[Apologies for the long post. Please ignore it. This is just me keeping record of what I read & felt]
I have lost count of exactly how many times my heart DIED while reading this creation of Kyuugou. It was excruciatingly intense & rich with dark, distorted emotions. The whole ambiance of this manga - every panel, every strand of hair, each glance, even simply the wind blowing was enough to make me shiver with fear & anticipation. I kept staring at some pages for more than a minute. I thought, if I don't watch them closely & carefully I'll miss something really important. Everything....and I mean E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G in this story from the start to the last line of last chapter gripped & gnawed at my heart.
I have been wracking my brains after finishing it, exactly which brother was more pitiful and here I am sitting in front of my laptop....staring at the wall, for god knows how long. It felt like they were twin brothers cursed by the destiny itself and Kei's words kept ringing in my ears, "why do you think we came into this world separately?" No matter how much I think about, I can't find/imagine a way for Kei's salvation from his path of self-destruction neither could I bring myself to blame Roku for anything.
Among all the incest mangas & other thought provoking, emotionally disturbing psychological mangas I have read so far, Kyuugou crushed it. It's not like she used some complicated difficult words or dramatic scenes. With simple words, simple lines, simple scenes.....she pulled me into her world! As if everything was happening in front of my very eyes in slow motion holographic images & I can do nothing about it but to see them getting shattered & destroyed by their uncontrollable overwhelming emotions. The eeriness of every scene got under my skin & made me recoil with horror & suspense. Still, I couldn't stop myself from getting swept away with each chapter. It's no wonder she dropped it. I mean, I feel like this just after reading it, so I could not possibly imagine what she must have felt while writing those 9 chapters thick with mind-crippling emotions.
Despite feeling compassionate for her I would still pray & hope that Kyuugou sensei would pick it up again one day & write it till the end. Not just because it's a Masterpiece but because I have come to deeply love & care for those miserable characters. And I don't want them to be stuck in a time hole for eternity without a definite closure.
I have lost count of exactly how many times my heart DIED while reading this creation of Kyuugou. It was excruciatingly intense & rich with dark, distorted emotions. The whole ambiance of this manga - every panel, every strand of hair, each glance, even simply the wind blowing was enough to make me shiver with fear & anticipation. I kept staring at some pages for more than a minute. I thought, if I don't watch them closely & carefully I'll miss something really important. Everything....and I mean E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G in this story from the start to the last line of last chapter gripped & gnawed at my heart.
I have been wracking my brains after finishing it, exactly which brother was more pitiful and here I am sitting in front of my laptop....staring at the wall, for god knows how long. It felt like they were twin brothers cursed by the destiny itself and Kei's words kept ringing in my ears, "why do you think we came into this world separately?" No matter how much I think about, I can't find/imagine a way for Kei's salvation from his path of self-destruction neither could I bring myself to blame Roku for anything.
Among all the incest mangas & other thought provoking, emotionally disturbing psychological mangas I have read so far, Kyuugou crushed it. It's not like she used some complicated difficult words or dramatic scenes. With simple words, simple lines, simple scenes.....she pulled me into her world! As if everything was happening in front of my very eyes in slow motion holographic images & I can do nothing about it but to see them getting shattered & destroyed by their uncontrollable overwhelming emotions. The eeriness of every scene got under my skin & made me recoil with horror & suspense. Still, I couldn't stop myself from getting swept away with each chapter. It's no wonder she dropped it. I mean, I feel like this just after reading it, so I could not possibly imagine what she must have felt while writing those 9 chapters thick with mind-crippling emotions.
Despite feeling compassionate for her I would still pray & hope that Kyuugou sensei would pick it up again one day & write it till the end. Not just because it's a Masterpiece but because I have come to deeply love & care for those miserable characters. And I don't want them to be stuck in a time hole for eternity without a definite closure.
2022-04-16 17:27 marked
Soooo..
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I took a peek at the raws and because I taught myself how to read Hangul (even though I don't really understand it that well yet), I discovered that Edd freakin' told McQueen that he loves him in chapter 31 (I'm sure of this, because who the hell doesn't know what 'Saranghaeyo' is? XD). Anyway, back to the raws... so, (in chapter 32) after confessing, Edd started to walk away, but McQueen who was shocked at first, grabbed him by the arm and FREAKING KISSED HIM Y'ALL, I'M CRYING! And then after like idk flashbacks(?) from their time together or McQueen explaining sth to Edd, McQueen tells Edd that he likes him back and they'll kiss again and then they're gonna head home and make love. Kyaaa!
Okay, that's all I got, people... Sorry, I couldn't go into detail, cause my Korean vocabulary is very VERY small, so I am not able to spoil anymore than that... Believe me, there are more interesting things going to happen from what I've seen from the raws, but I am just unable to understand..
P.S: English isn't my first language either so I hope this is at least decently written and understandable for you guys and also I am very sorry in advance if I misinterpreted anything.
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I took a peek at the raws and because I taught myself how to read Hangul (even though I don't really understand it that well yet), I discovered that Edd freakin' told McQueen that he loves him in chapter 31 (I'm sure of this, because who the hell doesn't know what 'Saranghaeyo' is? XD). Anyway, back to the raws... so, (in chapter 32) after confessing, Edd started to walk away, but McQueen who was shocked at first, grabbed him by the arm and FREAKING KISSED HIM Y'ALL, I'M CRYING! And then after like idk flashbacks(?) from their time together or McQueen explaining sth to Edd, McQueen tells Edd that he likes him back and they'll kiss again and then they're gonna head home and make love. Kyaaa!
