This is now on lezhin! Support the author! Yay Scarlet Beriko!!!
https://www.lezhin.com/en/comic/minorishand
omg! i didn't know, thanks for the info <3
try reading this manga while listening to the blcd! I really like this blcd. Bcs even the 'badump' got their own sound in that blcd (srry, u know what i mean?:')) because a simple little thing is realized on this blcd (ʘᴗʘ✿)
https://m.soundcloud.com/user-904177258/sets/minori-no-te
This story is so loaded with tropes and cliches I couldn't finish it. I was annoyed already in the first chapter, and could only make it to part-way through chapter four before I was done. Well, at least the art is nice.
(spoilers)
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It bugs me that right at the beginning of the story, novelist guy has exactly one thought about neighbor kid being underage (which he rightly ought to) and then throws that thought completely out the window and dives straight into the pervy sex stuff. This whole thing was horribly rushed, and felt really uncomfortably predatory.
I'm fine with HSer thinking he's in love with novelist. But novelist doesn't announce that he's gay when confessed to by a boy, so I'm gonna assume he wasn't gay prior to this. I don't think that's unreasonable. But then he has zero amounts of reservations about sexing a guy, doesn't ponder his sexuality at all, and doesn't have like any kind of growth about this. In a place like Japan where homosexuality is treated with a lot of derision, you can't tell me he wouldn't have thought about it AT ALL before going straight into the dick-grabbing an underage kid. (note: older manga have no qualms about middle schoolers having sex, but these days most R-18 comics tend to view sub-20-years as being underage, and you can see this in plenty of manga)
Taking HSer to the publisher meet-n-greet where he doesn't know anyone at all, and not escorting him around the whole time and not introducing him to anyone while he's there is just really crappy of novelist guy. Don't take him if you're mostly just going to ditch him and hide him. It's fine that HSer is interested in the publishing industry and I think that's good development for him, but I think it would've been better if this had been setup/foreshadowed in an earlier chapter so it wouldn't feel like it came out of nowhere for the purpose of generating drama.
The cultural festival.
When the HSer goes to hide around the side of some remote building to take a break then gets attacked by the sexpervert, I was done. Why was that guy there? Does he just hang around at schools looking to grab the dicks of cross-dressing HS boys? At a busy cultural festival in broad daylight where you would increase your chances of getting caught like a million percent (compared to jumping someone alone at night in a non-populated area). Was he following HSer around? Is every guy in this comic gay for the convenience of the author? If this was going to happen to HSer, the sexpervert should've been shown talking to HSer earlier at the cafe and following him around the cultural festival. It would still have been lame, but it would've at least been a properly set-up cliche. Also I couldn't help but think that Japanese people just aren't that forward to be randomly forcibly groping someone in a non-anonymous way in broad daylight with tons of people around just because they're horny for HSer dick. It's just a different mindset they have over there. It really breaks me out of immersion.
Also, why is novelist guy suddenly there in such a remote spot? He just appears, with no context and no set-up, so he can swoop in to save HSer in the most cliche of ways. He hadn't even been shown to have even gotten to the cafe yet at the cultural festival; why would HSer yell for someone who wasn't even there (that he knew of).
It also irked me that HSer would do absolutely nothing to defend himself. It certainly is not his fault he's being groped (** see below for a more in-depth explanation of this), but I take issue with the uke being forced to be a doormat by the author when there's no indication that his character actually acts this way. The uke has been shown a few times to be a man of action. He saved the cat. He confessed to the novelist. He picked up the cigs and carried them around on his own. He asked to go to the publisher party even though he wasn't even invited and the seme didn't want to go. This doormat behavior is incongruent with his character, and is forced upon him for the purpose of showcasing the novelist to be a valiant person in the laziest, most character-inconsistent way possible. This harkens back to an older time in the BL genre where the ukes are basically girl stand-ins from shoujo manga, and they're useless, dumb, poor, and inept, with a perfect boyfriend/love-interest who does absolutely everything for them. When even stupid Twilight features this cliche, you know you've screwed up.
Anyway, the sexpervert wasn't actually even a threat anyway beyond being slightly pushy. He didn't have a weapon. All it took was one punch from novelist guy to make him run away. And then he was completely forgotten. If you're gonna have something like this happen in a story, make him more of a threat. Have the seme actually get his ass beaten in order to defend the uke. Have the seme drag him to the cops afterwards. Have him reassure the uke that he's ok, he's loved, and etc etc. Have him actually DOOOO something substantial at all. Instead, a disgusting moment (sexual assault) is treated like a joke, with a doormat uke and a seme that teleports in and exerts barely any effort at all to get rid of something that isn't even really much of a threat. Ugh, it's soooooooooo bad.
