banana's Favorite

Since I wrote this as a reply to a comment, might as well share for others. How did it get this long? Σ( ￣□￣||) HUGE SPOILER (READ AT OWN RISK!):










So basically this is a story about reincarnation. Long ago there are 3 Children of God (children who are loved and blessed by God). 1st child who killed his lover. 2nd child who killed her son. 3rd child who killed his parents. Because of their sin, all 3 were cursed by God to reincarnate with dark mana (or dark magic within) and remember their past lives. Once they remember their lives, they will repeat their sins. 1st child will fall in love, remember his lover and kill his lover again. 2nd child will love her child, remember her past and kill her child. 3rd will do the same for his parents. They repeat countless reincarnation like this, basically living in torment for their guilt by killing their loved ones. As you can guess, the 2nd child is our MC Aisha (I think she's the great saintess from 500 years ago who was said will be reborn again), and Abel is the soul of her child she will end up killing if she ever remembers her past due to the curse. The medication MC is taking (as seen in the webtoon) is given to suppress her power and memory so she wouldn't remember. The one supplying this medication is a priest from the temple name Mikhail/Michael (?), who is the 1st cursed child of God. And as may suspect, our MC is his past lover. Michael is planning to kill MC before he falls in love with her again so that he won't suffer the pain of killing a loved one again. The reason why MC killed her child long ago was bcuz her child was in pain/sick and she couldn't help bear to watch him suffer, so to end her child's pain, she killed him. As for the 1st child of God, he himself couldn't remember why he killed his own lover. The 3rd child of God however, watching the 2 suffer from their sins, he tried to break the curse by killing the God himself but he didn't succeed (and ended up getting cursed too, with killing a parent curse). The 3rd child of God was the most favoured and he has the power to Procreate/Create life, so he ended up creating the world for the 2 other child of God hoping for them to break the curse so they all can be free (so basically the 3rd child is the author of the book MC read).


Our poor MC will start stopping taking her medication and that's when her power and memory slowly coming back (she had both black magic and white magic in her body). That's when she realize that she will end up killing Abel if this goes on. She will want to break their engagement and ask ML to kill her bcuz she couldn't kill herself as the curse will rebound any effort of self mutilation. Oh and also she was Janes (in her past life before she dies and got reincarnated and transmigrated into current body, Aisha), the person who guided ML to save the then orphaned Abel. MC as Janes, pleaded to ML to take good care of Abel and for him to promise her to kill anyone who will come to him in the future saying that they remembered their past lives. And ML promised Janes.


And in the current timeline, after MC remembers this, she asks ML to uphold that promise. ML is totally livid and their conversation is so heart breaking. ML refused, but MC said that with the curse she won't be able to stop herself from killing Abel, and she kept apologizing to ML for dragging him into this mess of a fate. She also said that now she had black magic, she could even control ML's mind (as black magic can brainwash people) if she wants (kind of hinting she might command him to kill her using that method if he continues to refuse), but ML kept refusing and hoping they find a way to break the curse together. ╥﹏╥

Anyway, since the spoiler is incomplete and I don't have all the details, some things happened and it's happy ending! They managed to break the curse and finally all three children of God can live in peace. MC and ML got to have their happy ending with Abel, creating a happy family.

I’m gonna big spoil. Really big so if you want just some little spoil or something, don’t read it.
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Okay, here we go. The manhwa could have a different ending than the novel, but I’ll be talking about the novel here. And I didn’t read the novel btw. I’ve just read a biiig summary in japanese, that I’m summarizing into this spoil.
This is tagged as « Romance », just as the novel. But y’all have to know it’s actually not a romance one. It’s wayyy more than that, for the first time in that kind of isekai there’s NO ML. We’re just gonna see the character growing up, and I’m actually so happy because of that ヾ(☆▽☆) We all like romance but dang, it’s about HER, SHE’S growing up, without the need of a boyfriend and that’s just amazing. Anyways let’s really start with the spoil now

So, as we saw, the MC will die. A magician will make Keira return to the past, ‘cause she’s « the real one ».
> The real villain of the story isn’t Cosette. It’s the dad, what an @sshole (But he’s hella hot. Still hate him af tho, but ugh why does he kinda look like Claude, and why does Cosette kinda looks like Athy, it makes me even more angry and confused. Don’t make them look like thiiis)
>>> When Keira died ; The dad will help the magician, because of his guilt (? or maybe just because he realized SHE was the real one loved by spirits. A trashy reason for a trash, it makes sense to me.)
>> There’s a thing about the dad being hypnotized, I didn’t really understood that part. But it’s not really important, cause he DID a lot of things, and killed Keira even though he knew she was his daughter (he knew it and wasn’t hypnotized. He still voted to kill her, I’m not sure why but he probably didn’t care since Cosette had the power, and so they thought she was loved by the spirits, « she have power so I don’t need you, just die » grrr)
When the MC returns to the past, the dad start to have some nightmares (of the futur, when he kill his own daughter and all. When he wakes up, he don’t really remember the nightmare and only remember the pain (be in pain yeah, you killed her you trash. And that’s not the only thing he did btw.)
-> Actually, the truth is that he never did directly something, like Cosette. (Well, he voted to kill his daughter, but he didn’t plot or anything) But the thing is that his action, his being, made sooo many people suffer. He destroyed everyone close to him. HE caused everything.
His first wife, for exemple. He watched her being insulted, abused, and never stood to her or said anything, which made the abuse even worst.
> The abuse was done by the family of the second wife, the mother of Keira.
He never said anything, ignored it all. And even when the family of the second wife hired assassins to kill the first one, he didn’t do anything, didn’t say anything, while he knew everything.
The first wife was slandered of being infertile (while she wasn’t). She was pregnant, of Cosette (Which means that yeah, Cosette is a real daughter too. That’s why she looks so much like the dad). And in her situation, to save her baby, she made a contract with a Demon, offering her soul to protect her baby and take revenge of the Parvis family (the one Keira came from), but what she didn’t knew is that she was pregnant of twins (a girl, Cosette, and a boy) >> I’m not sure about this part. The summary does talk about twins (« I didn’t know they were twins ») ; it’s either about the babies, so Cosette and a boy, or about the mother and her brother (cause she do have a brother, we’ll talk about it after)

The Demon took possession of the body of the first wife, and by doing so, killed the baby (Cosette). So actually, Cosette never lived, she was dead from the start ; which complete the prophecy, saying that only ONE daughter is the saintess.
Now, about Cosette (well, it’s not really her. It’s the Demon, in her body, while she’s dead (while she actually was never born alive), controlling the divine spirit ; that’s a little bit confusing. It’s not really clear if Cosette stole the spirit when Keira successfully invoked it and could control it because of her royal blood, or if it’s just the magic of the demon, and actually Cosette never had the water spirit ; Keira had it, but was so shocked that she saw Cosette using her magic (that look just like the spirit), that she never thought she successfully invoked it. She thought Cosette had it and so never awoken her power. It’s one of them either way, but I think it’s the second one, not sure tho this part is so confusing.