Okay, that's all I got, people... Sorry, I couldn't go into detail, cause my Korean vocabulary is very VERY small, so I am not able to spoil anymore than that... Believe me, there are more interesting things going to happen from what I've seen from the raws, but I am just unable to understand..
P.S: English isn't my first language either so I hope this is at least decently written and understandable for you guys and also I am very sorry in advance if I misinterpreted anything.
2019-04-27 15:21 marked
To people who think "you shouldn't complain about the grammar because you're reading it for free": why not? Nobody is insulting the translator, merely stating that the quality of the translation is not up to par compared to the work of other groups. And I, for one, agree. At times I found the dialogue to be difficult to follow, which detracted from my understanding and enjoyment of the story. If you're someone for whom this does not apply, great! But I don't think that is a valid reason to dismiss the feedback of other people who feel differently. And regarding the "if you think you can do better, blah blah" rebuttal, I am speaking as someone who has experience in all areas of scanlating (translating/typesetting/cleaning) so I know how much work it can be... but that's not exactly an excuse for skimping on effort. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.
2018-03-26 06:00 marked
2018-02-15 19:43 marked
Since mgg isn't hosting chapters on their site for the time being I decided to post dropbox links on this topic so everyone who isn't able to pay for the official Lezhin chapters will still be able to read them! (๑•ㅂ•)و✧ I'll update the chapter links every Wednesday (in the USA for those of you a day ahead) which is the same day they update on the official site - so please check back on this topic for the updates! ^^
Links:
Chapters 1-10: http://www.mangago.zone/read-manga/sign_language/uu/sign_language-chapter-1
Chapters 11-13: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/18KkLPlozsNe2cnXEJQP3A23zDmK9V6OP?usp=sharing
And lastly if you have the ability to, please support the creator of Sign Language by buying the official chapters!! (▰˘◡˘▰)
Korean: https://www.lezhin.com/ko/comic/sign_language
English: https://www.lezhin.com/en/comic/sign_en
Links:
Chapters 1-10: http://www.mangago.zone/read-manga/sign_language/uu/sign_language-chapter-1
Chapters 11-13: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/18KkLPlozsNe2cnXEJQP3A23zDmK9V6OP?usp=sharing
And lastly if you have the ability to, please support the creator of Sign Language by buying the official chapters!! (▰˘◡˘▰)
Korean: https://www.lezhin.com/ko/comic/sign_language
English: https://www.lezhin.com/en/comic/sign_en
2017-12-12 05:52 marked
2017-01-08 13:59 marked
The beginning of chapter 5 is a flashback where they were in elementary school, there was a school trip that day. The childrens talked about not being near Kei because him being an omega would lure people and it's troublesome, the only one who protected for Kei is Tsugitsugu said playing with an omega is not dangerous, Kei was really moved by hearing that and said Tsugitsugu that Kei would find a alpha soon, and he'd never bring Tsugitsugu any trouble so please be friend with him.
Coming back to the present, Kei was together with the Alpha, the Alpha complain that, despite him wanting a child with his 13th lover ( Kei is 13th lover ) Kei went as far as taking emergency contraceptive pill. The alpha wanted to give Kei a new high class apartment as well as living expense. Then he laughed and said he wanted to have sex but since Kei didn't want that, he stopped by saying he would not do it by force either.
When Kei was alone, he felt relieved that he didn't get pregnant with that alpha, he had money and other luxuries but why he felt so empty and lonely inside.
Next scene was about Tsugitsugu, during work he remember that day was the day Kei was in heat, and felt worried but tried to not think about that. However, after seeing the alpha was flirting with another omega in front of his eyes, he got angry and yelled at the alpha that he had to be by Kei's side now since he may be in heat now, the alpha laughed and told him that he had many lovers so he couldn't care for any particular person, then he said if Tsugitsugu was that worried for the Omega, how's about getting down on his knee in front of the Alpha, he would tell him Kei's new address.
Coming back to Kei, he's in heat and had to took the medicine 3 days in a rows, suffering the negative effect. He was sad seeing Tsugistugu and asked him to leave, but Tsugistugu told him that " I didn't give up on you for this. Since now on, I act on my will " . Hearing that Kei cried and said " you already did what you want and left alone this useless omega ", Kei wanted Tsugitsugu to fuck him so hard that he could bear Tsugitsugu's baby, Tsugisugu was stunned hearing that cuz after being biten by a alpha, Omega would not be able to accept anyone else ( their bodies achy, vomit, headache and so on ). However, Kei reassured that if that's with Tsugistugu then he can make it slowly.
Kei told Tsugitsugu to tied him up and make love with him, so his body could not hurt Tsugitsugu. Tsugitsugu was upset seeing how Kei was suffering while having sex with him, then Kei asked him to stroke his face and saying " I love the most whenever you're doing this for me. " then Kei wanted Tsugistugu to come deeper in him, so he could get pregnant his child, he'd be content just with that and would take care of the child own his own. Tsugitsugu was angry hearing that, he were not that irresponsible and asked Kei for marriage.
Later, Kei refused the Alpha saying he's getting married, the Alpha was really suprised telling Kei that was the first time his omega was stolen by a Beta.
In the last part of this chapter, when Kei was doing house work, Tsugistugu told him that he shouldn't do everything, he would share the housework with him. Then Kei smiled and told him that he didn't have to mind that, as a husband he just needed to care for his work at the company, and his most happiness is to be Tsugistugu's wife, even though he often worried that he didn't deserve to be his wife, but from then on, he would stop thinking about that and just try his best to make Tsugistugu happy.