But that isn't even the worst of it. After one-punch-man novelist gets to pop in from absolutely nowhere to gallantly save our poor damsel uke who won't even lift a finger on his own behalf, the novelist guy decides that now is a good time to sex up his uke, in broad daylight, in public, right after he'd just been groped by a sexpervert. TAKE HIM TO THE POLICE STATION TO REPORT IT, GEEZ. Why would anyone think that sex is the correct course of action to take after their partner was just assaulted one minute before?
At this point I was done. This is just too stupid and cliche even for me. My tolerance for this sort of stupidity is pretty high, but this author isn't even trying here. So I'm not going to bother either.
**As a final comment: I just want to say I do not blame the uke for getting groped. It's not his fault at all. This is more a comment on the author forcing the uke to take no action on his own behalf even though he's not been characterized like this previously in order to put him in a damsel situation in order to try and make seme look good in a lame, over-used, and problematic way. Not everyone reacts to situations like this the same. Some people get violent, some people freeze, and some people screech their heads off. It's not his fault, it's the author's fault. This is some lazy, lowest-common-denominator stuff right here.
I did not expect to read a whole essay
kskskks i fully agree w/ it though... reading this really had me pulling at my fucking hair
I enjoyed this one overall, but there were some writing issues that can't help but bug me after the fact. At least one of them could be solved in an extra chapter, if there's gonna be one.
(spoilers)
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This was set up at the beginning to be a love triangle that never materializes. It was supposed to be Aki - Hinata - Haruta, but Haruta was never in the running, and is completely forgotten about halfway through the story. Also, something felt off about introducing Aki first, if he was going to be the eventual love-interest. I feel like there should've been an air of mystery built around him, like he was at soccer camp and didn't show up for a few days while Hinata continued to wonder about him as he looked at family photos of Aki around the house while Haruta gets his claws into Hinata early (even though Haruta'll eventually lose). I don't know, it's hard to explain why this is off/doesn't-work.
Younger bro Haruta was introduced WAY too late. He's in middle school and lives there too. He should've shown up in the first chapter right at the same time Hinata first sees Aki. Maybe while Hinata is standing in the front yard "having a moment" and pushes zombified-Hinata into the house while rolling his eyes. But instead, days pass before we see hide nor hair of Haruta, with no explanation for why he hasn't been seen yet. It's not like kids that age have reasons to be gone from home for days at a time with no comment. It's REALLY WEIRD.
Also, Haruta's (aka younger bro) presence in the story was kind of a waste. It wasn't clear if he actually liked Hinata or not, or if he was just jealous of his brother. This was never cleared up. The whole "slave" thing didn't really add anything and just wasted panels, since no one ever saw this going on but the two of them. Either remove lil bro from the story or add at least a few more panels to wrap up his jealousy and whether or not he likes Hinata. Drop the "slave" angle since it adds nothing. I was actually hoping Ryu would show up at their house to study with Hinata and would find Haru treating Hinata like a slave, and Ryu lays the smack down on Haruta, causing Haruta to instantly fall in love with Ryu. But we get nothing, boo hoo.
The development of Hinata's friend "Ryu the delinquent" went nowhere. A character like Ryu's presence in a story is typically a set up for misunderstandings later, but this never happened in any respect. What this should've lead to was that 1) Aki sees Hinata with Ryu and gets completely the wrong idea, leading to his wet dream the next night, giving Aki the push he needs to decide if he likes Hinata or not, and 2) Aki or Haruta thinking that Ryu's gonna be a bad influence on Hinata because he's a delinquent complicates the situation and relationships. Again, Ryu was a setup with no pay-off.
I don't get the point of the non-con jerk-off at the beginning of the story, plus the full-frontal fresh-from-the-shower Aki later, if the story isn't going to go as far as showing Hinata and Aki having sex. Either you're gonna have smut in your comic or you're not. Leave that stuff out and just focus on almost-kisses instead, if you're not gonna show the sex. This sort of stuff (the chapt 1 jerk-off) is essentially a standard BL setup for sex later, and when the sex never happens, it ends up making the story feel incomplete.
No wrap-up for the "I'm moving out to go to college" angle. As far as I can tell, Aki is two years older than Hinata, and while the comic does acknowledge that Aki is going to college after HS, there is no discussion of what's going to happen with Aki and Hinata after Aki leaves. It's just dropped. It was mentioned as late in the story as a couple of panels before the confession at the very end, so this should've had at least a couple of panels afterwards to lay out some kind of plan for them going forward. It's just two more seasons before Aki leaves (after winter). Not to mention that Hinata is only supposed to be staying with them for a year anyway, so it should show him calling his parents and asking to stay for all of HS, or asking for his parents to pay for an apartment equidistant to Hinata's school and Aki's apartment or letting Hinata room with Aki in Aki's apartment if it's not too far from Hinata's HS.... just SOMETHING.
