Mocha

This side story pisses me off. Also for someone who's in college, he's still dumb as fuck as to reconnect with someone who strangled him and scared his mother from remarrying ever.

And if he really chooses to be with he'll be with the boss eventually, he's REALLY DUMB AS FUCK to get into that relationship. Why?! I mean, I should've known with how stupid looking he is with his naive sparkly eyes ugh I'm so mad

I understand the gravity of immortality, I've read so much of this theme and I completely understand the fear of living beyond the passage of time.

But I have so so many things I'd love to do. Maybe I'm just so used to my own company and I find that I move on pretty quick with people—I'm grateful for the company they provided but if they have to go, I find myself accepting it so quickly it's weird.

I'd love to go to college over and over again, taking different programs. Mastering every skill in the arts. I want to try different career paths. Study something tediously to discover something new. Try living on different parts of the world. Making it a mission to be in close contact with as many animals, observing them and making art. I can finally binge watch every single mainstream media without feeling like I'm wasting my time because I should've been "productive." I wouldn't feel on edge anymore because I'm not running out of time.

It's like, with endless amounts of hobbies and knowledge, coupled with the advancement of technology, I won't get bored; because I'm relishing not in finite relationships, but in myself and interests, who will live on forever.

I don't know, maybe I still need more time to realize that immortality isn't good, but it's just that my fear of regrets and not doing enough of everything I've wanted outweighs it. I want to be everything, and it's impossible with the human lifespan.

Am I the only one who thinks this way? ;-;