Coming back to the present, Kei was together with the Alpha, the Alpha complain that, despite him wanting a child with his 13th lover ( Kei is 13th lover ) Kei went as far as taking emergency contraceptive pill. The alpha wanted to give Kei a new high class apartment as well as living expense. Then he laughed and said he wanted to have sex but since Kei didn't want that, he stopped by saying he would not do it by force either.
When Kei was alone, he felt relieved that he didn't get pregnant with that alpha, he had money and other luxuries but why he felt so empty and lonely inside.
Next scene was about Tsugitsugu, during work he remember that day was the day Kei was in heat, and felt worried but tried to not think about that. However, after seeing the alpha was flirting with another omega in front of his eyes, he got angry and yelled at the alpha that he had to be by Kei's side now since he may be in heat now, the alpha laughed and told him that he had many lovers so he couldn't care for any particular person, then he said if Tsugitsugu was that worried for the Omega, how's about getting down on his knee in front of the Alpha, he would tell him Kei's new address.
Coming back to Kei, he's in heat and had to took the medicine 3 days in a rows, suffering the negative effect. He was sad seeing Tsugistugu and asked him to leave, but Tsugistugu told him that " I didn't give up on you for this. Since now on, I act on my will " . Hearing that Kei cried and said " you already did what you want and left alone this useless omega ", Kei wanted Tsugitsugu to fuck him so hard that he could bear Tsugitsugu's baby, Tsugisugu was stunned hearing that cuz after being biten by a alpha, Omega would not be able to accept anyone else ( their bodies achy, vomit, headache and so on ). However, Kei reassured that if that's with Tsugistugu then he can make it slowly.
Kei told Tsugitsugu to tied him up and make love with him, so his body could not hurt Tsugitsugu. Tsugitsugu was upset seeing how Kei was suffering while having sex with him, then Kei asked him to stroke his face and saying " I love the most whenever you're doing this for me. " then Kei wanted Tsugistugu to come deeper in him, so he could get pregnant his child, he'd be content just with that and would take care of the child own his own. Tsugitsugu was angry hearing that, he were not that irresponsible and asked Kei for marriage.
Later, Kei refused the Alpha saying he's getting married, the Alpha was really suprised telling Kei that was the first time his omega was stolen by a Beta.
In the last part of this chapter, when Kei was doing house work, Tsugistugu told him that he shouldn't do everything, he would share the housework with him. Then Kei smiled and told him that he didn't have to mind that, as a husband he just needed to care for his work at the company, and his most happiness is to be Tsugistugu's wife, even though he often worried that he didn't deserve to be his wife, but from then on, he would stop thinking about that and just try his best to make Tsugistugu happy.
2016-10-01 06:21 marked
Please be aware that this is the doujin for Kuroke no Basuke, Ogeretsu Tanaka sensei shared this on her blog when she wasn't employed yet. But soon after, she was employed as the official artist in one the company in Japan and thus she need to stop distributing any of her doujins. I think this is her last work before she was employed. All of her doujins in her blog were deleted and published in two books, so i guess there wont be any more updates because she starts to focus on her main work.
BUT I LOVE THIS MANGA. I also wished for a sequel, but i have searched everywhere, even the raws. There were none. :( Truthfully, all of Ogeretsu sensei's doujin of Aomine x Kise are the best. Her other official works were so-so compared to all of her doujins.
BUT I LOVE THIS MANGA. I also wished for a sequel, but i have searched everywhere, even the raws. There were none. :( Truthfully, all of Ogeretsu sensei's doujin of Aomine x Kise are the best. Her other official works were so-so compared to all of her doujins.
2016-04-24 03:13 marked
2016-02-02 00:42 marked
CHAPTER 5 TRANSLATION / SPOILERS.
Based on Chinese manga raws. Please don't read if you don't want to be spoiled!!
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We start out with Ogata looking at Saya in bed. He says, “Saya… Are you asleep yet?” Saya makes cute drowsy noises. Ogata asks, “…sleepy?” Saya says, “…No I’m not... Yusuke’s expression is very strange. What are you thinking? I don’t understand.” Ogata touches Saya’s cheek and says, “[Even] if you can’t read me, it’s fine. As long as Saya is here with me, that kind of thing isn’t important at all.” Ogata wakes up from his dream, says, “As long as you are………..” then thinks, “It was a dream. Ah, I don’t want to open my eyes. Since behind my closed eyes, I saw within the dream Saya smiling towards me.”
Now at the club, Saya waves awkwardly at Ogata while with another girl. Ogata thinks, “It’s fine like this. Saya is being too gentle given that I did all that to him. He also treats me the same as usual, keeping the relationship to club guest and staff. Definitely won’t meet to talk about that hurtful thing. If it’s always going to be like this… “ Someone announces, “Yo, yo, everyone waiting, next is tequila!!! Guys who want to get started~ Girls quickly come to the front~ Let’s get started!” Saya’s like “Uwaa~ I don’t want tequila!!” and then falls into Ogata’s arms.
Saya: “…Sorry.”
Ogata: “It’s fine.... You all right?”
Saya: “En... Bye.”
Ogata, grabbing Saya: “Ah, wait, wait.”
Saya: “Eh?”
Ogata: “…Uh. It’s nothing. Sorry I frightened you.”
Saya: “…………”
They turn away from each other. Ogata: “It was really nothing!”
Saya: “I don’t mind. No problem!” Cue longing looks. :(
Scene changes. Ogata gets a call from “Otani Senpai” and the dude’s like “Hey it’s been a while, what do you do for work again?”
Ogata: “A senpai introduced me to a job as staff in the VIP section of a club.”
Senpai: “Ha?! But then you’re not actually working as a bartender or waiter?!”
