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I don't think he is abusive and doesn't love his wife at the first life. You already heard some of the story, he was tricked. Come to a whole new world not because of his own accord. Of course he will look a bit different. Maybe he was very nervous, distant... because all of these people in Korea is not the people in his world. And from when I see it in the first life I think he was just anxious. Maybe his wife is the only person in that whole world who he felt comfortable enough. And he was afraid his wife will leave him alone. He was in despair when his wife died because of him. I don't think it's only because he didn't felt grateful about his wife and only feel regret after she's gone. If he was regretful then he would be feeling it after some time losing his wife not right after she died in front of his wife. I can't really explain it well. And this is my theory, not because I read the spoiler. But you guys know that there are tons of other ML who is much much more abusive than this ML. This ML is only possesive I think. And he has a reason for that. A very good reason. I don't understand why people always felt pity for the FL or MC but can't feel pity for the tragic past of the ML.
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I agree. This is how it should be looked at. It's truly neither the ML or FL fault for how things turned out, it's just their circumstances that made things difficult. You can also neither blame ML for not talking about his situation to FL because he was kind of treated like a lab rat after being forced to stay in Korea because of his power, guide after guide came to him, without his will while he had no say in this. He was tricked by the saintess thinking his action would help his country but he got caged instead. Imagine being thrown in an unfamiliar and new place, was forced to stay there without being able to return back home. One would definitely feels helpless, frustrate, scared and rage.
He most likely couldn't tell FL whatt was happening to him, he didn't know how she would react and maybe he was being put under surveillance too because it did mention that ML was always on guard towards somthing unknown. But he did learn to love the FL, and she became his source of comfort in this new world that he couldn't escape. He might have been extremely anxious when his only source of warmth was not near him.
Sincerely none of the FL or ML should be blamed, it's just their circumstances that got them where they stand, in an awkward position without clear understanding of what happened. Unfortunately readers don't often think anymore when they read. People don't even read through things anymore.
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As someone who is on the side of "not liking him" I more so don't like him as the male lead then as a person. While you bring up the point of him not being abusive as a point, I will respectfully say I disagree with that statement. Did he hit her? No, of course not but there are other forms of abuse. He was very negligent in their relationship, and while that doesn't always equate to abuse, judging by the emotional scars it left on the MC and how it still affects her, in this case in particular I would classify it as so. And I do understand it was not intentional, that was not his overall goal, but accidental negligence is still negligence. Just because it was not on purpose does not mean we shouldn't hold him accountable for those actions.
Don't get me wrong I understand the trauma and turmoil he was going through, especially knowing the fact he was in an unfamiliar world where he was unsure who to trust, while it explains why he was the way he was during their relationship it certainly does not excuse it. They were married for years(? Years? Maybe, I honestly forgot for how long) at some point during that I feel like he should've opened up a bit towards the MC, but he didn't because I saw the relationship that they were currently experiencing was adequate enough and he didn't realise how much he cared for her until she died.
I just want to clarify that I am in no way trying to change your mind about how you feel about the male lead, that is your opinion and you're very much to your right to it. I just wanted to explain my own thoughts for why I do not like him for the mc personally.
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even if it wasn't entirely* his fault, he isn't blameless since he did* make his wife feel unloved, neglected, isolated her from others, and overall miserable in their relationship. her perspective makes it seem like the only reason she stayed with him despite all that was because she didn't have any self-love/self-worth. she talks a lot about how she has a loving family now* but it doesn't talk about her past family's relationship with her other than how she--again--felt unloved in whatever their situation was.
even presuming he had circumstances that made it impossible to explain his feelings or his actual* situation with being stuck in a literal foreign world after being tricked it just doesn't make it permissible that she had to feel miserable [explicitly] from how he treated her.
=she shouldn't have had to put up with that shit & if she had the confidence of knowing that *she is worthy of being loved* then she probably wouldn't have tolerated his half-assed possessive treatment. it took ACTUAL DYING for him to let on that he did* care for her (even if it's not clear if it's love or just an excessive need for possessing her).
