PotatoPirate's Topics (125)

If that happens, I'm gonna cry

We all will

So like her dad is Von or Ron vita or something. It’s the guy with pink hair who seems to be related with Louie her supposed younger brother?
Her real biological dad is a noble (the spness or spess family) the black hair boy (don’t know yet can be assume he is of high rank


So after her father dies(pink hair dad) she has to survive with her little brother
She is questioned by the first prince ( bastard ) and after testing one of her swords he takes her as a prisoner ( not sure why I forgot lol) anyway she is abused and after a while she meets black hair boy and they escape. She doesn’t make it far and is captured so the other boys can escape. After she is thrown back in prison her father(blond dad) finds her and takes her back
Hope it helps ( I wrote it quick sorry too lazy to rewrite )

I understand that part but when the mc met her real father and the duke met with the prince their conversations became blurry. Ofc I understand the gist of the story and what not but It was as if there is something missing in the dialogue or the author just doesn’t know how to properly phrase and phase the story. Everything seems to be escalating fast and you cant tell who’s talking or thinking of something . It’s not overly confusing to the point that you wont be able to comprehend what’s happening because it’s so random but the story isn’t clear either. I suppose the author isn’t trying to produce a linear story and is trying to give off the feeling of suspense but the presentation of the story is a little bit confusing.

That is very true, the way they respond to the situation and how the dialogue is written doesn’t really match? If that makes any sense. Anyway what I’m trying to say is that it doesn’t seem to be suspenseful in a big way just kind of like pow not boom ( I wrote that weird lol )

Yes, It was kinda confusing esp with the prince and king. I cant really distinguish who was thinking since the placement of dialogue is kinda off. Plus the way they act is different to their supposed character

Yea definitely I can’t tell if he angry with the prince for hitting his biological daughter or working with him since in the chapter he seemed very angry and was just very chill afterward? The dialogue seems just a bit off

agreed, like did he really not trust the uke THAT much where he brought in a guy that he alr knew uke was insecure of and then made him even MORE insecure and when the uke found out and was sobbing talking about how he shouldn’t have done that and he really does love him, the seme makes more… jokes?… like the seme is just sucky lol, he and others justified it because the seme was after him for a while, like ok, but the seme is still a dick

We actually had high hopes for him. He waited for the uke for years. He was willing to get used by him because he liked him and wanted to be with him. But when they finally got together he pulled that sht? I know that he’s also anxious about their relationship but why he gotta do that? And yes, when the uke cried it’s like he wasnt sorry that he did that and was somehow giving off the aura that it worked and he was thankful that he did it. Not remorseful that he made his partner anxious. Even if he did chase for the uke for years i dont think he actually has the right to play with his feelings and test him. I Was actually expecting him to be understanding because he knew the uke’s feelings, insecurities, and all that but he was the first to actually mess up with him.

i 100% like he was showing mad toxic signs when he showed no remorse for making the uke CRY? and the third party which was already someone who was and still is suspicious into the drama?? like it i were the uke id be SO upset.

It’s a major red flag :(((

honestly i would think hed treat him well after the years for chasing him at the LEAST