Ogata: There are many reasons! Speaking of that senpai, what’s going on with the new bar?”
Senpai: “Ah! That’s what I wanted to say, I opened the new store, so Ogata, quit your work now! Come back to this side’s bar!”
Ogata: “Really? It’s really finally ready!”
Senpai: “Yes! Ah, sorry! I don’t have a lot of time--”
Ogata suddenly thinks: “—Saya. If I resign now, I won’t be able to work near Saya’s side anymore.”
Senpai: “Ogata—? I hope you will be able to come next month.”
Ogata: “Next month?! Really….”
Senpai: “I’m really sorry, ah… well, while you’re over there, you can let them know from me.” [Uhh not sure about this but I’m guessing it’s something like letting his workplace know he’d be resigning…?]
Ogata: “Ah… it doesn’t matter.”
Senpai: “Is that so? Although you’re not good at talking, your capability is very great, and your face is too!”
Ogata: “You speak too highly of me… Okay, I’ve decided. Next month I’ll head over there.”
Ogata goes home and tells his sister, “Ah, I’m going away again next month.” She’s like whaaat next month?? And Ogata says “I want to change workplaces—it’s far from home.” Sis asks if mom knows and he says he still doesn’t know how he’s going to tell her. Face-planting at his desk, he thinks, “I still have to apologize to him for my behavior… One last time, I want to eat Saya’s breakfast.”
Back at the club, Ogata calls out to Saya and asks him if he’s going to leave in the morning. Saya says, “Probably. What happened?” Ogata says, “…….I…….. am resigning at the end of this month. I have something I want to give you…..also. One last time, I want to eat the breakfast Saya makes. ……That won’t do?” Saya says, “….I’ll wait for you in the old place.” Ogata looking shocked, goes “Eh?” Saya walking away, says, “Ah, but there’s no avocado.” Ogata: “…..Ok.”
Now they’re walking together down the street. Saya asks, “You say you want to resign from this side of the club, is it because you want to go back to working the bar?” Ogata says yes. Saya says, “Then isn’t it great, to do what you’re best at? And I also have something I want to say to Yusuke. You haven’t told anyone else that I like men. Thank you…” Ogata goes, “…..? ..Of course I wouldn’t do that.” Saya, looking shocked and happy [my poor child…] says, “……Thank you…”
Cut to Ogata’s super satisfied face while eating. He’s thinking omg this is too good, and Saya asks, “Tasty--?” Ogata says, “Super delicious.” He thinks sadly to himself, “But… this is the last time.” There’s a banging sound. Ogata asks, “What happened?” Saya says, “Probably drunk people? These days there’s a lot of people like this. From early in the morning there are drunken uncles...” Dude walking in says, “Sure enough, you see this door is open~~~! Didn’t I say? My home is here~ on the side of the shop, ah, but this is very familiar.” The girl, giggling, says, “But that doesn’t mean anything if we’re not allowed in here~! It’s really fine?” Saya goes to say that it’s not business hours yet, but the guy cuts him off with “What? If it isn’t Saya.”
Saya, speechless, says, “….What…..” The dude’s girl asks, “What? Is this a friend of yours?” The guy says, “Ha~? Not at all. This guy is the gay guy who confessed to me back in junior high.” Girl goes, “Eh?! Is that the guy you mentioned when we were drinking?” He replies, “Yeah, that guy over there makes me feel sick/nauseated [also so to say, he’s “disgusting”]. I spread this around and after that he was bullied. After a while he stopped coming to school, isn’t that hilarious?”
Ogata, rightly pissed af, yells “HEY! Shut up and come outside with me!” The dude’s like “What? Who are you, a gay friend?” Ogata tells him, “Apologize to Saya.” The dude kicks him and says, “Say what kind of shit?” Saya goes, “Hey, calm down—,” meanwhile Ogata tells the dude, “If you wanna fight, let’s take it outside.” The dude’s like “I’ll beat the shit out of you and stomp on your face.” Saya says, “Yu-yusuke… wait, wait, don’t!!” Annoying girl clutches at Saya, yells, “So scary! What’s going on?!” Saya says, “I don’t know how to explain this quickly… [turning his attention] Yusuke!”
Change scene to OGATA BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF HIM OUTSIDE. The guy’s basically like ‘Okay, okay, I’m sorry… Forgive me…” Ogata says, “You’re wrong to apologize to me, what’s the point of that?” Saya yells, “Yusuke stop!!” Saya’s like “Quickly let go of me…!” to the girl before heading over to the dude and says, “Ambulance… call an ambulance…” The dude says, “No need, no need… I’m sorry. At that time, it was my bad.” I think It’s Saya who says, “It’s fine/that’s enough, quickly go,” and the dude’s like ok.
Saya’s muttering like “….really…. [what were you] doing…. Yusuke too, is also injured… Why did you pick that fight? Obviously, you don’t have to fuss about this. I used to say it was disgusting. And also, I don’t care what other people think about me. If I play with girls to pretend to be normal to a point, then there’s no problem. I’ve gotten used to this since the beginning.” Ogata yells, “How could you possibly get used to that? Even if it was me, clearly how could there be no problem? Even earlier also hurt you within your heart, right? So I just can’t forgive neither he nor myself… What I and that guy said to you is no different, so although for me to say these words is not convincing, still let me.. say them. Saya liking whomever person, is not a disgusting thing. To be honest, I’m envious of Saya liking a man.” [Not sure about that last line… sorry]
Saya says, “You… you’re too concerned about something like that.” Ogata says, “That time, what I did was the worst. Saya, grabbing his face, says “Ah—really…. Then like this we’re even!” Ogata,’s like “Eh? Wha--? Saya…??” Cue painful forehead smashing and pained moaning lol. Ogata’s like, “You don’t also have to hurt, no sense..” Laughing, Saya says, “It’s nothing, now it’s even!” Ogata says, “How should I—what should I do—to get you to love me again?” Saya says, “….Kiss me, right now.” They smooch~ Saya laughs and says, “You smiled.” Ogata says, “Saya… your forehead’s really red.” Saya says, “You too!!”