Now, the brother of the first wife ; he’s the only one of their family that survived. He wants to take revenge of the Parvis family, just like his sister. He’s the one who introduced Cosette, and he also made a contract with a Demon. In the first futur, their revenge was successful when Keira died, and life turned into Hell (must be why the magician and father returned to the past where Keira was alive)

In this timeline, the father’s way too different. Not as cold, wants to be treated as a father (a b/tch I’m saying, grrr)

The ending ; okay, now let’s talk about how different it’ll of what you expect
I know you expect her to be with a boy, and her father loving her. It’s not. Not at all.
As I said, there’s no ML ; no Romance as we know it. But she’s loving herself. Taking care of herself. Romance with herself lmao

>> She and her brother COMPLETELY cut ties with their father. They’re gonna explore the world, which they could never did (they were kinda locked up in the house since their childhood, because of their father.) It’s not like WMMAP or any manhwa where they end up liking their toxic father and all.


I seriously find it beautiful. Way more « realistic », isn’t it ? I kinda always hoped for an isekai/return to the past where the girl doesn’t live for love u know ? Where she lives for herself. And there it is. (there is some not about romance, but the MC is always a boy. Now we have some THIS same style, but with an heroine that really do it for herself you know ? She find herself, her own happiness which doesn’t imply a boy or a love life ; just her, and her brother, after cutting tie with the toxicity in her life)

I also want Venus to slap me with a stack of papers.

BUT!

I need someone to comfort me after, and Felix just doesnt do that for me so Eusto takes that position.

I read this quite awhile ago so let’s see if i remember correctly or pls correct me if i’m wrong

















This manhua is not suitable for you if ure pretty impatient bcus there’s kinda bit of a slow burn there (i forgot their names lol cause i read too many manhuas but i still remember their faces) It will happened too far away that Trashta will ended up insane and lost everything after the emperor find out her true disgusting sude.

Later in the novel, Trashta gave birth to a daughter but lil bit sooner the arsehole emperor find out that the daughter is in fact not his,it was some other man’s (i think a baron’s son where trashta used work as a slave) he find out when he is doing a dna test.

Also, Navier will become henry(is that his name? because in hangul it spells heinli)’s empress, everyone thought including herself,is infertile but turns out she will be pregnant with the ml’s child and the kingdom rejoice but when the news reached the arsehole’s ex husband’s news he is shocked because then.... he slept with both women but none of them were his child so he IS the one unable to provide an heir-he is the one infertile.


AAANND I BET YALL WILL LIKE THIS PART,
the arsehole emperor will be so lost without Navier,he is sad ever since she left the empire. He will even bought a painting of him and her when they went on a picnic—the seller said it is a high price —but he couldn’t care less, he will buy it no matter how exp it is. Then he put it up in his personal chamber, he wept and talk to the navier on the painting as if she could hear him. He was like ‘Where are you looking at my queen?” (cause in the painting navier was looking away)

I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD..........IF I WAKE UP TOMORROW AND IT'S NOT DECEMBER I'M RIOTING.......i need to see more of that ass

If you pay attention to the images our painter produces from the moment the painter Baek Na Kyum (BNK) is living with Yoon Seungho (SH), you will notice two things:
1. the small changes in his paintings showing the growing attraction to the lord and the evolution of their relationship
2. our painter’s state of mind and personality
The first painting BNK created was this one.
http://www.mangago.zone/read-manga/yahwacheop/uu/yahwacheop-chapter-3/10/

It was never finished as the painter destroyed it out of shame and guilt. He has been influenced by his teacher that sodomy and the paintings are vulgar and immoral. Striking are SH’s face and gaze. In the former paintings created by our main character, we saw that the people involved in the erotic images had no individual face. There is a simple explanation for this: our painter had no model. He could only create these paintings through his imagination. That's why he is shown drawing sodomy outdoors.

http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5539284/

However, the beholder can sense that even these paintings, like the one published, ooze warmth and love, since this image was not created as a sex manual. Yet we could barely see a face. The facial expression, especially the gaze, is quite vague. Yet in the first picture above, NK not only painted real SH’s face but he was able to catch the lord’s inner thoughts as well: SH is attracted to NK, he is showing some lust because the gaze is aiming at the painter. Notice the contrast, his partner Jihwa is only shown from the side with closed eyes illustrating the lack of interest of the painter for the partner. In other words, the first painting reveals the attraction between Yoon Seungho and Baek Na-Kyum. This explains why our painter destroys it afterwards because this would be an admission that BNK is a sodomite, that his love for In Hun is somehow tarnished and that SH’s presence affects him greatly. It also would mean that BNK broke the promise he made to his teacher… he is somehow convinced that all is vulgar and dirty. On the other hand, this explains why SH is actually happy with the work, although our innocent man ruined it. The master does feel attracted to BNK, he has witnessed NK’s reaction while painting. That’s why he asked the painter later while trying to seduce him with his gaze if BNK wanted to join them as well.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5275202/

This happened during the second session. However, BNK showed some disgust which displeased SH. In this particular scene, the reader witnessed for the second time the effect of In hun’s brainwashing on BNK. The latter has been denying his own sexuality: he is attracted to men.

Then in the second one, it is almost the same.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5276125/
We don’t see the face of his partners, only Seungho’s face is directed to the painter. Actually, our seme is looking straight in the eyes of the painter. Here again, SH is in the center of the picture. Just like the first one, the image outlines the attraction and sexual tension between our seme and the uke. It was as if the painter was making love to the seme through his picture… However, they don’t touch each other. That’s why SH’s urge to have sex with BNK is getting stronger, as he wants to taste him for real.

