ni-ka-CHUUUUUUUUUU's manga / #realistic(7)

One of the most adorable ukes ever!!!!! His insecurity is very realistic and relatable.

Ugh this is so half-baked and unsatisfying. I liked where this was going but it resolved waaaaay too quickly. Seme has unrequited love for 10 years and uke just all of a sudden says it's cool and now they're lovers? And why the fuck did they set up that whole the uke crying because of the older brother?! What exactly was their relationship?There should have been more chapters to better develop it. That's too bad because this had so much potential!!!

3.75 MASSIVE rant on this manga because it just has SOOOOOO much. I quite liked this manga. It had a lot of aspects that I typically like in a yaoi: gay uke with unrequited love for cold straight seme since high school and reencounter each other => both end up having a physical relationship with mainly the seme kinda driving the relationship because he's still unsure about his feelings => misunderstanding misunderstanding =>the seme to finally confesses => couple formation => the typical issues a bl couple have after they become an item (ie coming out, labels). However, it's clear this manga has soooooo much potential in terms of plot and character development but never fulling reaches it. For instance, I felt the manga often lacked emotionally, particularly the characters. Idk maybe I'm just so used to exaggerated fwah fwah moments where the uke's eyes are glistening and shit and the seme all taken aback and that this manga never seemed to have that. While it is kinda refreshing the uke isn't crying every 20 pages, the lack of obvious expressions on the characters faces kinda made most of the story feel not as sincere as it could be. And not just facial expressions, but also a lot of the dialogue in the story kinda seemed ingeninue and off, making me have less of an attachment to the story and characters. There was also a lot in the story development that I didn't like very much. For instance, that one guy (not the friend but btdubs the uke seems to have A LOT of suitors) who had feelings for the uke. I know it was meant to connect to the seme's trust issues but still it was just kinda there. And I never really got why the uke was totally fine stringing him along when he already knew about his feelings (that's a pretty dick thing to do if you ask me). I also didn't really get the development of the couple's relationship. While I enjoyed the pacing of their relationship, I could never really understand how or why both the uke and seme even liked each other in the first place (and maybe that's mainly because I find both the uke and seme to be kinda unlikeable). Though I'm more convinced about the uke's feelings, I never understood if the seme liked the uke as long as he had or that he's just been aware of him all this time and they just kinda went from there. Aside from the typical yaoi trope of the seme being hella aggressive and dominant in the initial physical relationship, what really bugs me is that the couple never really showed much development before they mutually confessed but then after that BOOM they're all lovey-dovey and smiling and having all these moments and shit. And even the character of the seme in general didn't seem that consistent. First he's this massive obnoxious dick, followed by this super stoic and expressionless guy, followed by hella passionate, followed by super caring and loving to the uke. Idk if this is just one weird-ass version of a tsundere, but this made it super confusing to figure out what the fuck the seme's deal is (I guess that's the point?) But maybe because this yaoi is more complex and developed than most is the reason I'm being super analytical about this. Even with all the issues I have for this manga, it's still refreshing in many ways, especially towards the end when it targets the issue of being gay in Japan. The response of both the couple and other characters actually seemed pretty realistic to how people today would respond: the out-of-the-closest uke who's already been pretty accepted by his family (mainly because of his sister) is anxious about his relationship with the originally straight seme who doesn't deny the relationship but is still coming to terms with it. The seme's colleague's response to when he came out was open-minded and accepting. And even the seme's parents' reaction was pretty understandable: the mother was completely against while the father seemed to tolerate it. Overall, I have A LOT of mixed emotions for this manga. There are some parts that got a bit dull, cliche, or even annoying. However it's because of all the topics and tropes it addresses that I can conclude that I did enjoy and like this.

3.5 I quite liked how realistic this felt to fall out of love and back in love. I'm glad the uke broke up with that asshole even though he put up with his dickwadness because he loved him. Really shows character development in the uke. My main issue is the conclusion of putting the uke with the supportive friend. It was way too rushed. I get why the friend had unrequited feelings for him but rushing the uke to love the friend makes his feelings seem not genuine. I would be much more satisfied if there was two or three chapters more on developing their relationship.

4.5 Holy fuck that was an emotional roller-coaster. It was angsty and messy and painfully realistic. This is first yaoi I've read where love seems to be portrayed how it would mostly likely be in the real world (Through I wouldn't actually know from experience). Everything about this is just so raw and real: Sexually, they are portrayed as REAL men; not the fantasy seme-uke role but actually have a legit gay relationship. They don't go through the generic "forbidden love" problems but real the relationship struggles that any couple would undergo, but more so because it's between a straight and a gay man. They both constantly contradict what they want and even acknowledge they aren't good together. But love isn't just pure and happiness, but is actually more complex and selfish, and their love is just that. They're two misfits who struggle with the definition of love and realize that it's what they have. I also really liked the role of the girlfriend. She epitomizes everything the straight guy believes love should be like, as well as his life as a straight man. She's not an instrument used to create excessive problems between the couple, but rather someone who creates psychological conflict for the straight guy. She was so real and was an actual human being who had some struggles but just ultimately fell in love with the straight guy. A million times better than the prequel. A different reread.

No WHY WHY WHY??? 20240423 OH. MY GOD. I don't think I've ever sobbed so hard at something ever in my entire life. My nose is clogged and my eyes are probably going to be swallowed shut tomorrow morning. This is incredibly beautiful. Each chapter More beautiful than the next and it just fucked me up more and more. I cannot explain how much I love this story. I think it's safe to say this is my all-time favorite yaoi (sorry itou san I still Love you very much)

As much as I found the story and art beautiful and refreshingly realistic, I can't help but think this needs more. I'm not completely satisfied with where the story was ended; both MCs are still overcoming their unrequited love for someone else, so there love is not yet developed enough. I mean I'm glad they have the time to figure that out themselves but as the reader you just want to see that development. You grow such an attachment to these characters that you feel like you're a part of their relationship and want to see them seamlessly achieving happiness (as unrealistic as that sounds but it's yaoi so w/e). I just want to see two people who seemed to have underwent unrequited feelings for so long to finally get REQUITED love!