Smells Like Green Spirit
2/21/21 added 12/4/23 read I AM IN TEARS FOR KIRINO kirino was happy to have finally found someone like mishima in that small town. they were gonna go to shangri-la to meet other people just like themselves. now kirino has to live with a mask because he’s decided the way to live his is by seeing his mom smile. so he never gets to see shangri-la or meet other people like him and his friendship with mishima is now more, in fact they never see each other after graduating and i’m crying again and can’t see my screen. kirino gets married and has a child with another on the way. that summer on the rooftop was the happiest he’s ever been and i can’t stop thinking about how comfortable he was up there hanging with mishima. ugh that’s so sad poot kirino. yumeno tho kinda makes up for the tears, he stays by mishima’s side and they both live in tokyo together. yumeno finally understands his feelings and understands his true self and accepts it. adding this comment here because it makes me feel better : when I first read this, I didn't fully understand about kirino's situation. I thought that kirino is not truly happy with his life, but when I reread this, I realized that it's not the case. I remember he said about something, like those people who are hiding something—their eyes are like so dark,lonely?empty, and that's the case when they are young (+ the teacher). but then at the end, it showed purposely in the panel—looking up, his eyes full of life, not like before and I thought to myself that he is happy. there's nothing he's hiding anymore. and he got two kids (one is incoming) plus his parents were back together. I'm assuming that when the mother fainted, the father made some realizations, then settled. Overall, I am very happy about kirino's life rn, it was confirmed in his eyes—it's like this is him, it's the life he chose and is happy. kirino's version of "this is 'mishima futoshi', this is 'me'" like mishima. Also, dragonflies symbolizes happiness, courage, and strength in Japan literature. Bittersweet for sure. Very realistic portrayal of different people coming to terms with being gay and how they choose to fit into society. The whole point is none of them chose wrong, they picked their own paths to happiness but even that isn’t guaranteed because it never is. Life is a struggle for most people but especially marginalized groups who are viewed differently I cried a lot Its such a bittersweet story about feelings and choices. I feel the worst for kirino He made his choice in the end to have a family but having not fulfilled all of his desires. At the end, the eyes of Mishima have changed, they are shining. Kirino's eyes have not, but he has not become like the sensei. Even so, he has this mask, even with the daughter. It is difficult. He did not made the wrong or right choice. Of course, his happiness should come first. But for him, that happiness lies in his mother's smile. It is not healthy, that is true. But people are not simple, right? The one he loves... Props to Tarou also. Sometimes, ignorance is bliss. But he decided to break through and study his feelings and his peers feelings. someone else : This hit me really hard. There is so much to unpack in just a few chapters. I'm over here crying my eyes out. Ohh my heart is breaking thinking about Kirino. I just wanted everyone to find their happiness and live their authentic self but life is sometimes bittersweet. - I Just wished everyone got a happy ending. You know, an ending picture with Kirino and Mishima with their partners. That Ideal BL manga story, but this is so similar to real life, and it just completely broke my fragile heart
The Specific Heat Capacity of Love
physically and emotionally hURTING i’m fckin sobbing and i can’t really see my screen as i’m typing the tears won’t stop and now i have boogies too so fucking sad oh gOD i will never read this again because the pain is too much, i’ll unfortunately remember this for awhile. crying again because i just remembered the story 3/6/21
Toumei na Ai no Utsuwa
7/1/21 i’ve been reading this since july of last year. i knew it was gonna hurt from the beginning but damn it still got me and now the tears have fallen Shiro… i’m heartbroken and i’m feeling so damn much for miki chapter 5 was heartbreaking tears are swelling around my eyes so i can barely see what i’m typing. i hope ch5 was not the last chapter oh god that was so sad so sad yet so beautiful
Sweet Home
omfggg amazing storyline !! i cried at then end, it’s freakin sadddd but omggg the ending is worth the tears! i love all the characters and i can’t believe i finished reading this :(( 12/24/20
The Paper Plane Which Is Under The Rainbow
1/16/21 8/8/24 that tragedy tag ain’t lying. that last panel got me … sad, didn’t want to see that :(( “I'm no exceptional being...I judge / loathe / swear pretty easily. That's how any other "normal" being is, around me. "They swear with words, they themselves can't understand" All these slurs / slangs for nothing. Just mere meaningless words that shroud the eyes and poison the heart.”
Into the Rose Garden
4/6/23 ch2: damn is that aelock teyvwind in ch1 !? wth happened to him that made him fall from his noble title?! let’s keep reading ch7: omggg is that what his sin was?!?!! he paid someone to do something to the fiancé omfg ch8: damn, everyone is actually kinda trash in this except the poor omega who got killed :/ ch9: soooo klopp did like aelock but second guessed himself bc of his low status plus aelock being an alpha, made him think he didn’t have a chance :/ damn aelock shot his shot and freaking klopp turned him down in a nasty way :( ch10: DAMNN WTFF why you slapping him like that klopp i still hate everyone tho ch11: WTFFFFF they fckin. BIG SIGH. i hate klopp but i’m also hating aelock cause he’s not innocent in this. yea he’s going thru shit rn and that makes me feel bad for him but he did put a hit on someone pregnant.. someone’s comment: The revenge didn’t really do anything but hurt more people, this was the sad reality to it. We only see it in both Aelock and Klopp’s eyes, but if you see it as whole, all of that was just Klopp playing God. I understand that Klopp was angry, but because he took justice on his hands, he deprived Rayfiel’s family any real closure. And if they learn he replaced their dead son and grandkid with products of rape, it will only make everything worst. It wasn’t a tribute but an insult to Rayfiel’s memory. The children if they one day knew the truth about their birth mother’s fate, the trauma that Klopp inflicts on them is irreparable. Aelock may be Klopp’s enemy, but he was still their mother. And they do find out the truth… We can’t control anger at its worst, so Klopp is blinded by revenge to bring Aelock down. But after Aelock’s return, it wasn’t revenge anymore, just Klopp’s conquest to destroy Aelock’s remaining dignity. So it was clear it was never about Rayfiel and just some twisted sick obsession for Aelock. It’s tragic how both of them got destroyed by Rayfiel’s death, but Klopp really went too far. It’s a really sad story of a monster and his self made devil. Admittedly, Klopp didn’t stop humiliating and taunting Aelock, rejecting aelock should have enough, did Klopp need to be so unnecessarily cruel? He kept jabbing at aelock for liking him. So he was partly responsible. I know it sounds like victim blaming, but reading this whole book made me see that Klopp really screwed up. I wish he would have just been honest with what he wanted. Or just avoided Aelock, moved on with his life. I know he was frustrated with his lingering attraction for Aelock, but he shouldn’t have vented that irritation on Aelock. He should have focused on Rayfiel. Even in this arc, Klopp was really rude. Aelock complimented him, and he hurled insults instead. He painted Aelock’s every action as something deviant. I was really disappointed with Klopp, he was portrayed as a confident, intelligent, loving man before the tragedy, but the man I saw was a prideful, selfish, arrogant coward. It’s a good story and you’ll grow attached to the characters, but you can see who the problem is… and unfortunately it wasn’t Aelock.
Searching for Stars in the Northern Sky
2/4/25: i knew something was gonna happen to his son. The way the beginning was set up was def a death flag:(( the lil teddy was so cute but he also had his grief to deal with i feel so bad for him. in the end, both the dad and the lil polar bear lean on each other and will stay be other’s side from now on. i definitely cried reading this. whenever the dad was showing the constellations.. oh man that just got to me and is making me tear up again as i write this
Darkness Before The Dawn