buttcruncher's manga / #chaebol(3)

feel super bad for the uke, he has no one in his life. but i don't get it. why not just tell his grandfather he's not interested in taking over? even if he somehow had to pretend to be gay, surely there must have been a way for his ways to get out with a slew of nobodies? little details like that take me out of the story sometimes bc it just seems like things need to play out a certain way to maximize the feeling of trauma for a character.

the relationships are so messy, it's like an extended love arrow, but i'm not mad at it. i have mixed feelings about nan. he's self absorbed, but he at least is mature enough to not lead jaeon on. he recognizes that his brother goes thru great lengths to help him, but he definitely has youngest child syndrome bc his bro seems to carry the world on his shoulders to allow nan the life he has. i really want to see his side of the story. my favorite thing about him is how he recognizes how trivialized he's made to feel and his staunch refusal to acknowledge yiyeong's belated affections at all. i thought it was interesting that yiyeong's trying whatever angle he could claw at to find a way back into nan's good graces, oscillating between black flag and someone who's almost willing to want genuine well-being for him. but he's ultimately too selfish to let nan go. it's hard for me to know when someone should keep trying to fight for a relationship someone else doesn't want. the other person is hurt, broken, and is strong enough to want to move on, so isn't it a dickish move to not let them go and let them heal? what do i think for yiyeong? i think he definitely lost the veil of glamour to nan. he says he regrets not realizing his feelings earlier, but surely he must know on some level that he's been playing games? i don't think he reflected on himself at all. is he apologetic at all for how he treated nan? could he see at all how hurtful he was? does he even understand love and what he's asking for? is he willing to put his pride aside to bare his vulnerabilities to nan? i think if he can do those things, and be unselfish enough to respect nan's wishes if nan doesn't care to reciprocate, then maybe there's a chance nan would reconsider. if i were in nan's shoes i wouldn't see what yiyeong's actions so far as romantic at all. it doesn't feel like yiyeong sees nan, he's projecting his own expectations onto him. he does, functionally, treat nan like an object. he's acting like a parent that doesn't know how to parent. if he doesn't see where he fucked up is willing to put in the work to change, he doesn't deserve to be with nan. btw i love nan's char design but wish his body is more fleshed out and built. he looks normal in clothes but looks like an uber twink naked.