[I’m only gonna translate plot-relevant stuff now… umm you can supply the sounds and such yourself… LOL] Inside now, Ogata says, “I want to touch you…” and Saya’s all hesitant like, “We can’t! So suddenly… Don’t take it off… Yusuke… Or rather, don’t look….” Ogata drags his hand away and he’s like “Sorry I couldn’t resist…” I can’t tell if Saya’s smacking Yusuke’s hand away or if he’s giving him a high-five LMAO. Anyway, Saya’s like “You’re actually erect??? Amazing…” Ogata says, “That’s why… I want to see all of you.” Saya spreads his legs and Ogata says, “This is bad.. I’m so excited…” Saya says, “Really? That’s great…” (in the small bubble Ogata says, “Too cute…”). So… yeah blowjob time. Saya says, “It’s dirty, don’t..!” Ogata’s like “The sounds you make are so cute.”
Sooo Saya comes on his face and apologizes. Saya says something like his house is no good, so Ogata invites him over to his place instead and holds out his key, saying “I always wanted to return this to you, it’s about time I did… I want to learn more about what Saya has been hiding. Also because I want to change jobs and start a new life. So I would be very happy if you would accept the keys to my home.” Saya yells, “I’ll accept it, I’ll accept, I super super want it!!” Ogata’s like, “Then take it, quickly take it.”
Final scene. Ogata’s working the bar at his new job. Drunk lady at the counter says, “Hey little brother [dunno what that would be in Japanese?], do people often tell you your facial muscles are dead?” Ogata replies, “Every day.” The lady’s like, "Exactly~ I come often but I’ve never seen you have any other expression~!” Ogata politely replies “I’m sorry.” The lady points and she’s like “But! I feel I’m now able to read you a little! You’re particularly anxious today!” Ogata says, “I’ve been exposed, huh.” Lady asks, “Well why? What’s the reason?” Ogata says, “Because today he’s coming to the store, the person I like.” Lady’s like, “Eh--------? What kind of person-----??” Saya walks in and Ogata’s face goes completely sappy. Lady sees that and starts chuckling. Ogata calls out, “Saya!”
The end. :)
Apologies for any mistakes. Happy holidays everyone!
Based on Chinese manga raws. Please don't read if you don't want to be spoiled!!
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We start out with Ogata looking at Saya in bed. He says, “Saya… Are you asleep yet?” Saya makes cute drowsy noises. Ogata asks, “…sleepy?” Saya says, “…No I’m not... Yusuke’s expression is very strange. What are you thinking? I don’t understand.” Ogata touches Saya’s cheek and says, “[Even] if you can’t read me, it’s fine. As long as Saya is here with me, that kind of thing isn’t important at all.” Ogata wakes up from his dream, says, “As long as you are………..” then thinks, “It was a dream. Ah, I don’t want to open my eyes. Since behind my closed eyes, I saw within the dream Saya smiling towards me.”
Now at the club, Saya waves awkwardly at Ogata while with another girl. Ogata thinks, “It’s fine like this. Saya is being too gentle given that I did all that to him. He also treats me the same as usual, keeping the relationship to club guest and staff. Definitely won’t meet to talk about that hurtful thing. If it’s always going to be like this… “ Someone announces, “Yo, yo, everyone waiting, next is tequila!!! Guys who want to get started~ Girls quickly come to the front~ Let’s get started!” Saya’s like “Uwaa~ I don’t want tequila!!” and then falls into Ogata’s arms.
Saya: “…Sorry.”
Ogata: “It’s fine.... You all right?”
Saya: “En... Bye.”
Ogata, grabbing Saya: “Ah, wait, wait.”
Saya: “Eh?”
Ogata: “…Uh. It’s nothing. Sorry I frightened you.”
Saya: “…………”
They turn away from each other. Ogata: “It was really nothing!”
Saya: “I don’t mind. No problem!” Cue longing looks. :(
Scene changes. Ogata gets a call from “Otani Senpai” and the dude’s like “Hey it’s been a while, what do you do for work again?”
Ogata: “A senpai introduced me to a job as staff in the VIP section of a club.”
Senpai: “Ha?! But then you’re not actually working as a bartender or waiter?!”
Ogata: There are many reasons! Speaking of that senpai, what’s going on with the new bar?”
Senpai: “Ah! That’s what I wanted to say, I opened the new store, so Ogata, quit your work now! Come back to this side’s bar!”
Ogata: “Really? It’s really finally ready!”
Senpai: “Yes! Ah, sorry! I don’t have a lot of time--”
Ogata suddenly thinks: “—Saya. If I resign now, I won’t be able to work near Saya’s side anymore.”
Senpai: “Ogata—? I hope you will be able to come next month.”
Ogata: “Next month?! Really….”
Senpai: “I’m really sorry, ah… well, while you’re over there, you can let them know from me.” [Uhh not sure about this but I’m guessing it’s something like letting his workplace know he’d be resigning…?]
Ogata: “Ah… it doesn’t matter.”
Senpai: “Is that so? Although you’re not good at talking, your capability is very great, and your face is too!”
Ogata: “You speak too highly of me… Okay, I’ve decided. Next month I’ll head over there.”