All this aside, it was still a pretty enjoyable read, with a lot of good comedic moments.
I'm glad I wasn't the only one who thought this was kinda incomplete. At first I really thought it was going to be one of those mangas where the main character happens to have sex with most of the characters because of how it was portrayed. I don't mind that it wasn't, I just feel like it was all for nothing. Like, he could've kissed ryu on a whim to realize then that it didn't work out because it wasn't aki or something. I highly agree on the jerk off part too, because it gave this story "not thinking too much and going straight to the action fast" vibes, which later made the ending disappointing. When they were alone at home and with their mutual attraction, something must've happened for sure.
Idk, I just hope we get some extras to make it up for most of this, because the premise of this manga was actually not bad at all. (￣ε(#￣)Σ
I was about to write something long but you have gotten the main ideas of what I have observed after reading it. The shounen vibe is so strong here and the yaoi ending would perfectly end this (perhaps a time skip) but, overall, it was a very nice thing to read with a few reservations.
The second story was kind of confusing, but I think I have a handle on who is who from the past, and who loved who.
In 1978, Daigo (the married one in present day) has short straight black hair, Masaki (the blond in present day) was the pretty boy, and Otohiko (the one who died) has the messy black fly-away hair. Otohiko was in love with Daigo (who was marrying his sis), Masaki (implied) was in love with Otohiko, and Daigo was in love with Katsuko (Otohiko's sis). Masaki was salty that Otohiko couldn't give up his love for Daigo despite Daigo getting married and kind of took it out on Otohiko. Masaki and Otohiko continued to have a sex friends sort of relationship over the years because Otohiko was just never in a good state and just didn't give a f and Masaki wanted him in some way, even if on a superficial level.
Not all of the things shown in the manga were things Masaki told Daigo while standing there in his apartment. The ones presented in flash-back format were just Masaki reminiscing to himself on the situation from back then. So while the readers know the situation because we get to see the flashbacks, Masaki only provides Daigo with some vague context to clue him in on the situation (saying that Otohiko was doing it for money and that Masaki took him up on the offer).
In the end, Masaki requests Otohiko's ashes (because he loved Otohiko), and Daigo kind of understood it on some level after their conversation, and so acquiesced, giving them up without comment.
I looked on cmoa and amazon.co.jp and it appears there's one full volume for this, 187 pages. So I'd expect this to be about 6 chapters and done. Hopefully someone will finish this one up relatively soon.
The author has another comic out released this year with 3 chapters already called "Baby Pink Complex" that hasn't been picked up by anyone that I can tell. Chapter 3 was released June 1st 2020. That one looks delish; I hope we see it get picked up soon.
From what I know the group is still working on it. It's in their project list. Maybe they need people to help that's why it takes time to finish.
The characters' dynamic was so entertaining that it was a little bit ruined for me when they stared arguing about who gets to top. I mean, arguing was kinda their dynamic so it's a bit forgivable here, but it's still such a tired and unlikable trope in a story that's otherwise pretty good. Can it really be called love if the a person won't even consider doing for their partner what their partner does for them? Not only that, but also looking upon the role with disdain while simultaneously taking advantage of their partner agreeing to be in that role in the first place?
Also I feel like Tsukamoto went from straight to gay at light speed with no real on-screen transition or conscious decision or other reasonable explanation. Japan ain't that progressive, so he'd have reservations about it most likely. And loving an author's works is not the same as being in love with that author. Also, when Tsukamoto calls Itsuki a virgin, it's implied that Tsukamoto is "not a virgin", and since Tsukamoto didn't announce mentally that he was gay, it was probably with girls. Also, both of the dorks were in love with the pet store girl at the beginning of the story.
Meanwhile for Itsuki, it was fine, since before the pet store girl, he either admired or loved (the distinction is kind of blurry as written) chief editor, which means he was likely bi (if inexperienced).
Anyway, I'd be interested to know a little more about chief editor and/or read a spin-off story about him.
This comic has such interesting characters and such a great setup, especially regarding the character interactions, that it's a shame the ending was so rushed. Also, much of the connective tissue of the story is missing, which makes the latter half of the story come apart at the seams by the end.
It cometh forth, and what much complaining shall be had presents forthwith a lengthy diatribe, beyond which any sane individual shall care to peruse.
(spoilers)
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First off, the title. The primary plot of this story is piano/music school stuff, which should be reflected in the title, but isn't. Rename this to something like "Piano Complex" or "Body in G Major".
