JasperQuinnzel's Things

Ever since I can recall I've never been able to forge an emotional connection with people may they be family friends or random people I sleep with its like I've always just went with the flow giving the minimal responses that society expected of me for example my older brother just had a his first child and everyone in my family was overjoyed about it crying congratulating him saying how cute the baby is and I felt nothing at all it was as interesting to me as watching paint dry it just seemed like another random fact of life and I don't feel guilt shame hate love jealously affection anymore its like the moment I turned 14 something in my Nero pathways or brain chemistry went wrong but has given me this hyper focus when preparing at work or collage I'm currently in an undergrad degree and spend all my time working or doing projects I attend social events to reduce the time I'm forced to spent with my current roommate as he has a pathological need for attention but his family is rich so I try to stay on his good side as where I'm located its very much who you know to get a job regardless of skills or qualifications but in my mind I don't see this as taking advantage of him more of a business deal or contract often when I mention that I'm only rooming with him because i know how rich he is he takes it as a joke but reacts by being destructive or really emotional saying I'm a toxic sociopath but always freaks out if I'm more then 3 hours away from him i know people reading this may agree with him but surely i cant be the only human on earth who is like this robot like everyone i know mentions it saying stuff like "Your all wrong inside" one quote which always stuck with me from a ex I'm intrigued to know has anyone ever felt this lack of feeling before ?