Ogata goes home and tells his sister, “Ah, I’m going away again next month.” She’s like whaaat next month?? And Ogata says “I want to change workplaces—it’s far from home.” Sis asks if mom knows and he says he still doesn’t know how he’s going to tell her. Face-planting at his desk, he thinks, “I still have to apologize to him for my behavior… One last time, I want to eat Saya’s breakfast.”
Back at the club, Ogata calls out to Saya and asks him if he’s going to leave in the morning. Saya says, “Probably. What happened?” Ogata says, “…….I…….. am resigning at the end of this month. I have something I want to give you…..also. One last time, I want to eat the breakfast Saya makes. ……That won’t do?” Saya says, “….I’ll wait for you in the old place.” Ogata looking shocked, goes “Eh?” Saya walking away, says, “Ah, but there’s no avocado.” Ogata: “…..Ok.”
Now they’re walking together down the street. Saya asks, “You say you want to resign from this side of the club, is it because you want to go back to working the bar?” Ogata says yes. Saya says, “Then isn’t it great, to do what you’re best at? And I also have something I want to say to Yusuke. You haven’t told anyone else that I like men. Thank you…” Ogata goes, “…..? ..Of course I wouldn’t do that.” Saya, looking shocked and happy [my poor child…] says, “……Thank you…”
Cut to Ogata’s super satisfied face while eating. He’s thinking omg this is too good, and Saya asks, “Tasty--?” Ogata says, “Super delicious.” He thinks sadly to himself, “But… this is the last time.” There’s a banging sound. Ogata asks, “What happened?” Saya says, “Probably drunk people? These days there’s a lot of people like this. From early in the morning there are drunken uncles...” Dude walking in says, “Sure enough, you see this door is open~~~! Didn’t I say? My home is here~ on the side of the shop, ah, but this is very familiar.” The girl, giggling, says, “But that doesn’t mean anything if we’re not allowed in here~! It’s really fine?” Saya goes to say that it’s not business hours yet, but the guy cuts him off with “What? If it isn’t Saya.”
Saya, speechless, says, “….What…..” The dude’s girl asks, “What? Is this a friend of yours?” The guy says, “Ha~? Not at all. This guy is the gay guy who confessed to me back in junior high.” Girl goes, “Eh?! Is that the guy you mentioned when we were drinking?” He replies, “Yeah, that guy over there makes me feel sick/nauseated [also so to say, he’s “disgusting”]. I spread this around and after that he was bullied. After a while he stopped coming to school, isn’t that hilarious?”
Ogata, rightly pissed af, yells “HEY! Shut up and come outside with me!” The dude’s like “What? Who are you, a gay friend?” Ogata tells him, “Apologize to Saya.” The dude kicks him and says, “Say what kind of shit?” Saya goes, “Hey, calm down—,” meanwhile Ogata tells the dude, “If you wanna fight, let’s take it outside.” The dude’s like “I’ll beat the shit out of you and stomp on your face.” Saya says, “Yu-yusuke… wait, wait, don’t!!” Annoying girl clutches at Saya, yells, “So scary! What’s going on?!” Saya says, “I don’t know how to explain this quickly… [turning his attention] Yusuke!”
Change scene to OGATA BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF HIM OUTSIDE. The guy’s basically like ‘Okay, okay, I’m sorry… Forgive me…” Ogata says, “You’re wrong to apologize to me, what’s the point of that?” Saya yells, “Yusuke stop!!” Saya’s like “Quickly let go of me…!” to the girl before heading over to the dude and says, “Ambulance… call an ambulance…” The dude says, “No need, no need… I’m sorry. At that time, it was my bad.” I think It’s Saya who says, “It’s fine/that’s enough, quickly go,” and the dude’s like ok.
Saya’s muttering like “….really…. [what were you] doing…. Yusuke too, is also injured… Why did you pick that fight? Obviously, you don’t have to fuss about this. I used to say it was disgusting. And also, I don’t care what other people think about me. If I play with girls to pretend to be normal to a point, then there’s no problem. I’ve gotten used to this since the beginning.” Ogata yells, “How could you possibly get used to that? Even if it was me, clearly how could there be no problem? Even earlier also hurt you within your heart, right? So I just can’t forgive neither he nor myself… What I and that guy said to you is no different, so although for me to say these words is not convincing, still let me.. say them. Saya liking whomever person, is not a disgusting thing. To be honest, I’m envious of Saya liking a man.” [Not sure about that last line… sorry]
Saya says, “You… you’re too concerned about something like that.” Ogata says, “That time, what I did was the worst. Saya, grabbing his face, says “Ah—really…. Then like this we’re even!” Ogata,’s like “Eh? Wha--? Saya…??” Cue painful forehead smashing and pained moaning lol. Ogata’s like, “You don’t also have to hurt, no sense..” Laughing, Saya says, “It’s nothing, now it’s even!” Ogata says, “How should I—what should I do—to get you to love me again?” Saya says, “….Kiss me, right now.” They smooch~ Saya laughs and says, “You smiled.” Ogata says, “Saya… your forehead’s really red.” Saya says, “You too!!”
[I’m only gonna translate plot-relevant stuff now… umm you can supply the sounds and such yourself… LOL] Inside now, Ogata says, “I want to touch you…” and Saya’s all hesitant like, “We can’t! So suddenly… Don’t take it off… Yusuke… Or rather, don’t look….” Ogata drags his hand away and he’s like “Sorry I couldn’t resist…” I can’t tell if Saya’s smacking Yusuke’s hand away or if he’s giving him a high-five LMAO. Anyway, Saya’s like “You’re actually erect??? Amazing…” Ogata says, “That’s why… I want to see all of you.” Saya spreads his legs and Ogata says, “This is bad.. I’m so excited…” Saya says, “Really? That’s great…” (in the small bubble Ogata says, “Too cute…”). So… yeah blowjob time. Saya says, “It’s dirty, don’t..!” Ogata’s like “The sounds you make are so cute.”