The relationship situation is a convoluted mess by the end.
Whether or not Jaehyun still loves Minwoo is a really important factor in how the relationships will turn out, yet is never clarified. Jaehyun says a few times that he used to love Minwoo, implying he doesn't anymore, but his actions indicate he still has feelings for Minwoo. It is not unthinkable for a character in a comic like this to lie to himself in the text of the story, but usually they admit they have done so on-screen by the end of the story, if this is the case. But this never happens. The audience needs some clarity on this point so that they can feel really satisfied and secure with the posture Jaehyun and Seojin are in with each other at the end of the story.
Minwoo loving or not loving Jaehyun is never clarified. This is a big factor for whether Jaehyun will try to repair his relationship with Minwoo or instead choose Seojin at the end, since we're not sure if Jaehyun really has given up on Minwoo yet or not. We see eventually Minwoo getting obsessive over Jaehyun but it's never shown whether that's because Minwoo "loves" Jaehyun or because he had a toy taken away from him. And please note that Jaehyun had the perfect storm of ideal attributes for Minwoo: good looking, super horny, willing to put up with his BDSM insanity, and forcibly dependent on him due to no family or job or skills. It would be very hard for Minwoo to replace Jaehyun and tick all these boxes with a new person, so it's not unreasonable to think he could just be pissed that his toy was taken away.
Something needs to be done to obviate the "stockholm-y" nature of Seojin's "love" for Jaehyun. Seojin was all gung-ho on using Jaehyun to exact revenge on Minwoo early on, and then after Jaehyun forces Seojin to have sex with him against his desires, he suddenly decides he loves Jaehyun. This is really risky territory to base a love story on.
The relationship-stuff setup at the beginning reached the wrong conclusion at the end. Early in the story, Jaehyun was going to get revenge on Minwoo by "using" Seojin. The wrap-up for this should've been that Jaehyun gets revenge on both Minwoo for ruining his life and Seojin for having the gall to try and use Jaehyun to take Minwoo down. But this would mean that Jaehyun ends up single, which we can't have in an R19 BL, so we have to force them into a relationship that hasn't been built up properly. If the author really wants this relationship to happen with this particular set-up, then the author needs to show in the text of the comic that Jaehyun has transitioned from wanting to "use" Seojin to enact some kind of revenge on Minwoo to Jaehyun unambiguously loving Seojin, and letting go of the revenge plan. Because this never happens, the whole relationship with Seojin feels forced by the end.
The side characters need to be evaluated for role and purpose in the story.
The chairwoman should be removed from the story completely. The chairwoman's convenience marriage to Minwoo doesn't add anything to the story. He would be in just as much trouble if caught having a sex affair with a student whether or not he was married. Seojin and spurned-TA could've been seeking revenge with or without the chairwoman's interference. Nothing that the chairwoman did to Minwoo couldn't've been done by spurned-TA with a little ingenuity on her part. Finding Jaehyun at the end after he went missing could've happened any number of ways without her help. Seojin didn't need to get sponsorship from chairwoman when his mother died; he could've just inherited whatever small amount of wealth she'd managed to accumulate before she died. The changing of the program could've been forced by spurned-TA threatening Minwoo with making their relationship public, and she could've done it to force Minwoo to be center-stage when Jaehyun embarrasses himself playing the piano like a clod.
The spurned-TA should've just been the virtuoso pianist in Jaehyun's major/department who was angry that Minwoo was showing Jaehyun favoritism when he's a foul-mouthed, lazy, slack-ass who may or may not actually be good at playing the piano. This is much better motivation for her than a cheap "spurned women's club" trope.
Why was there any need for the chairwoman to "bring Minwoo down", anyway? He's just a professor at a college. Was he a bad teacher? Was he bad at the piano? Was she pissed that they had a convenience marriage and she wanted (a real one with him) or (out of it)? Was she mad that he was screwing one of his students (even though she might have been doing the same thing?)? Was she exacting revenge on behalf of his spurned-TA (who may or may not be her lover)? The dumb part is that what she ended up doing caused the exact opposite of what a chairperson of a school would want: a scandal, that would likely impact enrollment, which impacts the bottom line (money), which is Bad (tm) for people who get paid based on the school's success. Also, it was way too obvious that it was arranged by the chairwoman ("the chairwoman changed the program at the last minute!"), so if Minwoo decides he wants revenge for this, he already knows exactly who to target! Just drop this whole chairwoman angle and just make it solely the revenge of the spurned TA.
Well, at least Seojin's motivations for bringing Minwoo down were clear.
Moving on to piano-related plot issues.