Nevertheless, this painting gets damaged by Jihwa. The latter wanted to get revenge on behalf of one of Seungho’s sex partner because the latter had complained that the lord didn’t focus on him as they were about to have sex. He felt that the lord’s gaze was always on the painter and not on him. Striking is that shortly after Jihwa visits our seme for another sex session. After the appearance of our painter, Jihwa made a similar experience… he also observed how the lord would keep looking at Baek Na Kyum. Contrary to the behavior of the former seme, Jihwa decided to catch Seungho’s attention by using an unique sexual position he saw in a different painting. Jihwa’s action did affect Seungho but it was short lived as the lord left Jihwa’s side in order to see what the painter had accomplished so far. Jihwa couldn’t even keep him by his side. Notwithstanding at the end of the sex session, the lord pays no attention to the uke, he returns straight to the painter’s side. He doesn’t even bid goodbye to Jihwa which irritates the uke a lot.

http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5539287/
In the third painting, this time Seungho’s gaze is not directed at the painter. This can be elucidate quite simply. It reflects Jihwa’s action, the latter used an unusual position to catch the lord’s attention and gaze. The painter did picture the reality. However, the beholder can observe the similarities between this picture and the formers. Only Seungho’s gaze is painted, all the others have their eyes closed or their face is not painted. On the other hand, this painting reflects a progression. Our lord’s body is getting more and more exposed. While in the first two paintings, the viewer could only see a part of his body, here Seungho is painted entirely. We feel that the distance between our seme and the painter is reduced.

The fourth painting is interesting as it shows the change in the relationship between BNK and Seungho.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5275455/

chapter 25: For the first time, the painter and the lord appear together in a painting
Both are now physically close, the painter is now in the picture… even in the center of the picture which reveals two aspects:
-BNK is now admitting that he masturbates, that he likes being touched by a man, he is reacting to SH’s touch…
– However what catches the attention of the viewer is that BNK hasn’t drawn his own face. There are many reasons why he did it so. First, he wants to remain anonymous… which reflects his own denying. He doesn’t want to show his homosexuality, his attraction to SH. Secondly, he doesn’s know his own reaction as he has never seen himself while doing such a thing. And this explains why Seungho puts BNK in front of a mirror and let him see his own reactions. Seungho wants him to witness his own pleasure and would like him to admit that he likes having sex with Seungho. Furthermore, it shows an underlying aspect: his own low self-esteem. In his mind, he doesn’t consider himself worthy to be painted. This will clearly shown in the last painting. Sure, his first worry in the 3rd painting is that he doesn’t want to be recognized in the picture as he wants his relationship with master Yoon to remain secret. He doesn’t want the teacher to know the truth. Seungho’s face is still the same: longing, sexual tension, lust and warmth. It was as if Seungho was protecting the painter… he sits behind him. This also explains why SH proposed to do it this way. He knew that he couldn’t sleep with the painter right away. He had to lower his inner walls.

Another important painting appears in the episode 40 contrasting to all the former pictures. First, the topic of the drawing is different. It is not about about erotic and sodomy but about an inauguration.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5275483/

Here, the topic of the painting is the ceremony of In Hun who receives a high position. Notice the contrast between the former image and this painting. In Hun is sitting while the crowd is standing indicating his “noble” position. Besides, he stands above all the crowd, it was as if he was unreachable. Among the crowd, you can observe BNK who is portrayed again with no face. And this is no coincidence. You can only recognize him by the clothes. The way BNK and In Hun are standing to each other points out the gap between him and the teacher. There is still this respect and high regard for the noble… he considers himself so lowly, as if he was not important. He is not worthy being mentioned, hence he remains anonymous. However we shouldn’t forget that he is the creator of this work. This also mirrors In Hun’s point of view indirectly, yet BNK is not aware of it. It outlines that BNK has internalized In Hun’s mentality. It proves that BNK keeps having this false perception of In Hun. Besides, this contrasts with all the other paintings with Seungho. The master showed respect to the painter, felt attraction and wanted to included him in the painting. As you can conclude, BNK has felt this all along but just unconsciously.
That’s why BNK will wrinkle the picture later after the confrontation. He is hurt and frustrated. He does resent his teacher. Later, he will admit to the lord his homosexuality he suppressed before and even concede that he did enjoy his night with him too. Yet simultaneously he has internalized In Hun’s values: he was born to be a prostitute which causes him a great suffering. At the end of the first season, Baek Na Kyum asks the servant Kim to throw away this painting, once he hears that the teacher left the mansion without saying goodbye to him. His gesture symbolizes that the painter is cutting off his ties and attachment to In Hun. He knows that he means nothing to In Hun.

After hearing from his learned sir that the latter only considers BNK as a prostitute because it has always been his destiny, our painter is so hurt that he keeps painting restlessly. All the pictures are inspired by every sexual experience Baek Na Kuym shared with Seungho. In the first drawing below, the beholder can recognize the first night, the sexual experience at the tailor shop, the day where Seungho spends the whole day with him after BNK had tried to run away, the blowjob after the rape.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5539294/

http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5539289/

What caught my attention was that all the paintings picturing Seungho with BNK (paintings in the chapter 41) have a common denominator: they lack details. We don’t see any intense and passionate gaze from the lord, the face of the uke is not even drawn. It was as if BNK was painting these pictures as a robot. They definitely lack warmth and love. BNK even paints the rape where the beholder sees tears falling on the drawing. Striking is that in that moment, BNK was crying due to In Hun’s harsh words. However, when he was forced to have sex with Seungho in that pavilion, our uke was also crying. So the tears can be linked to this event as well. Our uke is painting as he has finally resigned to his fate. He will do what Yoon Seungho is asking: paint but without any passion and lust. However, the painter has not realized that Seungho has stopped inviting his usual sex partners. The lord is no longer interested in the paintings, only in BNK’s affection and love. That’s why he gets upset when he sees the beautiful drawing of In Hun’s ceremony. It is full of details and well drawn as well, while his paintings with BNK are poorly made. He painted as many as possible which shows the lack of care and affection. In my opinion, these paintings symbolize Baek Na Kyum's loss of innocence. The warmth and love from the drawings shown in the beginning have disappeared. Some readers complained that BNk would cry too much, they would even call him a cry baby. But his behavior was to outline his purity and innocence. A "child" cries, when he is upset and hurt... BNK was definitely too naive and believed every word the teacher said to him. So the tears BNK has in the chapter 41-42 are the last tears in my opinion, hence he doesn't cry, when In Hun leaves him without saying goodbye. That's why he decides to get rid of the ceremony painting.

As conclusion, the paintings not only reflect the mental state of the painter but also the evolution in the relationship between the lord and the painter. Therefore I am looking forward for a future painting, where BNK admits everything and shows no embarrassment and where BNK confesses his love for Seungho. This means, a painting with Seungho and BNK’s own face, with the expression of love and pleasure. Imagine this: their love would be shown in a painting which could create a scandal: a noble like Seungho sleeping with a low-born painter.

