put value on how they act not only what they say. Look at how they treat and talk about other ppl. If they respect your boundaries but also push you to be better. Someone that cant uphold the simplest virtuous will not be someone to put your trust in. The Little things paint the big picture
Seems like Wookyung cant/doesnt distinguish between violence and play because his first experience with sex was getting raped. So he misinterprets the pleasure he feels getting abused as being because of the abuse and not that pleasure is a coping mechanism form his body. He describes sex without pain as unbearable, as if he needs the pain to cope with the pleasure. So basically a trauma response