It's stated in various places that Jaehyun loves the piano, but we never really see this. Jaehyun is never shown practicing. He says at the end that he's been busting his ass training for the duet with Minwoo, but we can't feel good about it because we never see any practicing happening. It would be better to see him practice, see his hand shake, ruining what he was doing, and getting increasingly frustrated with it over the course of the comic. This would also make the ending have A LOT more impact.
The piano plot is setup well but is never paid off. Jaehyun nagged Minwoo over and over early in the story to assign the duet at the concert to the two of them (Minwoo and Jaehyun). So, after the program gets forcibly changed against Minwoo's will, Jaehyun should've actually played the duet with Minwoo at the concert before the big scandal reveal. Not only this, but Jaehyun should've been so amazing that he completely blows Minwoo out of the water and floors both the audience and Seojin as they look on. It should take a lot out of him to keep his hand from shaking during this duet, to tie this back in with the main plot. Jaehyun really needed a moment to shine, to prove he was more than just a useless pretty face. That he was actually amazing and that everyone running their mouths were just jealous. But we never got this, and we're left with a feeling of incompleteness.
Truck-kun rears its ugly head when this should've been a pivotal plot choice. The hospitalization should've been caused by the direct actions of Minwoo choosing to do something awful to Jaehyun rather than a cheap-ass truck-kun moment. This is what everything had built to, and this was the turning point where Jaehyun was supposed to choose to take the downfall to protect Seojin, which meant he was effectively choosing Seojin over Minwoo. But no, we get truck-kun, and thus continued ambiguity about what Jaehyun really wants.
Germany is rife with problems.
Germany issue #1. Is the purpose of Minwoo sending Jaehyun to Germany to provide classical piano training to Jaehyun? If this is true, state it! This is never specifically stated anywhere in the comic.
Germany issue #2. Can Jaehyun realistically get classical training in Germany with his hand the way it is? Seems like no, but we're never given enough info about whether or not Jaehyun likes the piano, or is even that good at playing it before or after his hand was messed-up. One would rightfully assume some minimum level of desire and competence is required before a person gets this sort of training, but who knows if Jaehyun meets that bar. Which leads right into the next issue...
Germany issue #3. Is Jaehyun's "dream" really to go to Germany, or does he just want to get away from Minwoo, or does he just want classical piano training? This also is never clarified. Germany can't be the only place in the world to get classical piano training. So why not instead say it's Seojin's dream to get "classical piano training" rather than "go to Germany"? Meanwhile, Seojin just assumes going to Germany is Jaehyun's "dream" (as if Jaehyun thinks it's a neat place to visit/live), but he doesn't know that, and Jaehyun never confirms or denies this any of the times Seojin mentions it. I always just figured that before his injury, Jaehyun really wanted to go (for the purpose of training), but after the injury, it became more of a barb used to troll Minwoo while doubling as a convenient way to escape Minwoo if he ever managed to get Minwoo to send him.
Germany issue #4. Why was Minwoo "sent to Germany" at the end of the story? First off, he's just a college professor who had a sex scandal, not a disgruntled government employee selling state secrets. Why does he have to be expelled from the country? This is never explained. Does the chairwoman even have the power to force this on him? Just fire him. He can get a job somewhere else, at a different school in Korea.
Germany issue #5. If Minwoo is "sent to Germany" by the chairwoman, it is entirely possible that if Jaehyun and Seojin go later, they'll run in to him, causing everyone problems all over again. The characters even point this out. This whole obsession with unexplained/unmotivated international travel doesn't make any sense at all and actively breaks the ending of the story in many ways.
This story is missing a climax. It can be pieced together from the above, but here's a quick summary of what needed to happen that didn't: Jaehyun plays his duet with Minwoo and kicks ass, shocking everyone, then immediately after in the heat of the moment chooses to take the fall for Seojin (the accident or something like it), simultaneously showing that he does actually love Seojin and that he has finally made his choice to accept Seojin and reject Minwoo.
tl;dr -- The author let the story run away with her at the end, leaving necessary character motivations unexplored/unexplained, plot threads dangling, and turning the ending into a rushed, unsatisfying mess.
The pace moved briskly at the beginning of the comic, and I really thought we'd get to the exhibition somewhere in the 30s chapter-wise... how wrong I was. Here it is ch74 and the photo exhibition STILL hasn't happened yet.
Haesoo and Joowon are adults now, I'm not sure how their relationship with each other has anything to do with the two parents and their relationship. I mean it'd make Thanksgiving awkward, sure. But you can't force your kids to do what you want, not even when they're kids really, muchless adults as they are now. Good luck pissing into the wind.
