
Im so tired of everything why isn't there anything that could make me feel something, I'm tired of loging in everyday and reading yaoi and it won't make heart flutter, but I can't stop reading yaoi because I'm addicted nothing makes me feel anything anymore

i used to feel like this too. reading yaoi because i have nothing to do and i feel like my hobbies dont make me happy anymore and i just keep reading yaoi or mangas bc its easy but i feel empty.
the solution tho is get out i guess. i was hoping i would die from covid but it didnt happen so i had sex. and then sex.
it worked for me. i can enjoy some stuff again.

omg same here(besides having sex lmao a bitch lonely af) but i'm glad i'm not the only one who's only "hobby" is reading yaoi. but everything is just so empty, and nothing genuinely makes me happy. everything seems painful, empty, and meaningless. i'm thinking of starting to make music bc music is really one of the only things keeping me alive rn. i also wished that
i would die from covid so that my family wouldn't have to mourn bc of my suicide, instead they could blame my death on an illness. i guess we just have to trust in what we can't see rn. life feels like a hassle at this point, and i still can't understand why we have to be alive? wtf is the point of living if we're all going to die. death nor life sounds good to me. i can't help wishing that i never existed, or at least that i could fall asleep forever. then i wouldn't have to deal with death and i could just sleep in peace.

Oh lord same people same....actualy i have games in my phone. many games but yaknow that when its just a tap away but you cant because it feels like someone is holding your hand away and its tiring to fight it. its like that.
how do we fix this? i dont have much hope anymore. its sad that i used to have dreams and enthusiasm but its burned out so much i just hope i wont wake up anymore.
now i realize the look an adult gave me when i was young and declared i want to have a bakery.
its as u guys said. im glad i wasnt alone thinking about wanting to die but unable to kill oneself bc of loved ones.
i opened up to a friend but she isnt exactly mean but having someone say youre just dramatic you dont even cut your wrist or something how can u be suicidal.
lmao this is a mess im just pouring shit bc its been so long i thought im alone
I'm going to fucking cry