雨's Things

I caught my mom cheating on my dad when I was 11 or 12. My dad was away for work for two weeks, going to the countryside. Whenever he was away for that long, especially in the countryside, he would leave his touchscreen phone and only bring his Nokia phone.

I was in the living room when I heard my mom talking to someone. She was in her room (the walls were kind of thin). She was speaking in a very soft, low voice, which weirded me out because she would usually talk loudly when speaking to someone. I didn’t think much of it at first and continued watching TV, but then it happened again. So, I decided to check who she was talking to by climbing up on a piece of furniture (I don’t know what it’s called in English). There was a hole at the top of the wall, and I peeked through. I got a glimpse of who she was talking to, and it was a man who was definitely not my dad. I could only see the man's forehead and his eyes. He was lying sideways and wrapped in a blanket. There was even one time when she went completely naked in front of the phone in the kitchen.

There was a time when my dad and mom had a fight. I think my dad suspected she was cheating on him. I don’t remember if this happened before or after I found out that she actually was.

Months later, maybe, my mom got invited to a class reunion at the beach. My dad made me go with her. I saw that man again. It turned out they were classmates and childhood friends. I heard he used to like her, and maybe they used to like each other during their school days.

whenever my mom's phone was left alone, I had begun to check her messaging app to look for any DMs between her and that man. But when I checked, there was nothing—she must have deleted the conversation.

Years later, maybe in 2019, I was using her phone and saw someone on her messenger nicknamed "" (an alien emoji in case MGG doesn't allow the emoji). Again, it was that man. I don't remember what their conversation was about, but the only thing I can remember is checking his Facebook profile and finding that he was a married man with two kids who looked about 8 years old.

Wtf were they doing, and how could they keep this up for years? My mom barely leaves home, and when she does, she is usually with my dad—or with me, dad, and her together. That man lives across the country, so they've just been cheating using Facebook Messenger. They kept this shit up even after her and dad were finally able to conceive a child (in 2017)(dad passed away in 2018) (They aren't my bio parents; they were my aunt and uncle, but since they raised me, they were like my parents.)

late 2019, I think my mom completely stopped talking to him after that.

For whatever reason, I never told my dad about it—or anyone else. I don’t ever plan to confront her about it.

Is it weird to get over the death of a loved one so quickly? [long story.]

My dad passed away in 2018 due to cardiac arrest. They said he was feeling better and more energetic, and he was supposed to undergo surgery in the morning, but he suddenly passed away later that night.

It had been about two weeks since I last saw him (kids weren’t allowed in the hospital). When I first heard he passed, I didn’t feel an inkling of sadness. I stayed up in my room with my phone, which wasn’t unusual. I think I was reading a Wattpad story at the time. (I wasn’t at home—I was at my dad's little brother's in-laws' house.) It’s not that he was a terrible dad or that I didn’t love him. I was actually a certified daddy’s girl. He would wake up early to cook a proper meal, comb my hair, cut my nails, pick me up and drop me off at school, give me what I wanted, and bond with me over action movies. Whenever I fought with my mom, he was always on my side—except when he thought I was being too much. He pretty much did all the housework: cooking, cleaning, and laundry (by hand). I don’t know what his job was; I remember him mining for treasure or something. I’m pretty sure he didn’t work for a company, maybe it was illegal mining. I remember he used to take me to places with huge dug-up holes, where a bunch of men talked about gold and poisonous water or air. I don’t know where he got the money. Anyway, I guess he was kind of a househusband. My mom would sometimes help with cooking, but only at night. I think my mom might have been depressed at the time, staying cooped up at home watching TV or on her phon not sure.

Back to the main topic—so you know that stupid question parents ask: "If Mommy or Daddy separated, who would you choose to go with?” I’d always say I choose my dad, even though we weren’t blood-related. But back then, I never thought about blood relations. also, between my mom and dad, I was more scared of my dad because he was always calm. My mom, however, had a short fuse, and we’d often have fights. I got used to her temper, and we weren’t really on good terms.