Also, I still stand by my claim that all of this mess is Joowon's fault. He told Haesoo back then not to fall in love with him. Because Haesoo did anyway (as if one can help it), he's been keeping Joowon at arm's length, trying to get him to leave him permanently so he can get over Joowon. Meanwhile, Joowon has apparently forgotten what he'd told Haesoo back then and keeps losing his cool when Haesoo doesn't do what he wants. And Joowon's behavior toward Haesoo early in the comic was atrocious, always forcing his way into Haesoo's apartment and doing sex things he doesn't like or want. I mean, I empathize with their predicament, but Joowon needs to do some growing up before he can really stand next to Haesoo.
I feel bad for Haesoo. His mom's mad at him for getting sexually assaulted as a kid, his step-dad doesn't like him because he "seduced" his son, Joowon wants to f!ck Haesoo into oblivion but won't give him his heart (or has been sending him mixed signals for years), Taku is a bit inscrutable and it's really difficult to tell if he's being genuine or just screwing around, fans keep slut-shaming him for having an active sex-life when he wasn't dating anyone... Haesoo's being jerked around by everyone and can't catch a break. (〜￣△￣)〜
I can't believe it's already chapter 74... is this really going to be longer than BJ Alex? ~_~
Amen sis/bro!
I also think this is all messed up BC of Joowon. He is obviously in love with Haesoo and has been for a while, but in this pretend game they’ve been playing, neither confessed and they just grow apart.
I don’t really know if Taku is the one for Heasoo, but I don’t think he should end up with Joowon. Joowon obviously can’t choose between everything that’s going on, and is too childish as to abandon his job now that he might loose Haesoo.
Also the parents. I understand the taboo in the society, but they aren’t brothers so
reminder: i dont like joowon either, but.. Joowon is already having his growth. It's not all Joowon's fault and Haesoo provoked him on purpose to make him jealous (Haesoo's toxic behaivor). I dont think Joowon has ever done something sexual to Haesoo that he didn't like bc Haesoo & Joowon have always prefered their sex to be rather rough, although Joowon has definitely crossed a few lines.
And i think you're missing the point that Joowon told Haesoo not to fall in love with him, because he wanted to protect their relationship, not because he wanted to hurt Haesoo or "send him mixed signal". He still hurt him though so now he's gotta live with the consequences.
Anyways, I feel more sorry for Haesoo too, but he is not all that innocent.
You are completely missing the context. Joowon said these words after being caught by Haesoo's mother. Looking as if he wanted to cry. He thought he was protecting Haesoo and their family with them. Which was of course very naive in the end.
Totally agree. Not sure about Taku's part tbh.
the 'dont fall for me' argument has always been a weak one to me although it happened and obviously hurt haesoo and it's not like they were little kids, they were teens.
personally i disagree w/ the taku part but I see why some people think that way.
sorry but why exactly did you have to reply to me anyway?? I was justifying Joowon lmao
This author has such great art, it's a shame how much she really needs (needed) a writer to help her, or something. Finder suffers from this problem too, except its a million chapters longer which makes its issues much more glaring. This is basically the manga equivalent of eating a pint of ice cream for dinner (and Finder, a gallon).
It amazes me what old BL managed to get made into anime back in the day. They should've put more effort into the Sex Pistols anime rather than even bother animating this one. This is just schlock.
Anyway, don't read the rest of this, because it's just me complaining about nearly everything but the art.
(spoilers)
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This is such a trashy plot with a hella annoying main character. I feel like the only reason this was ever popular was that the art (and smut) is really great.
Problems with the main character, Ranmaru:
- stated to be a badass but he's constantly damseled and rescued by his boyfriend
- is a total tsundere, a brat, and an idiot, none of which are appealing traits (to me)
- he yells at random people who just ask him questions, or are simply trying to communicate with him, which is inappropriate behavior whether or not you're in a foreign country where you don't speak the language
- he's an adult (20+?) but acts like grade schooler in terms of sexual naivety
- note: wafuku is traditional japanese dress, and hinagishi-style is basically a wafuku no-pants party
- he wears the wafuku hinagishi-style instead of normal clothes even when trying to sneak around without his yakuza escort, which makes him easily identifiable to anyone looking for him
- running around in basically a shirt and underwear in a foreign country where he doesn't speak the language, with nothing else on him. he basically just has some clothes, no phone, no id, no keys, no pager, no money, no nothing, wtf
- even though they knew each other for 20 years, Ranmaru and Kaoru never had one conversation beforehand about how they would deal with a marriage neither of them wanted? ugh
Pretty much every scenario in this was completely implausible wacky yaoiland insanity that you can only shake your head at:
- getting left behind at the winery without anyone noticing. use the winery phone. also, there were cellphones in the aughts. i would think yakuza would be rich enough to afford them. or pagers if you want to be old-school.
