too ngl), spoiler/'spoiler' ahead if what I heard is correct: If this story is the regular trope of the new woman having manipulative magic abilities, then the artist should DEFINITELY have hinted at her being suspect and the ML being somewhat different all of a sudden, visually I mean.Even just his eyes being less highlighted would have done the trick for me. No need to make a huge deal about adding extra stuff. As it is now, it feels weird, lackluster and like he only behaves the way he needs to in the moment. In a way it makes sense, because we only see things from the MCs perspective, but it is a very weird read when it feels like the ML just acts like the moment calls for instead of obviously being different all of a sudden. Kinda like a MacGuyver moment, but in shitty and annoying. X'D EDIT: Chapter 7 now - There is quite a few very confusing, abrupt and weird scene changes that do not happen in a smooth or clear manner. Just, POOF, this happens now. XD I am also not fond of this type of plot in general tbh. Because authors tend to portray this plot as 'its the guys fault BUH' but fail to acknowledge: Had she said even once or twice that the maids, butlers and so on do NOT treat her appropriately, most if anything of this would not even have happened. I LOATHE plots like this, it's nonsensical, idiotic and makes me really think authors love to use the men as scapegoats because they don't want to admit fault in their 'heroine' even in the most basic and obvious ways. The ending of chapter 7 has me thinking the artist does NOT pay attention to the story btw. That expression at the end did NOT match the dire realization/situation the MC is in. Kinda disappointing tbh. That SHOULD have been an impactful, emotional moment, but it was dull, boring and basically glossed over in a certain sense. I do hope it gets better and less rushed. Putting in more detailwork to emphasize emotions and let things take a moment to settle in would do this comic VERY well. EDIT 2: The more I read, the more annoying the story somehow gets. It's like the characters are only likable when they have a pair of tits, literally all males are portrayed/condensed to: men evil. ALL of them feel bland. And they all seem to just be there, doing a dumb. It's ridiculous to think the Duke would NOT have an aid to talk to, guards to talk to, servants etc. THEY EXIST, wtf is the author doing ignoring the simple factor of having him go talk to them sternly after finding out fuck ups?? Nothing else makes any decent sense. This is just drama for drama's sake. Which has never been good writing btw. I also noticed that the story goes with this logic: We never portray the Duke actually giving a shit about the MC, but all of a sudden, when she tries to leave, he feels the need to stop her 'despite being manipulated' by the magic of the new woman. That makes NO sense. At least not if you do not even once portray him caring about her. This is writing 101 at this point. And the story didn't nail it. wtf. XD If this keeps going, I'll definitely drop this. I caught myself wanting to just flip pages to move to something interesting already, which isn't good. EDIT 3: Scratch that last part, I'm out. I cannot stand more of this nonsense. This story might be a decent read for younger, inexperienced readers, but not for seasoned readers that like cohesive and good writing.

This has more faults than a somewhat shitty translation work. There are random af decisions from characters that hardly make any sense, RANDOM AF scene changes where they should NOT be and the writing (what I CAN judge anyway) is really just lackluster and uninteresting. Neither the characters nor the story are interesting. We have seen this multiple times already but this lacks making even the MC interesting. So I'd honestly not recommend this.

The story is a bit amateur-ish in writing. There are quick scene changes, althought small ones, but there is also the issue of not letting emotions get to the readers. It just happens and then the next thing happens. It's not really well written. The anatomy of the characters is REALLY not my thing, Roblox Anatomy 101. XD And the fucking blurry irises of the MC and such REALLY REEEEAAAALLY annoy my eyes. It might be a nice read for beginners or MAYBE to flip pages for the smut chapters (I don't know, I'll not bother reading anymore of this) but all in all it's not really something I would recommend in any way. It's nice that the MC has a likable personality and the love interest is not the cliche bad boy or good guy type, but the faults I find are not enough to keep me invested.

The writing and the sudden scene skipping as well as the fact that there are MANY moments in which the author does not let emotions develope enough or settle in is very much hinting at this being a newcomer to comics. The art too is sometimes randomly chibi-fied, which is supposed to indicate a lighter mood or funny moment but...that was NOT the appropriate choice at that moment. It's not bad but not good either, but certainly a decent first attempt that can yield some experience for the creator on how to do things. Now, the STORY, that aspect is incredibly interesting and I am inclined to go read the novel if there is one. Because I think it'll be a better read than the comic tbh. Both the MC and the ML are lovely in terms of personality and design and the overall plot is really intruiging BUT can be seen as rushed and boring at times because of the faults I first listed. I like it and hope the author gathers more experience and creates better comics in their future too. Preferably stories like these, who's plot we have NOT seen a million times. X'D It's a nice read, especially for less experienced readers, but even seasoned ones can enjoy it if they go into it with the newcomer aspect kept in mind. :)

The writing is absolutely lackluster. The author knows the story but does not explain it in even so much as the first chapter, you're just thrown random TINY bits of info and that's it, you're supposed to know wtf just happened and it sufficing as an adequate information to understand the setting. This is VERY shit writing and it's honestly making me loose all interest. Not sure if it'll get better later on (I heavily doubt it tho) but I for one will not bother reading this.

Not the best display for mysophobic behavior in a serious sense. I hope the writing isn't half-assed, tho it IS a smut story so chances are high enough. It'd be nice to have a story with this mental problem again but the start of this story doesn't give me high hopes tbh. It's a very mish-mash display, like someone just read up on the disorder real quick and then went to writing the story. Because he's more of a clean freak with VERY few mysophobic MOMENTS rather than a full on mysophobia-ridden person. ^^; I suspect the mental problem is only used as a 'fun gimmick' for the story and some scenes, which doesn't sit well with me tbh but for people who don't care or don't know the problem and how it really is irl this probably doesn't matter. So, this is a case by case point that can make the story a normal read or maybe give minus points in ratings I suppose. The art is decent, the base plot is interesting and the characters too, so I'm hoping for the story to actually NOT try displaying a mental problem correctly. Again, this IS smut tagged. The translations are so-so. I can see some Google Translate bubbles here and there, clearly, so I'll probably wait for the officials.

With the white-hair dude having SUCH a shit personality and their interaction at the very start already being SO weird, I'll not even bother with this.