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i was onboard with ya until you compared it to "he's not as bad as *name-a-jerk* so he's really not that bad" kind of thinking. yeah, there are worse ML's but that doesn't mean that he's any less than who he is / what he's done. he's not the only victim and he's not the only villain. he's kind of a gray morality so far [c16]. aside from the fact he still seems like a dick to his younger brother.
i kind of wish the younger brother was the secret *new* ML just because he and the ML deserve to be treated better than he* treats either of them. plus he's a cutie. (● ̄(エ) ̄●)
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He is not abusive, but he was a red flag, in my opinion. If your partner controls your life, locks you in their house, doesn't let you meet your friends, doesn't communicate with you and ignore you and shows no love, that will make him a red flag. How do you expect her to understand it? Why people shouldn't pity her in this case? I understand his situation but it doesn't mean that you should make your partner's life miserable. I hope you guys don't side with him because he is some kind of handsome MF.
Honestly, I began hating him more when he entered room of Irene at night? He's just a psycho. If your wife doesn't seek you out in this life, surely she doesn't want to be associated with you anymore. And yet here goes his obsession, and he has audacity to think that his wife would never ignore him and happily comply with his wishes in previous life and would do the same in this life, too.
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Yeaa... I understood Ciel... So im not against him being ML..I mean really like him too.. Like i understand how he can't trust anyone in the modern universe due to
1. Being scam by fake saintesss
2.the only one who went to the modern universe like not one single familiar companion
3.trapped
4.wanted to trust FL but what makes him so sure that FL not in on it with the fake Saintess and the organization that scammed him
But now that he is back.. He should've like have room to reflect and gain back common sense to realize that he had never shared any of his scammed experience with the fake Saintess and the organization. I mean like.. Yea.. In their last moment, FL was like still love u n sacrifice herself for u, but like still dude.. When she died, don't u feel regret at all for the wasted moment u never truly open bout ur feeling to FL albeit u kinda died soon after.. But u got time to think of that when u went back to the past, right? Cz he went back pretty far back before the Saintess banquet or something right.. He is a respectable duke.. I would expect someone of that position to have good thinking skill
As for FL, she didn't know about what condition the ML was in when he was brought to EARTH..
1.she didn't know that he was forced to stay
2.threatened and used by the organisation (she thought he was like one of the higher up cz he is an elite/s class esper)
3.she didn't know ML dilemma of scared being threatened with FL safety if they knew he love her, or FL might be in cahoots with the organisation and would manipulate him if she knew he love him..
So that's why she tries to stay away from him
So imo, maybe.. If FL give ML chance to explained himself, and ML realize that his previous behaviour would cause FL to think that he doesn't love her, so he should suggest to explain himself or at least confess ur feelings so FL would retort that what he did was not love then he could explained why he was like that?
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For me.. A person is not redeemable is when they don't regret, don't think what they did was wrong at all, no effort to try to see from victim /other pov, don't want to try to meet half way, do not reflect on self and improve self for the better.
They don't need to be perfect at it. But if they actually do them, regrets, reflects etc.. Then I think they are redeemable.. Maybe not at once.. But step by step would be good.. Tho they are characters.. Having characters that can grow and be better and reflect on themself is good.. It promotes motivation for positive self improvement.. Self reflect.. And not hate themself or existence but their behaviour.. And understand that behaviour can change and improve..
One example of unredeemable character imo would be Diana from For My Abandoned Love.. Cz she sure does not reflect herself.. And hating people simply because they don't nod to her will..
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Forgot to add,.. I LOVE ML.. idk how his character will progress.. But i hope he is one of the redeemable type of character.. Because I like him.. And want him to be with FL.. and his lil bro be like cute brother in law and FL also pamper him.. Poor brother in law.. He is just a kid and the adults made him became so self hate like that .. I also hope ML would opened up to lil bro.. Here's hoping FL influence would rub on ML to be kinder to good people in his life albeit not all.. At least to those close to him..
I just wish after the whole flashback ends. Someone could just give me summary out of it so I could just move on to Ian again without having to read this whole flashback. I haven't read this anymore...
i’ve been over it for so long i just want ian back