- the whole standing on the balcony and yelling at people and then falling is just so grade-schooler and yet another damsel moment
- running into your main rival yakuza group in the same foreign country in the same hotel at the same time. this could've made sense if the rival group had planned it, but Goudou was just like "eh we do business here too", wat.
- random italian dudes driving around the countryside who suddenly decide they are interested in boning some random asian guy they come across because he's cute and ain't got no pants on
- ranmaru getting kidnapped in the street just because he chose not to confront Al at the bar, and then he blames himself for choosing not to go be in the protection sphere of the man he refuses to admit he wants to ride the D of, ugh
- why would you take pills from kidnappers (or random strangers at best) when you wake up feeling like crap in a place you don't recognize? why would you believe anything they say? ugh
- how convenient that the women who were paying off their debt by kidnapping ranmaru (or just any hot japanese guy?) knew specifically where he (or a hot japanese guy by himself in rome) was at the time when they needed to kidnap him. why bother going through that bs and instead just put him in a car at gunpoint. he doesn't even have pants on muchless a gun or a knife.
- every dude in italy seems to want to spend a night up Ranmaru's yaoi hole but not Kaoru's sexhole? this is so ridiculously implausible that it's almost offensive.
- there was no indication that ranmaru was gay, yet Al pushed him into gay adulterous sex on his wedding night wtf. not wanting to get married, or marry a specific woman is not the same as being gay.
- one chapter implies he was sexually assaulted as a kid by another guy but it doesn't mean he's gay
- nowhere in this manga does ranmaru really ponder his sexuality in any way. did this stuff never happen in japan, where every guy on the streets of tokyo who sees ranmaru wants to do a prostrate exam on him with their dick?
- how convenient that the hot italian guy knows japanese and has a dad obsessed with japanese culture so that he can communicate with ranmaru. i'm glad the dad showed up later and tried to molest ranmaru as well so we could watch another damsel moment where Al swoops in to defend the sanctity of his boyfriend's poopchute yet again.
- Al seems to just lust after Ranmaru in some kind of a fetishistic way; he doesn't even know the guy at first beyond him being a good-looking if annoying brat with no pants on who is a passenger on his cruise ship
- Ranmaru deciding he loves Al was hella rushed, and was only supported at all by forced sex/stockholm syndrome and Al rescuing ranmaru constantly to ensure that yaoi hole remained his and his alone
- it just generally would've been better if ranmaru had also been completely spellbound by Al the first moment he met him and then at least we could say they both had love at first sight or whatever. this would've been better than Al's fetish-at-first-sight and Ranmaru's ok-well-at-least-you're-not-kaoru.
There were also other issues:
- Al was a pretty generic tall/older/powerful/rich/super hot seme/top stereotype
- the mythical yakuza organizations here are corny rather than feeling at all dangerous. why bother having a yakuza plot if you're not going to have a dark/dangerous tone. just make him rich kid from an old-money family instead
- seriously, why did Al's pervert dad have to show up? just to tease an old-man sex kink scene that never materializes?
- why is ranmaru wearing female garb at the wedding instead of two guys in menswear (Al in a tux and Ranmaru in a formal male kimono)? Ranmaru as an uke/bottom does not make him a woman, and Ranmaru constantly rails about the fact that he's not a woman all throughout the manga.
- I don't want to harp on this too much this since someone went to the trouble of scanlating this, but too many words were in romaji with t/n instead of translating them when there's obvious english equivalents. For example at one point "hanao" is in romaji and then they had to put a translation note, when they could've just translated it in the dialogue as "sandal strap". or even just said "my sandal broke" and leave it at that.
- Also the t/n for "hinagishi" was inadequate given how much it's used in the dialogue. ITS A SLOB LIKE RANMARU BEING TOO LAZY TO PUT PANTS ON WITH HIS KIMONO. I guess he's gotta show off those sexy thighs so that all of gay italy can come sniffing around his yaoi hole inside his underwear that looks like a thong-diaper. :)
tl;dr -- Ranmaru is a hot annoying idiot, everything that happens is implausible or stupid, dumb cornball yakuza organizations, no paaaaaaants. The end.
I wrote this topic with no pants.
I think I had more fun reading this one comment then the whole story itself..
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Maybe if, it was like this...
Al and Ranmaru meet on the ship, Ranmaru marries Kaoru because they settle things as married only on outside.
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Al and Ranmaru fight constantly about their different cultures and die in orgies.
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Kaoru falls in love with a beautiful American women. Gets married to her in church, both wearing white gowns.
Living happily every after.
