ReviewRaptor's manga / #LACKING(493)

Alright, hear me out. Lemme cook, it's hot now but we'll cool down. :v (Critique ahead, so beware.) The base story is very interesting, the art is decent and the characters around the MC intriguing (although a bit too shallow in personality). The MC however, is what ruins this story. And that is an absolute dealbreaker. I like me some drama but the already way too obnoxious trope of hating people that have not done ANYTHING WRONG to you in a re-run is just getting on my nerves SO very much. Don't get me wrong, this trope CAN work, if written in a good way, but this is definitely NOT it. She's not careful and pessimistic due to trauma, she's behaving like what someone who THINKS they know how trauma works would write a character. The way the author portrays her makes her more annoying, dumb and weird instead of a damaged person that has to deal with trauma and tries to adjust to current happenings. The author HAS made her realize very early on that things have changed, she acknowledged that!, yet on the very next page she ignores it and acts like that realization never happened. This is a HUGE fault when writing a traumatized character, because that realization would have a big impact and remain in memory. It would make her at least second guess each action from others and make her at least think about it having a positive aspect. But what annoyed me the most so far (16 chapters in) is this: She pretends her references and ideas of a situation are reality and treats them as a fact. In some sense it is similar to how trauma can work (in a VERY vague way), but not how it's done in this story and the different moments. I have endured 16 chapters of her obnoxious attititude and while i was very understanding at first, this got obnoxious VERY quick and downright stupid. I mean, the fvck you talking about 'horrifying ceremony'?? HE GAVE YOU A FRUIT FFS. X'D The only thing barbaric and horrifying was your idea of pretending the red juice was blood and wolves tear prey apart and eat together. Stop acting like that's the same. Your analogies are NOT reality. This is NOT Twitter. Please stop this nonsense, dear author. At this point it is NOT the other characters that are in the wrong, IT IS ONLY HER. And I doubt it'll change in a realistic, normal manner based on the bad writing. The author is continuously re-chewing the past only when it fits to make her seem more miserable, justify her attitude or make the other people (who are ALL nice to her btw!) look horrible despite that not being in relation to the current reality. This already gives me Mary Sue vibes and Mary Sue's are NOT good characters despite 3rd wave feminists thinking otherwise. X'D The writing is horrible tbh. It runs the path of using happenstances from the past to be anything inbetween pitiful towards oneself up to being an obnoxious idiot or rude towards others even. Which is NOT the way to go. It does not make your character likable at all. And it will not make people want to read more about this character. I'm sorry, but THIS is not how you use this trope. THIS is precisely why people learned to hate it. And the misplaced, seemingly random, funny chibi haha panels do NOT help this entire mess. It makes it seem even more like the author doesn't know what they are doing. Which I hope changes in the future. Improving their writing skills is very much needed at this stage. To sum it up; the author failed majestically at making the MC likable and despite her acknowledging current life being different. It feels really more like the author simply THINKS this is what traumatized people are like (like people on Twitter and TikTok always do) instead of researching the nuances needed to make each negative reaction actually realistic, plausible and relatable/understandable. The author should research some more about how to alter these kinda characters to make them understandable and likable. This is KEY to fictional works. Sadly this one missed the mark. It's likely a good read for younger/less experienced readers, but seasoned readers should probably stay away from this one. The story seems to have changed in chapter 44, but I do not know if it was done in a good way. Not sure if I'll bother reading more tbh, nothing in this story is appealing tbh.

I really like the story, but the very sudden, unexplained scene changes really are a bit confusing at times and break the immersion. I find it highly likely that this is not the same as in the novel, if this is based on one. Which I find all the more bothersome since, with smooth transitions and explainations, this comic would be a great read. I'm only on chapter 5 so far but I really hope the author doesn't keep doing this. The constant moments of "Why the fvck are we suddenly in a room with people that never appeared before??" is a bit annoying tbh. XD In general, the author could really need some taking time (it really feels almost like rushing sometimes) and ESPECIALLY with explainations in the important parts. It's weird they decided to gush over the prince as he randomly appeared after a scene change that confused me, yet neither the second brother nor the aunt got even so much as a sign with a name and title to introduce them. In a novel this might work, since you write it like this: "[insert dialogue]", said the MCs red-haired aunt angrily while slapping her fan into her hands. Leaving the description after the dialogue entirely out is NOT a good way to re-do a script into a comic. You NEED to mention who the person is if the situation makes them important (which an angry family member out of thin air definitely is XD). I'll keep reading, but if these issues keep appearing this might become a chore or annoyance that could make me change my mind on wanting to see this story unfold. It's really not pleasant for a experienced reader/writer. :')

Who of us would actually ever be interested in someone that whores around directly in front of us, trying to trigger any response and then tries to persue us? I for one would loose all interest in the person tbh. I get screwing around, but if you try this bs with me, I'm out. Hence why I have zero interest in reading this. It's not logical behavior and will likely only be turned into a 'love story' with a giant doze of manga magicks. No thanks. ^^

Realistic clothes but a Mary Sue-type logic plot in many aspects. Kinda a r/im14andthisisdeep vibe in many aspects. If you like Mary Sue logic and fich-eyed girls, this is totally for you tho!

I really HATE plots that mix medieval/historical clothes and settings with modern stuff. PICK ONE FFS. XD

Review/Critique ahead, you have been warned. It's honestly not the greatest writing. The story has potential but given the author decided to to use it bothers me. As LaNasha below in the comments mentioned: She's aware she can change stuff, yet doesn't care to do so in crucial and VERY IMPORTANT parts of the story. I know this is a medieval-like setting and people back then didn't understand mental problems (because that is ultumately what the villain's problem is), but she's aware of what is happening and isn't doing jack. That's just bad writing no matter how you try to twist it. Unless you want to insert drama for dramas sake in a story YOU set up to have less drama and be about changing one's story and that of others alongside your own. It's decent as a beginner thing, probably great for newer readers or kids that don't understand how dumb the writing is at times, but I for one have too much experience with good writing to read this. Which is a shame since I love these plots about people regressing and then finding a loving family dynamic waiting for them. Shame this one went to waste. It's not a horrible story, but not good either. The art is decent but isn't extraordinary so that I would stay for that aspect alone. I suggest checking it out for yourself, but seasoned readers will likely not find this great given the writing issues. It might not be a dealbreaker for all, but I for one don't like the nonsensical logic so I'll be moving to the next story. I do hope the author creates more stories tho, amybe learns more about how to portray sadness and trauma tho (that father would NOT have smiled moments after finding his wife just because the child thought he was gonna off another kid). There is plenty room for improvement so I have hopes for this as it's not too bad in many aspects. :)