THEOLIVEOIL's Things

okay *takes a deep breath* this past few years I was so immersed in yaoi that it started to turn me on:"), you know... I was worried like what if I get a partner in the future and as a hetero girl the straight makeout, or sex whatever won't turn me on? and make me rigid? bcz I tried some straight smut and yall I couldn't finish it I WAS LITERALLY BORED...#－.－)

so what I was trying to say I'm 19 and I experienced masturbation for the first time months ago, still a virgin ( huhu what a surprise right !) bcz i was raised in a kind of religious and strict environment I feel ashamed about touching myself so tell me is it normal to feel horny and excited like every night or I'm just a piece of pervert trash and I should seek help srsly? and how to manage to not touch myself though...