That's it. Feel free to comment.

What caught my attention in the chapter 43 is the man with the green robe. His name is Min and just like Seungho, he is a noble. Here he is described by his friend with a black heart. Until now, he was shown in different chapters (like f. ex. in 33, 34, 41) but he was among others and as such, he was never properly introduced.However, his presence increased until the chapter 43 marking a pivotal moment. In my opinion, he will play a bigger part in the second season. But who is this man, what do we know about him?

But first let's go back to the chapter 41, where he was shown hunting with Seungho. This means that he is quite close to Seungho as the latter spends time with him outside the sex orgies. Striking is that in this chapter, the man with the green robe was tasting the water, when he asked Seungho to confirm the rumor about the incident at the tailor shop. Seungho warned him not to cross the line as he could share the same fate than Jihwa. During that scene, the author draw two pictures focused on the hands. The man with the green robe grabbed the wrist of our main lead and even put his other hand on his waist. And these pictures are not random as usual. Remember how Seungho reacted, when In Hun touched his shoulder, he was about to kill the teacher. And here, our main lead only pushes his hand and insults him by comparing the man with a mouse ("look at you, gathering up rumors like a mouse after crumps"). His gestures towards our seme revealed something in my opinion. The waist is a very intimate place. And it shows that he is interested in Seungho sexually. So it looks like this man wants to become Seungho's lover as well. But then why doesn't Jihwa feel threatened by him? Then remember that he grabbed Seunho's wrist. A man in Asia will usually grab his girlfriend's wrist. In other words, the man with the green robe is treating like a woman (the waist, the wrist) and it shows that he wants Seungho to be his uke. He is a seme, just like Seungho hence Jihwa never felt threatened by him. If I look back at the chapter 33 and 34, his sexual role is implied as he is smoking and still has his topknot down, just like Seungho, while the ukes in this scene have all their hair down. As conclusion, this man wants to have Seungho as lover, just like Jihwa, but in a different role. Furthermore, in the chapter 33, he was the one who asked Seungho to bring BNK to their sex party implying that he would like to taste him which Seungho refused. As conclusion, the lord Min is a seme interested in Seungho who considers BNK and Jihwa as rivals whom he needs to get rid of them. That's why he is paying attention to Seungho's move and is always updated about Seungho's interactions with the painter.

However, the chapter 43 reveals a lot of info about the master Min and his personality. The reader realize his dangerosity here. Why? First, it is revealed that this seme knew all along about Jihwa's feelings for Seungho and played him. He misled him so that Jihwa would run to Seungho's mansion because he was thinking that Seungho had been hurt by his brother's visit. He knew that Jihwa wouldn't be able to resist and run to the lord's mansion. He had already calculated that Jihwa would discover the truth and be hurt and realize his mistake. He even ridiculed Jihwa. He is quite similar to Seungho with his sarcasm and his ironical comments. He enjoys making fun of Jihwa and is as cunning as Seungho. I guess, that's why this man is attracted by Seungho.

Besides I can't help myself associating Min to a snake... he is like the devil, inciting the stupid Jihwa to commit a murder. I had suspected the man before as he was the one who even asked Seungho to bring the painter to one of their sex parties but it only became clear in this chapter. He wants to get rid of Jihwa and BNK as the same time. Both represent a thread. He is definitely using Jihwa so that if anything goes wrong, only Jihwa will be blamed. The man with the black heart tried to diminish the consequences of the murder. He said that the murder should look like an accident, hence this attempted murder can never happen at the mansion. They will wait until BNK leaves the mansion in order to buy some brushes and paper.

Now it becomes clear why the man with the black heart is doing such a thing. Although Min claims that he wants to be entertained, when he lied to Jihwa in the past, he has already prepared to set the trap for Jihwa. He knows where to hire the killer. He had already anticipated Jihwa's reaction. While Min declares that it is funny, when Jihwa came crying, he adds that he is disappointed that he only sees just tears. He wanted him to "come with his tail between his legs". And this outlines his cruelty. It was as if he was "castrated", had lost his masculinity and virility. As you can see, the guy is making fun of Jihwa and even insulting him. But the latter doesn't care and even doesn't see any danger coming from the man with the black heart.

But striking is that after Jihwa's arrival, he proposes right away to the noble to have BNK killed. But in order to convince Jihwa, he adds more fuel to the fire with his comments:
- Seungho has been bewitched
- at some point he will become Seungho's mistress
All this points out that the guy is manipulating Jihwa to ensure that the latter will decide to kill the lowborn. That's why we see Jihwa's imagination of that night. The words the man with the green robe said had a huge influence on him. Not only his mind is black but also his heart which outshines this man's evilness and dangerosity. Let us not forget that he is a seme...
Min is like a personification of the devil... his lies, his words in order to incite Jihwa to commit a crime, his words ridiculising Jihwa and even Seungho.

Due to his words and the color of his robe, master Min reminds me of the snake in the tree of knowledge of good and evil, the one who brought misery to Adam and Eva, here in this case this seme is leading Jihwa to his own demise. Striking is that this man persuades Jihwa that nothing will happen to him as BNK is a commoner and if this looks like an accident, then he won't get caught. And remember that Jihwa is a noble... and in the bible, God got aware of Adam's original sin hence he was banished from paradise. And in my opinion, this will occur to Jihwa, he will lose his title as noble as his crime will be discovered.

Finally, I would like to point out that Seungho compared Min to a mouse indicating that Seungho doesn't consider him as a thread, he sees Min even as harmless. A mouse is small and has no real claws. So either Seungho is underestimating him or Seungho is already aware of his real desire and moves hence he is not unprepared. He clearly warned him and this outlines that Seungho is not blind. He knew why Min asked him to bring the painter for their sex party and why the lord Min asked about the veracity of the rumor about the incident at the tailor shop. But I compared him to a snake due to his cunning behavior and his cynical and seductive words... in my opinion, Seungho is not entirely well prepared.

That's it. Feel free to comment.

In this analysis, I will compare two major scenes (chapters 20-21 versus chapters 41-42), which happened both in Baek Na-Kyum’s study and chamber. In this chamber, our main lead, Yoon Seungho, has sex with the painter BNK.

The moment the lord Yoon Seungho forced the painter to live in his mansion, the latter was sent to the room next to Yoon Seungho’s bedchamber. One of the reasons for this was that it was much easier for BNK to enter the lord’s chamber in order to paint the erotic scenes. However this also outlined the special status the noble gave him. The noble would have never let someone live close to him whom he didn’t trust. He knew that the painter represented no thread to him.

