MWN's manga / #smut(210)

Starting this I thought that it was too much for me. I saw this on tumblr and the particular mangacap was tagged as exhibitionism, which is pretty much why I started it. I didn't not expect the level of fuckery I got. There's rape in this. Just letting you know, as a content warning. And not the usual yaoi rape, where the uke doesn't want it at first, but is just made out to be playing hard to get, and the sex ends up being cutesy even if problematic. No, there is real traumatizing rape in this. It was hard for me to read. Even now I don't know how to feel about this. I'm glad Hyeongjo realizes what he did is wrong and that their relationship went from toxic to a bit healthier, but I can't say that I completely support them. Like it was absolutely horrible and vile, how he treated him, and I couldn't just look past it as "consensual nonconsent" like I sometimes do in these yaoi. It was bad. And the worse part is that I love hardcore sex. I love bdsm. And I love yaoi that include them. But sex and bdsm are consensual and this.... was not. At all. It was just abuse and rape and traumatizing. This was a really hard read, but I don't completely regret it. It still had a pretty good storyline and I'm happy if they're happy in the end, after all of that. I'm glad that he apologized, and understands what he did was wrong. I'm happy for them and I want to support them. But I'm also hella conflicted here.