pinkstarred's manga / #Painful(3)

Gus I must like pain cause I was so upset. God I really hated those two but also rooted for them sorta. I’m conflicted. I feel sooo much for Hanami but then he should of left long ago. Han-San was the only decent person almost. But then going out with a high schooler. This really was a clustfuck and painful, but also intriguing g and well written. It’s nonstop sex and drama.

God this is quite sad. They’re parents really did a number on them. But they’re individual problems seem to compliment eachother well. Someone afraid of being abandoned and used and an incredibly possessive lover. Sure it’s not really healthy...but at least they can work at it together. And he really went off the rails at his mind games. Yuujiis such a asshole for manipulating him like that.. he sort of made his bed. I like how he knows what his issue is and it’s bad and he’s trying to do better. Ofc he did it the exact wrong way at first...but at least they both know how they feel.

The way sensei depicted Kei's inner world was masterful. His inner child and the robot devoid of emotion that protects him from all the horrific pain he's had to survive. The wall of disassociation was just do beautifully depicted as Kei slowly transformed from Yutaka's love and care. And what a fucking turn, that was raw and horrible but riveting drama. Im so glad they got their happy end. Their beginning i find confusing, why would the blackmail be coerced sex? What was Kei getting from that? I dont really understand it. Like if he made a video of it and everything to threaten his exposure. As it was the force was really confusing. And just seemed like the irritating tropes that run across bl. But beyond that seeing the love was beautiful once that story started. I feel like the sexual blackmail soured the purity of what their love became.