Now, you are wondering why these scenes should be compared to each other. First, both scenes mark a turning point in the relationship between the lord and the painter. Secondly, through the comparison, you get a better understanding of the chapter 42 and why it also illustrates a crucial moment for the painter, whereas the chapters 20-21 marked a pivotal moment for Yoon Seungho.

What caught my attention was the way both scenes showed so many parallels. Let us a take closer look:

1. both scenes were predated with an argument between the painter and the teacher Jung In-Hun. In the picture below, you can observe Seungho witnessed from far away how BNK got upset.
The lord can not hear the content of the conversation but he observes that BNK is hurt and upset due to the teacher. The latter has just discovered that the invitation and the support from Yoon Seungho has nothing to do with Jung In Hun’s abilities. Then he resents BNK. In the chapter 41, Yoon visits the painter’s study because he heard from the servants that BNK wouldn’t leave his room and would keep painting without eating much. As you can see, the lord pays a lot of attention to the mental health of the painter. He knows from the way BNK is acting that something is wrong. The reason for BNK’s strange behavior is that BNK had just heard before from Jung In Hun that he was born to be a prostitute. His love for In Hun was so pure and for the teacher, BNK was just a prostitute.

The quarrel started because BNK asked the teacher what would happen to him, once JIH would succeed the civil service examination. JIH refused to take any responsibility for BNK as he claimed that he was already experiencing a huge change and getting a lot of benefit from YSH. BNK had to hear from the one whom he admired the most that BNK was just a prostitute in his eyes. BNK was definitely hurt. Nonetheless, SEungho never witnessed their conversation, unlike in the chapter 19. And in this chapter (19), the rich lord knew that the expensive bottle of wine that had disappeared had been snatched by the painter due to his emotional state. Since YSH had already figured it out that the painter was upset, he decided to visit BNK’s chamber. In other words, in both cases, the lord showed some concern about the painter and wanted to keep an eye on him.

2. In both scenes, the painter made the first move on Seungho, which contrasts so much to BNK’s normal behavior. The latter has always kept pushing away the rich lord. He always tried to avoid his touch and even his gaze.

In the chapter 42, BNK didn’t kiss the lord right away, he asked Seungho first to hold him. However, there was no reaction from the lord, since BNK had yelled at the noble before which led Seungho to slap the painter for his disrespect. Unlike in the chapter 20-21, there was no quarrel between the lord and the painter… but there was a huge misunderstanding. BNK mistook YSH for the teacher and thought, Jung In Hun was visiting, hence he kissed him. Back then, he was under the influence of alcohol, yet this revealed his deepest wish. He wanted to confess his love for the teacher. Striking is that in both kisses, Seungho keeps his eyes opened.

In the chapter 20, he was surprised and shocked, in the other chapter he is uncertain about the kiss. He has no idea why the crying, visibly upset BNK is asking for his embrace. Nonetheless, BNK’s kisses did affect Seungho whom I have been described in another post as someone detached and emotionless. While he criticizes BNK’s kiss in the chapter 42, this would not arouse him, in the earlier chapter he made no complaint. He saw it as an opportunity to finally taste the painter. He was not annoyed by the lack of inexperience unlike in the chapter 42. However, both kisses have something in common. Both outline BNK’s innocence and purity. These kisses are not here to excite the partner but to express a deep and pure love (chapter 19) or to ask for warmth and comfort (chapter 42).

3. The other similarity is the presence of Jung In Hun in that chamber, although the teacher is not physically there. In the chapter 19, the love confession BNK made was actually addressed to Jung In Hun and not Seungho. Furthermore, BNK kept calling Seungho “my learned sir” and that’s how the painter used to call his beloved teacher. Since BNK was drunk, he mistook the wealthy lord for his loved one. I would even say that BNK is actually imagining JIH’s presence. He is not really seeing the teacher as the author gave us a few pictures from BNK’s perspective. It was as if he wished, the teacher would be there. He drank so much in order to drown his sorrows but to be more precise, he drank in order to escape from reality, like he was in ecstasy. He preferred living in an illusion than facing the reality that the teacher has never loved him and will never loved him. For BNK, this night is like a dream. In other words, this night where BNK lost his virginity was an illusion and a dream. That’s why at the end, he cried out of happiness and even told Seungho that he was happy. But for Seungho, this night had another signification. First, he thought that it wasn’t too bad if BNK mistook him for JIH as he could finally taste the painter. However, as time passed on, he could no longer bear hearing from BNK “learned sir” hence he proposed BNK to call him “lord”. As you can see, the shadow of JIH in the room did bother Seungho. And for Seungho, this night in the chapter marked a pivotal moment as well. He heard a pure and innocent love confession and at the end, when BNK told him that he was so happy and his heart was full, Seungho’s heart was moved and touched. I doubt that Seungho had ever heard before that he could make someone happy. Since BNK had kept his virginity intact for his loved one and confessed to Seungho indirectly, this night gives the readers the impression of a wedding night. Back then, the husband usually joined the bride much later. But the problem here is that all this was also an illusion and a dream for Seungho as everything said and done was addressed to the learnt sir and not to our main lead. This explains why our seme is looking for a renewal of this night later.

As I had mentioned before, in both scenes the readers felt the presence of In Hun in this chamber. In the chapter 42, his shadow is indicated by the drawing,


Notice Seungho’s reaction: his gaze shows his displeasure and shock.
Although BNk is kissing him and even asking him to embrace him, the lord refuses and becomes even angry at BNK. He doesn’t want to become intimate with the painter because this is related to Jung In Hun. Our seme is even quite brutal and even grabs BNK’s hair. He even criticizes BNK’s kiss saying that with such a move he can not be excited. But this rejection from the lord doesn’t even upset the painter, hence he becomes more proactive. He grabs Seungho’s loin, undresses himself, he would have sex with the seme without any preparation. The lord is actually surprised by BNK’s actions because this doesn’t resemble him at all. He acts as a prostitute that’s why Seungho asks if the teacher has talked the painter into it.
But by comparing these two scenes, I noticed some differences as well. We can observe a huge contrast between these two scenes. While earlier, Seungho was just looking for sex, he found love or better said, he tasted the illusion of love and enjoyed it very much. BNK was a virgin, totally inexperienced and innocent who asked the noble to be careful with him. And in the chapter 42, the opposite is happening. BNK is actually acting like a prostitute... it was as if he was looking for sex but this is not what Seungho wants. I say prostitute because BNK is acting as if he was doing a job and not seeking love and affection. He considers himself as a prostitute as he has received support from the lord all this time and he thinks that Seungho has always perceived him as such. There is no seduction in this scene as BNK has been "forced to prostitution". Actually, the painter's words contradict his words and his actions. He doesn't say that he wants sex because he keeps begging for the lord's embrace. Being hold is connected to warmth and affection. And here, the reader can feel the pain and despair from the painter. Jung In Hun's words ("you are born as a prostitute") are still in his mind. Here, BNK is doing the exact opposite of the night in the chapter 20. He is no longer running away from the reality and living in an illusion, BNK wants to face the reality. The slap from Seungho should be considered as a wake up call. Baek Na-Kyum can not ignore the lord's status, he can not mistake him for someone equal to him. In both scenes, BNK overlooked the lord and this is not what Seungho wants. He wants to be perceived as the person he is: a lord who worries about the painter.

