chikichiba's manga / #mystery(13)

trope: cold male lead x cold female lead

thriller + historical + mystery + yaoi + slow burn. neighbor to lovers, the seme is manipulative and kinda yandere the uke is kinda tsundere and i think he's a police or something

woww, i don't even know what i want to say. at first i think "the fuck did i just read" and "it's so creppy, you have to runaway" and etcetera, but this manhwa is so deep, so dark, and my jaw dropped when i read this. i feel the desperate, the sadness, the tense, the anxiety and the guilty. jaehyeok had schizophrenia, because the childhood trauma he got for abusive and avoidance father + his mother who never present. he carried that feelings all the way until one day, there's a lovely family who gived him uncontional positive regards, unconditional love. so when his father's died, and that family adopt him, he feel full of love and he finally being someone who get that love, but it's never been enough for him. because jinu, is someone his age and his bestfriend at the same time, got that love too. he feels jealousy and envy him. till one day he killed him and burried him in the pig farm. and because of jinu's died, that family suffering with depression and sadness and despair who end up kill themself except the father. that's actually crush my heart, they give you love, care and happiness but you kill someone precious to them, you killed jinu my sweet little boy, and ruined their family. but what can i say? you have mental illness and that's the reason you killed them. as if back then, someone take care of you and you're not have a dysfunctional family, and someone take you to the psychologist or therapist or psychiatrist whatsoever maybe this will not happening. anyway, such a good read, i really enjoy this manhwa, plot twist after plot twist after plot twist and the tragic beautiful story and how dark someone's brain can be, how the guilty effect them, and how the process with everything that happened to them, how the process their trauma and how they forgive the things that hurt them. i really adore this artwork, and what a masterpiece the author made, eeally good job. anyway, it's really show me how gratefull i am to be a normal people, to be have a good mental health and brain and to be shaped like this. and one thing you have to know, loving someone is never a waste. yes because your love jaehyeok kill your family, but he got suffered after all, he feel the amount of guilty as equal as the amount of love you gave him. he already suffering so much with that, i think yes, it's jaehyeok fault. but deep down, it's not him. it's eveything that shaped him, his trauma, his past, his childhood, how significant people around him treat him like a trash back then. at the end he just want to be loved whatever it takes, you just want to be loved, we just want to be loved.