Sooo Saya comes on his face and apologizes. Saya says something like his house is no good, so Ogata invites him over to his place instead and holds out his key, saying “I always wanted to return this to you, it’s about time I did… I want to learn more about what Saya has been hiding. Also because I want to change jobs and start a new life. So I would be very happy if you would accept the keys to my home.” Saya yells, “I’ll accept it, I’ll accept, I super super want it!!” Ogata’s like, “Then take it, quickly take it.”
Final scene. Ogata’s working the bar at his new job. Drunk lady at the counter says, “Hey little brother [dunno what that would be in Japanese?], do people often tell you your facial muscles are dead?” Ogata replies, “Every day.” The lady’s like, "Exactly~ I come often but I’ve never seen you have any other expression~!” Ogata politely replies “I’m sorry.” The lady points and she’s like “But! I feel I’m now able to read you a little! You’re particularly anxious today!” Ogata says, “I’ve been exposed, huh.” Lady asks, “Well why? What’s the reason?” Ogata says, “Because today he’s coming to the store, the person I like.” Lady’s like, “Eh--------? What kind of person-----??” Saya walks in and Ogata’s face goes completely sappy. Lady sees that and starts chuckling. Ogata calls out, “Saya!”
The end. :)
Apologies for any mistakes. Happy holidays everyone!
2016-01-26 15:10 marked
SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 4:
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So after the whole "woah he's a dude" thing, Ogata thinks, "I clearly understand he's a man but kept trying to get close to him. I think he's cute. Because I like him, I want to touch him" and like how he likes Saya because Saya is the only one to understand him and makes him laugh and stuff. So Ogata runs into Saya and they go off to talk in private. He asks what the bartender was asking and Saya is like "He asked if you and I have a good relationship. I told him I make breakfast for you. He said he also wants to eat." Ogata looks nervous at the idea that Saya would cook for someone else. "Okay.. so are you going to do it?" Saya says he won't, then tries to pay back Ogata what he owes him: "With that it's all finished, I won't make [breakfast] anymore." He says goodbye and leaves.
Now Ogata's moping and his sister's freaked out. His mom's like "Yusuke's not eating breakfast today?" (HMM I wonder why~~). Ogata thinks, "I have to apologize to Saya, but how.." He heads over to Saya's place and asks his mom if he's home and she's like "You're Misaki's friend???" and calls for Saya to come down. "That child looks very gloomy but he's actually a good boy. Please get along with him." Ogata agrees.
They go outside. Saya says,"There were some things I wanted to say anyway." Ogata cuts him off with, "But before that, I'm so sorry. I didn't plan to do that." And then something like 'When I was touching you I was caught up/thinking more about the matter/business of it than actually touching you' and then he's like "But this doesn't change how [I feel about you;] I like you."
Saya replies, "But isn't that because I can read Yusuke? The bartender said Yusuke is expressionless so it's hard to tell what you're thinking. But I understand.... Didn't I say? Yusuke, it's fine, your reaction was normal. Besides, I am so happy that for the first time [I was] embraced/held close like that by a man and kissed. I always wanted to see what it was like. I finally achieved happiness [or "a good time"?]. Thank you." Ogata says, "So we can still be friends," and Saya's like 'Sure, I'll stop by where you are sometime, you'll never escape me~' and they part ways... but they're both sad babies and totally lying to themselves. )):
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So after the whole "woah he's a dude" thing, Ogata thinks, "I clearly understand he's a man but kept trying to get close to him. I think he's cute. Because I like him, I want to touch him" and like how he likes Saya because Saya is the only one to understand him and makes him laugh and stuff. So Ogata runs into Saya and they go off to talk in private. He asks what the bartender was asking and Saya is like "He asked if you and I have a good relationship. I told him I make breakfast for you. He said he also wants to eat." Ogata looks nervous at the idea that Saya would cook for someone else. "Okay.. so are you going to do it?" Saya says he won't, then tries to pay back Ogata what he owes him: "With that it's all finished, I won't make [breakfast] anymore." He says goodbye and leaves.
Now Ogata's moping and his sister's freaked out. His mom's like "Yusuke's not eating breakfast today?" (HMM I wonder why~~). Ogata thinks, "I have to apologize to Saya, but how.." He heads over to Saya's place and asks his mom if he's home and she's like "You're Misaki's friend???" and calls for Saya to come down. "That child looks very gloomy but he's actually a good boy. Please get along with him." Ogata agrees.
They go outside. Saya says,"There were some things I wanted to say anyway." Ogata cuts him off with, "But before that, I'm so sorry. I didn't plan to do that." And then something like 'When I was touching you I was caught up/thinking more about the matter/business of it than actually touching you' and then he's like "But this doesn't change how [I feel about you;] I like you."
Saya replies, "But isn't that because I can read Yusuke? The bartender said Yusuke is expressionless so it's hard to tell what you're thinking. But I understand.... Didn't I say? Yusuke, it's fine, your reaction was normal. Besides, I am so happy that for the first time [I was] embraced/held close like that by a man and kissed. I always wanted to see what it was like. I finally achieved happiness [or "a good time"?]. Thank you." Ogata says, "So we can still be friends," and Saya's like 'Sure, I'll stop by where you are sometime, you'll never escape me~' and they part ways... but they're both sad babies and totally lying to themselves. )):
2016-01-26 15:00 marked
2016-01-26 08:57 marked
Just commenting about the ending and the so-called "girlfriend" issue
I was actually confused about that part too but after re-reading I don't believe that Ian got himself a girlfriend. For starters, after they came back from visiting the family's house, and Jeremy's confession before Sandra's grave, he was finally able when confronted by Ian to accept being loved. Of course, Jeremy's soul and heart are still scarred, so it isn't possible for him yet to lead the life of a normal couple with Ian but the relationship hasn't ended.