Then in order to underline the contrast between both scenes, while their first night took place during the night, the kiss in the chapter 42 happens during the day. As you can see, the time reinforces the idea of illusion (chapter 20-21) and of reality (chapter 41-42). So since BNK is facing reality, he has decided to follow his lord’s orders (painting erotic pictures) and he acts as a prostitute because he really believes what Jung In Hun said before. He is taking the teacher’s words as face value, while in reality Jung In Hun has no idea that Seungho is treating BNK as a lover and even “wife”. Back then, it was a custom that the lord visits the chamber of the wife and concubine. But BNK is not really aware of all this. And just like in the chapter 20, Seungho is annoyed and even jealous of the place In Hun has in BNK’s mind and heart.

Striking is that even in the chapter 42, their first night is even mentioned. The painter confesses that he did enjoy the night, he even concedes that he likes painting such erotic pictures. Since he is facing reality, BNK admits for the first time his homosexuality which had been suppressed by the teacher all this time. But at the same time, he is admitting that he is a prostitute which is shown through his actions. However, he can’t even say this to the lord. What caught my attention was the contrast between these scenes when it comes to eloquence. Although BNK was drunk in the chapter 20-21, his confession was well spoken (“I admire you”, “I pine for you”), in the chapter 42 he is neither sick nor drunk, yet he is unable to talk properly. He stutters and can’t even finish his sentences “I’m… a …”). The pain is so strong that he is left speechless.

He is so hurt that he wants to have rough sex (“harder”, “so it’s all the way in”). He wants to be physically hurt so that he can no longer feel any pain in his heart. It was as if he wanted to erase the words In Hun spoke from his mind. Hence he says “So I can’t think of anything else”. Strangely, BNK’s gesture and position show the change in their relationship. He is now facing the lord, he even grabs the noble’s hand and puts it on his stomach. It is such an intimate gesture outlining that this is much more than senseless sex. BNK has not realized the contradiction between his words (“harder”/ “to hold me”) and his actions (grabbing his loin/putting the hand on his stomach). We can see that BNK is actually lost and confused.

However, just like the night from the chapter 20 changed everything for Seungho, this night changes everything as BNK is no longer running away from reality. He is no longer suppressing his homosexuality and he is accepting to have Seungho by his side. Just thinking about In Hun causes pain to BNK here, while he was in ecstasy in the chapter 20. He even wrinkled the painting of the ceremony with In Hun which shows the huge pain in his heart. For him, paintings are treasures. This gesture reveals some changes in BNK. The painter is well aware that the teacher has abandoned him as the former doesn’t want to assume any responsibility. Therefore, his disrespect for the picture is a sign of disrespect for the teacher. Although he has internalized In Hun’s words and views, he is so affected that he no longer admires In Hun like before. In the chapter 42, he no longer calls Jung In Hun "learned sir" but "my teacher" which illustrates that BNK no longer views IH as a noble ("sir") but as a simple teacher. He only sees Jung In Hun in his actual position and not as his social status. We all know that despite being a noble, JIH is not rich and influential. He belongs to the lower nobility. IH is no longer put on a pedestal. But BNK has still some respect for IH as he calls him "my teacher". So there is still a string between the teacher and the painter but it is about to disappear.

There is another common denominator in both scenes: the tears. While BNK cries out joy and happiness in the chapter 20, here his tears are linked pain and sorrow. Furthermore Seungho put the painter on his lap while kissing him and even embraced him. And this shows that Seungho is longing for warmth, love and tenderness. But despite this night, Seungho is well aware that BNK is not loving him yet. He has sex with him because BNK has confessed before that he has never hated the things he did with Seungho which represents a huge step for the lord.

However, the huge contrast is that Seungho is unaware of the reason for BNK’s distress and pain in the chapter 42. Hence he made no move on BNK and was even a little rough as he thought that In Hun had asked him to do such a thing. This reasoning illustrates that Seungho has not realized that BNK has already moved away from the teacher. Besides, he never noticed that BNK lied for him twice. Yet after this night, Seungho has finally sensed the change in their relationship and BNK’s relationship with the teacher.

In conclusion, this chamber is full of symbolism. Here, a noble could feel warmth and love for the first time, although it was just an illusion. Yet he became addicted. As for BNK this room represents the place where he decided to confront reality. In this room, the lord joins the painter which seems to indicate the future position in the couple: Seungho is willing to meet the painter.

That's it. Feel free to comment.

In order to understand why I am comparing both main leads, I have to say that this analysis is based on my theory about Yoon’s suffering from the past. See for more explanations with this analysis.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/mangatopic/5596560/

Our protagonist is the eldest son of an influential noble family who was dragged by the topknot by his own father before cutting it off. This must have traumatized our seme, since in the first season he grabbed two nobles, Jihwa and another sex partner, by the topknot and threw them in the courtyard. Because of the father’s gesture, Seungho’s reputation was ruined as he was declared a sodomite in front of the servants. As results, the gossip started. Out of resent and hatred, Seungho decided not only to turn this rumor into a reality but also decided to become the biggest sodomite ever. So living in debauchery in order to hurt his father the most… ensure that the latter wouldn’t be able to make a comeback so soon or to help his younger brother as his own father had betrayed him.

This led to the following situation. This unwilling homosexual had problems with his sexuality hence he needed replenishing medicine and help from the ukes in order to get aroused… until he saw Baek Na-Kyum’s paintings. Notice that in the paintings, we see one lover trying to look to his partner. The gaze is rather vivid compared to the drawing Jihwa had. Furthermore, BNK’s paintings about sodomy ooze warmth and love. They all look so natural, there is no shame or pain connected to sodomy. That’s why I came to realize that what Seungho affects the most is what he sees. This explains why the author drew many pictures of Seungho’s gaze.

