What she's doing is defs not right but I kinda get what she's feeling - that amalgamation of satisfaction, empowerment and slight guilt in knowing that you can have that kind of effect on someone else. There's also that aspect of wanting to hide your mortification at not being able to make it work with a guy and you want to show how unaffected you are to the people around you. At that point, you're not really thinking about how the other person feels. And the fact that the author is able to evoke this sense of verisimilitude within me makes me really enjoy this :)
Bruh how can this still be such a tease when she's literally having sex with him?