My dad's friend (who worked with him) was a family friend. If my dad couldn’t pick me up, he would. At events or family outings, he was always there, even on ordinary days. His daughter, who was much older than me, would sometimes babysit me. On New Year’s Eve in 2015, he passed away in a motorcycle accident after colliding with another drunk driver while on his way home with his daughter. That night, another family friend broke the news to us, and I remember bawling my eyes out. (Looking back, I don’t understand why I cried so hard. My only memory of him was a time he made me uncomfortable during a family swimming outing—I’m pretty sure it was my first time meeting him.) At his wake, I didn’t cry and refused to look at him in the coffin, and I left after an hour. I wasn’t there for the burial.

Now back to my dad. At his wake, I didn’t feel anything emotional. Seeing him in the coffin, I felt nothing again. I just stayed on my phone watching *Beyond the Boundary* on YouTube.

At the burial, when I watched the coffin slowly lower into the ground, that was when I finally shed a few tears—but it only lasted a minute.

I always thought it was strange that I felt so much emotion when my dad’s friend passed, but I couldn’t do the same for my dad. I moved on within minutes. The last time I visited his grave was in 2019, and even now, my mom still thinks I’m depressed over his death. But over the years, I haven’t missed him at all.

[“Even though we weren’t blood-related”: My mom and dad aren’t actually my biological parents—they are my aunt and uncle. My bio mom, whom I call Mama, is my mom’s younger sister. She was 17 or 18 when she had me. The guy who got her pregnant said he’d take responsibility, but she ran away and went with my mom and dad, who were moving to another region of the country. They took my bio mom in, and after she gave birth, she resumed college with their support. She was mostly away while my mom and dad raised me. She came home for special occasions or college breaks. Even after graduating and getting a decent job, I still lived with my mom and dad, though she began supporting me financially.]

y'all, is it valid for me to feel disappointed in a friend who got pregnant? she was always like, "oh lol, i'm studying first," "i got no time for a boyfriend, study first." then, like a few months later, i find out that she's pregnant? i didn't even know that she had a boyfriend. tf, i don't know. i kind of feel disappointed because i thought she was not that type of girl who would give herself away just like that.

they were poor; she knows that, so i thought she knew better than to be reckless like the other young girls here who don't think about themselves and their living situation. the men who impregnate them don’t even take responsibility or will half-assedly do it, so i thought she was responsible enough not to end up like the girls here who were getting pregnant irresponsibly.

she dropped out of school (we were so close graduate hs), and after a few months, we stopped communicating. this was on my part; she was always the one reaching out to me, and i gave little to no effort in maintaining that friendship.

well, this was like two years ago when schools here finally opened because the pandemic had calmed down. it's a long time ago, but from time to time, i suddenly think about it, and i need some peace of mind about it, just be real.

There's this neighbor who is an old dude who has recently started giving us food, probably about four times now. His excuse would be that he cooked too much. Just now, I went out to feed some stray cats with my leftovers from my lunch box. The old man's apartment door was opened, so he saw me go out, and then he called me over and said to get his green bowl that he used to give us food. He said he'd give us food, and I said, “Oh no, but we've already eaten," so he said, "Ah, okay." After giving the cats food, I went back in and took the green bowl to return it to the old man's because I forgot to return it and was just reminded about it after talking to him, but then he said there's no need to return it. Then he randomly gave me money, saying it's money to commute to school. I refused, but he kept on insisting I keep the money. I couldn't do shit anymore, so I kind of just accepted it, and he went back inside his apartment, but my mom heard all that, so she took the money from me and gave it back to the old guy.

I'm kind of creeped out by this because, absolutely, why? I also think the guy is just being genuine, because what if, idk, he just misses his kids or grandchild and is just taking it all out on us, and him being a creep is all in my head? I think all those true crime videos and podcasts I listened to are getting to me and probably giving me paranoia or some shit.
 
BTW, he lives alone, but when I get home from school, sometimes I see a guy in a school uniform (I don't know which school his from because there aren't any logos on his uniform) come out of the apartment. But the old man wouldn't be home.

So, previous uploader of Blind Play (a.k.a Ejaculatetoyaoi https://www.mangago.me/home/people/1266644/home/ ) is catfishing?
https://twitter.com/anthonyngo/status/1417742754361270272?s=19

Lmao, glad never defended them.
That's why they were so cocky and not getting scared about their so called face being exposed on the internet while being an illegal uploader