Therefore in my opinion, the problem Seungho had was the gaze he received from people. As you know, the eyes are considered as a sort of mirror, people can see themselves in the eyes of the other party. From my point of view, although Seungho doesn’t care about the rumors, he saw himself judged, he saw their repulsion but more importantly he saw himself as disgusting and repulsive. He took their judgement as face value. He believed that their eyes did give a true reflection of himself: repulsive.

You are wondering now why I came to this idea that Seungho couldn’t bear the gaze from others but on the other hand, showed no concern to rumors and gossip. It is because first, the rumor of his homosexuality was created by gossip and he knew that the gossip never reflected the reality. Secondly gossip and rumors are linked to the ear and not to the eyes. There is no reflection at all.

There is a scene which reveals the importance of the eye and gaze in Seungho’s mind. This happens in the pavilion, where he has sex with Jihwa. He came to visit his sex partner, although he already had sex with him the night before. The reason for his visit was the first painting that Baek Na Kyum had created had aroused him immensely.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5833993/
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5833999/
episode 3
Notice that although Seungho is having sex with Jihwa, he doesn’t look at him. His eyes are not directed towards his partner but they are focused on his mind, on the painting he discovered that morning. It was as if he was blind… he only sees the picture of Baek Na Kyum. The reason for this strong reaction is that he observed his own gaze caught by the painter.



The lord’s gaze not only was directed to the painter, but it also showed desire and attraction. There is nothing ugly and disgusting in this gaze. That’s why he is so obsessed with the picture, when he has sex with Jihwa. This scene outlines that Seungho cares a lot about what he sees. He saw in the painting a different reflection of himself. This explains why after this first painting, Seungho is often starring at Baek Na-Kyum while having sex with others. Seungho keeps looking into the painter’s eyes. He is fascinated by the gaze he is receiving from Baek Na Kyum who is unaware that his eyes are betraying him. That’s why there is this quote: “The eyes are the mirror of the soul”.

http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5834031/
here episode 14
In other words, through the first painting, Seungho saw a different reflection of himself and realized his own attraction. This freed him from the disgust he felt for himself. He could finally accept himself and even his “forced homosexuality”. But since he realized that the painter had painted him in such a positive way, he couldn’t help himself looking at the painter. He became interested in him, even attracted to him, since the latter revealed a certain desire.

However, there is one scene where Baek Na-Kyum show a certain repulsion in front of Seungho… it is the moment when Seungho tries to make a move on the painter.
episode 2
Striking is that he is even using his own gaze in order to seduce the painter. But at the same time, he also warns the painter if he disobeys him, he will be punished.
However, since the painter has been brainwashed by Jung In-Hun, the former shows disgust for one minute which upsets the lord. Simultaneously, Baek na Kyum’s reaction is also triggered by the subtle thread. His facial expression shows disgust as fear too.

The other reason why I am outlining the importance of the gaze and eyes is because of Sartres’ philosophy, a French writer and philosopher from the 20th century. In one of his theaterplays called “No exit”, one of the characters there says:

“hell is other people” (“L’enfer, c’est les autres”) by Jean Paul Sartres

Being surrounded by people, you will always be confronted by their eyes and their stare will reflect their own perception of the other. You will see yourself in the other’s eyes and this reflection will let you believe that this is your own reflection and your true personality.
However, eyes never reflect the reality as there is a lot of subjectivity. And our seme Seungho had been definitely living a hell due to the disgusted gaze from others. Notice that Jihwa is portrayed with closed eyes in the painting (see the third picture above), just like the other ukes… this explicates why Seungho could never see his own attraction and even the love Jihwa had for him. Jihwa tried to hide his own feelings, scared that he would frighten Seungho. Nevertheless what Seungho needed was to see himself as someone lovable, as someone attractive but Jihwa never let him see this.

Finally, the significance of the gaze is also pointed out with another scene and element: the mirror. After the rape, Baek Na Kyum tried to run away but he was stopped by his mentor, Jung In Hun, who forced him to go back to the mansion. After his return, Seungho dragged the painter to his chamber where they spent the whole day and night together. Here, Seungho even puts the painter in front of a mirror because he wants him to see his own reflection: he is affected by Seungho. He wants to acknowledge his own desire and his suppressed sexuality.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5834014/

episode 32
The painting and the gaze of Baek Na Kyum liberated the lord from his own trauma and suffering but at the same time, it inflicted a new pain: the painter was never looking at him, as his heart and mind were occupied by the hypocrite Jung In Hun which leads me to the second part: a portrait of Baek Na Kuym. With the mirror, Seungho was confronting the painter with his own reflection, simultaneously the lord wanted him to see that Seungho was his partner and not the “learned sir”. It also showed his desire for the painter.

Now that we have portrayed our seme, it is time to pay attention to our painter Baek Na-Kyum. The arc of the first season represents the loss of innocence of our uke.

Striking is that the latter’s life represents the opposite of Seungho. While the latter belongs to the influential nobility, Baek Na Kyum is an abandoned infant who was raised by the head gisaeng. His unknown origins and the fact that he was raised in a brothel reveal his low social status. But their social status is not actually the biggest contrast. Now, you are wondering what this means. Let us not forget that people kept wondering why NK painted sodomy so early and they all thought that he had seen this in the gisaeng house. However, I believe that in reality BNK chose sodomy because he recognized his own sexuality very early. He felt that he was attracted to men and thought that there was nothing disgusting at all.


Notice that the young man is painting outside and anyone can see his drawing. This underlines his lack of shame. For him, homosexuality was natural. And this picture shows his innocence as well. Although he was raised in a brothel, he remains pure. This shows that he initially accepted his own sexuality but he knew that he couldn’t live with his homosexuality so openly, because as an adult, he realized the complication. Hence he published his books under a pseudonym. Nevertheless, he connected homosexuality to love but not sex, although he had been raised in a place where there is only sex and not love. Baek Na Kyum wanted to be able to read and write on his own. He values education a lot which is also palpable in the poem from Jung In Hun he kept. At some point he met the teacher Jung In Hun who became a surrogate father to him. He literally worshiped the poor lord and always thought that the teacher was intelligent because of Jung In Hun’s tendency to paint himself as superior. Notwithstanding the teacher Jung In Hun must have discovered his books. From that moment, the teacher tried to oppress Baek Na-Kyum’s homosexuality. He started brainwashing him saying that this was something disgusting and repulsive. The gaze from In Hun must have played a huge part in it, especially because he was attracted to the teacher due to his education and good manners. The repulsive gaze from In Hun and his harsh words had a huge impact on the painter. Let us not forget that Baek Na Kyum called Seungho a person consumed by lust (episode 4) and later we hear the same expression in the mouth of the double-faced Jung In Hun. The teacher forced him to stop painting. He could no longer paint sodomy as he had been manipulated to believe that homosexuality is vulgar and bizarre. It is an abnormality where he could no longer link homosexuality with warmth and loving stare.