[Jeremy: Can you love me even though I am a killer? Can I test your love?
Ian: That day I finally felt he was born]
http://www.mangago.zone/read-manga/zankoku_na_kami_ga_shihai_suru/mh/v17/c086/44/
Yes, this is what Ian was waiting for because this is the start of catharsis … so why would they break up? Why would he get himself a girlfriend, even months after that? Jeremy has already challenged him about the love issue, and Ian, being as steadfast and stubborn as he is, would never back up, would never fail to prove to him that he can have faith in his love. When Ian broke up with Nadia, he told her that the only way he can communicate with someone like Jeremy is through love. Throughout this difficult relationship, he was waiting for this opening either to be told that he is loved by Jeremy or that Jeremy accepts to be loved by him. He was going to lose hope and end things with him though he was reluctant about it, seeking for excuses to meet up with him again, however Jeremy finally accepted his love by saying the words I quoted before (so there won't be any other partners, lovers or else everything Ian has done up till would have beeen futile and he still has hope that this relationship will progress more … there is a hint about that in the last chapters' pages).
Some readers have suggested that Jeremy was jealous from the lady friend who was accompanying Ian so he referred to her as being his girlfriend (this is very plausible because Jeremy isn't direct with expressing his jealousy).
Finally, Ian explicitly spoke about love: during September throughout November, Jeremy alienates himself and avoids Ian because this is the period when he was entrapped by Greg, but during December, this is his “winter celebration” where he can finally monopolize and embrace Jeremy, so he is waiting for that as much as Jeremy is waiting for it, waiting for the fun (he said so explicitly), when they get lost in their imagination/ vision, overlooking the cliffs.
If Ian had a girlfriend (a companion/ a partner), if he had grown out of his feelings for Jeremy, he wouldn't have said that. It is not even a possibility because if he had, the last chapter would have completely been different so the end lies in these words “I've been waiting too the December that I can monopolize him and embrace him. That is my winter celebration”.
“How often does LOVE go back and forth between the threshold of life and death” (death: September --- November; life = December)
:)
It is a very beautiful ending (the last page about Schubert has a meaning too as Ian invited Jeremy before with a promise but I kind of forgot what is was – kissing him maybe – I am not sure)
http://www.mangago.zone/read-manga/zankoku_na_kami_ga_shihai_suru/mh/v17/c086/60/
I was actually confused about that part too but after re-reading I don't believe that Ian got himself a girlfriend. For starters, after they came back from visiting the family's house, and Jeremy's confession before Sandra's grave, he was finally able when confronted by Ian to accept being loved. Of course, Jeremy's soul and heart are still scarred, so it isn't possible for him yet to lead the life of a normal couple with Ian but the relationship hasn't ended.
[Jeremy: Can you love me even though I am a killer? Can I test your love?
Ian: That day I finally felt he was born]
http://www.mangago.zone/read-manga/zankoku_na_kami_ga_shihai_suru/mh/v17/c086/44/
Yes, this is what Ian was waiting for because this is the start of catharsis … so why would they break up? Why would he get himself a girlfriend, even months after that? Jeremy has already challenged him about the love issue, and Ian, being as steadfast and stubborn as he is, would never back up, would never fail to prove to him that he can have faith in his love. When Ian broke up with Nadia, he told her that the only way he can communicate with someone like Jeremy is through love. Throughout this difficult relationship, he was waiting for this opening either to be told that he is loved by Jeremy or that Jeremy accepts to be loved by him. He was going to lose hope and end things with him though he was reluctant about it, seeking for excuses to meet up with him again, however Jeremy finally accepted his love by saying the words I quoted before (so there won't be any other partners, lovers or else everything Ian has done up till would have beeen futile and he still has hope that this relationship will progress more … there is a hint about that in the last chapters' pages).
Some readers have suggested that Jeremy was jealous from the lady friend who was accompanying Ian so he referred to her as being his girlfriend (this is very plausible because Jeremy isn't direct with expressing his jealousy).
Finally, Ian explicitly spoke about love: during September throughout November, Jeremy alienates himself and avoids Ian because this is the period when he was entrapped by Greg, but during December, this is his “winter celebration” where he can finally monopolize and embrace Jeremy, so he is waiting for that as much as Jeremy is waiting for it, waiting for the fun (he said so explicitly), when they get lost in their imagination/ vision, overlooking the cliffs.
If Ian had a girlfriend (a companion/ a partner), if he had grown out of his feelings for Jeremy, he wouldn't have said that. It is not even a possibility because if he had, the last chapter would have completely been different so the end lies in these words “I've been waiting too the December that I can monopolize him and embrace him. That is my winter celebration”.
“How often does LOVE go back and forth between the threshold of life and death” (death: September --- November; life = December)
:)
It is a very beautiful ending (the last page about Schubert has a meaning too as Ian invited Jeremy before with a promise but I kind of forgot what is was – kissing him maybe – I am not sure)
http://www.mangago.zone/read-manga/zankoku_na_kami_ga_shihai_suru/mh/v17/c086/60/
2016-01-06 23:47 marked
The word "Heartache" is not enough.