As you can see, the painter’s homosexuality was oppressed, while Seungho was forced to homosexuality. However, the gaze Seungho gave to BNK had the same effect. In this gaze, he could feel the admiration from the lord
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5291837/

episode 1: Seungho reveals his admiration for the painter
Seungho is actually smiling and starring warmly at BNk, until the painter denies that he is the author of the painting. However, the first painting BNK drew in the lord’s house reflects the attraction and the lust from Seungho (see the third picture above). There is no negative judgement coming from the lord… and as much as BNK’s gaze through the painting liberated Seungho from his own hell, Seungho’s gaze had the same effect on BNK, his true sexuality was coming on the surface. This is illustrated, when Baek Na Kyum paints the first picture for Seungho. While he is painting with the brush, he reminisces the sex scene and keeps thinking about the gaze Seungho gave him.
http://www.mangago.zone/home/photo/5834006/

episode 2: this gaze reveals attraction, desire and lust.
The gaze triggered the sleeping sexuality in Baek Na-Kyum. That’s why BNK had a wet dream with Seungho in the episode 6. The explanation is quite simple. The more he saw Seungho in his sexual activities, the more Seungho kept looking at the painter, the more Baek Na Kyum was affected. He could no longer oppress his sexual desires. We shouldn’t forget that although he thinks, he is in love with Jung In Hun, he dreamed about having sex with the lord and not the teacher. He has the impression that Seungho is touching him… BNK tried the whole time to fight against his own desire because he had been brainwashed by In Hun. As conclusion, the gaze played a huge part for the two main characters. It liberated them, the painter’s sexuality came alive, whereas Seungho freed himself from the judging gazes.

And now, at the end of the chapter 40, In Hun reveals his true thoughts about the painter. He is just a prostitute. Yet there is a huge difference between Seungho and the painter. While Seungho has never cared for gossip and rumor hence he felt no embarrassment, BNK has always paid attention to people’s opinion and judgement. As you can observe, Baek Na Kyum is sensitive to the ear. Striking is that we often witness the noble whispering to the painter’s ear, like in the following drawing. Or at the tailor shop… Baek Na Kyum seems to pay more attention to the ear than to the eye. That’s the reason why he is sensitive to gossip, unlike the lord. So not only he is affected by the gaze from others (see the shop owner’s gaze) but also he is definitely affected about what he hears. He believes that rumors are reflecting reality that’s why in the beginning, BNK remembered the rumors circulating about Seungho. Our uke is not so mentally strong like our seme and in my opinion, Seungho needs to realize this. He needs to understand that Na-Kyum is different from him in that matter. He has been brainwashed by the teacher, the fatherly figure. But just like Yoon Seungho, he makes the same experience: he is betrayed and abandoned by his “father”. They share a similar experience, yet Baek Na Kyum’s betrayal is new compared to the one Seungho lived. Notwithstanding, I believe that this could bring them closer.

Moreover, there is another reason why Yoon Seungho’s heart was moved and touched by Baek Na-Kyum: his tears. In the first episode, he cries after the lord tried to make him feel guilty about the death of the servant. In this scene, the noble even lowers himself to the painter and wipes away the tears. He is surprised by his emotional reaction. And the tears play a huge part why the noble will become more and more emotional. As conclusion, the eyes and tears are the most important elements which change both personalities.

From my point of view, Seungho needs to remind Na-Kyum that he is definitely a talented painter… he needs to say what he mentioned in the beginning:

“These are the talented hands”.

BNK needs to hear something positive about himself. Moreover, Seungho needs to change BNK’s reputation. The latter is always described as low-born but what Jihwa and the others forget is that BNK is a talented painter in the first place.
BNK has to find his true identity, his true self… If he is not called a low-born, then people call him with different names:
– “my boy” like in the picture from the episode 1 (see above)

– a “servant” which BNK denies
– a “ill-bred cur” or
– Even Seungho described him as “In Hun’s bride”, when he was upset
– “a prostitute”
As you can see, people forget that he is a painter… all of them (except Seungho) look down on him. Just like a teenager who detached himself from his father, Baek Na Kyum needs to find his true self, his true identity so that he is no longer defined by his status.

When we look how the relationship between Seungho and Baek Na Kyum evolved, we can clearly see that the lord had awaken his oppressed sexuality. He approached little by little the painter, however he never thought that Baek Na KYum was so innocent, since he had been raised in a gisaeng house and painted such erotic paintings. He never thought that this boy was so pure and innocent, although the sudden love confession reflected his innocence. As much as the first experience was not so painful, the discovery that he had mistaken Seungho for his teacher pained him a lot. Because of this, he was later raped and even forced to do a blow job. Baek Na KYum had such a bad experience with sex that this was a rude awakening. On the one hand, he had been freed from his oppressed homosexuality, on the other hand he discovered the violence of sex as well. He could not see any love and warmth in it, although he had been the one who gave love and warmth during the first night spent with Seungho. While the latter was craving for this again, Baek Na Kyum was somehow disgusted as the lord had taken advantage. Due to the rape, BNK can no longer see love in Seungho’s gesture, even when the one claims that he will take responsibility for this. It will take a long time for the painter to discern the true nature of Yoon’s gestures and words.

That’s why it becomes even more urgent for Seungho to intervene and support BNK as a painter. He has definitely connections to the royal academy. Just changing the clothes is not enough and Seungho will realize that.
In other words, Seungho needs to help BNK in many ways… not just a job as painter but also to give him an education, something BNK has always been longing. Actually, BNK fell in love with In Hun because the latter acted as an educated man on the surface. He saw in him the father he was missing. He had a oedipal relationship with him, until the latter abandoned him as he reminded him where he came from: a giseang house. He had never been his adoptive son… just a low-born, a prostitute. By supporting Baek Na Kyum in his education and career, Seungho can get the love he has been longing for. Baek Na Kyum will realize the love Seungho has for him. I suppose, the attempted murder and Seungho’s protection could be the trigger for the painter to perceive the lord in a different light.

Fell free to comment.