Thanks.... (▰˘◡˘▰)
Just as long as he doesn't have pants. ლ(´ڡ`ლ)
(´∀｀)／
I was so excited to read this, as authors seem to struggle to write good, compelling stories in the omegaverse, and this one was rated well. But man, there are so many issues here...
(spoilers)
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First off, no 2 conspires with a customer to rape no 1 one, which is like extra bad compared to just the typical stockholm-syndrome rape-to-love stories that happen on a whim/spur-of-the-moment. There is no reason for no 1 to like no 2, especially after what he did. No 1 is allowed to not want to get violated.
One of my most hated tropes appears here in spades -- the two leads arguing about who gets to top, and the role of the bottom being treated like some kind of lesser role. Because it's the "woman's" role.
You can tell this what they're thinking because now there's apparently ass-hymen. The freaking retarded omega being able to tell that no 1 was not an ass-virgin just by looking or sticking a finger in? Come on. Ugh.
When no 2 rapes no 1, it's considered okay because no 2 "loves" no 1. Later, when omega customer attempts to rape no 1, it's considered not-ok because said omega hates no 1 because no 1's an alpha? I guess? Mmmm hmmm. Okayyyy.
Omega also treats the role of the bottom as lesser, saying he's going to shame no 1 by butt raping him. Can we please get over this idea that the bottom is somehow a lesser role?
No 2 doesn't really seem to care that much about someone he claims to "love" when, even by the end of the story, no 1 continues to say that he wants to top, and no 2 continues to refuse him and doesn't even consider accommodating him. Such a wonderful guy.
It was set up that no 1 was a nice guy, and seemingly nicer than the other alphas at the host club at the beginning of the story, but it is not explained that this is an unusual point of view until later, when it's too late to provide backstory context on why he's this way. This is a problem, because when no 1 busts out his "purity of heart" finishing move on the omega by acting all protective of the omega after the omega is about to violate him, it just falls flat because this "pure of heart" crap is so overused in shoujo that people have been sick of it for decades. To have a character with a personality like this in your story nowadays, you have to put in some work explaining why this character is this way, what makes them more pure of heart than others, and show them suffering hardships to maintain this purity ideal. This, of course, was never done in this comic.
Moving along.
Omegas, a typically disadvantaged class in omegaverse settings, being used as the bad guy is pretty low/cheap. Especially with absolutely no set-up for this character or for why he would be so particularly salty compared to other omegas. I'd find it more reasonable that an omega this inexplicably wealthy would relish in having alphas wait on him hand and foot, and would be swimming in elite alpha ass or dick, rather than trying to exact some retarded-ass revenge plot with all of the fortune and prestige he busted his ass gaining. If you're gonna give a rich person a poor person's motivation, you have to explain it to where it makes sense why this is all happening (but no explaining happened here, though).
Speaking of, the omega's retarded-ass revenge plot would only hurt himself. An alpha who bites an omega is under no specific obligation besides moral to have anything to do with the omega he bit. Meanwhile, a bitten omega is compelled by physiology to only have sex with his bonded alpha. All this means that if no 1 bit the omega, no 1 could just go off and screw around however he wants, while the omega would be stuck in a sexless life due to physiological restrictions of the bite bond. What a dumb plan. But ofc this manga tosses in some bs one-off line about "canceling" the bond when the author realizes too late that her bad guy had an idiotic plan. So much for tension.
Also, if you're gonna go with anything different than the standard set of omegaverse setting details in your story, then you have to explain the difference. Here, omegas seem to be both rich and disadvantaged, and no effort is made to clarify what is going on with this. It's important to understand the social dynamics of a setting if you're gonna be writing a character-oriented "romance" story in it.
Also, the end where the omega is trying to rape no 1, and no 2 breaks the door open because he's such a alpha's alpha! And no 1 being all, "I'm staying to help you, mr omega, even though you're trying to hurt me because I'm so great and nice and wonderful," and the omega being moved by this.... wow this whole sequence was so cringy and masturbatory that it grosses me out just typing this summary of it.
And of course, as with most omegaverse stories I rag on, this one didn't need to be set in the omegaverse. The whole "canceling" of the bond thing that they discuss in a one-off line makes the whole threat of the bond irrelevant, plus the omega getting his plan completely backwards without realizing it, just makes the whole alpha/omega dynamic pointless. This could just as easily be two hosts competing to be top of the host club roster, and one rich guy/customer pissed at hosts because they're a leech on society, or mommy issues, or rival territory clubs, etc. Don't write omegaverse if you're not going to tell a story that could only be told in omegaverse. This should be chiseled into a monolith somewhere.
Go read Shounen no Kyoukai instead; an omegaverse story that's a billion times better.
i just wanted to say that i spent the past hour reading Shounen no Kyoukai and you really can't compare a wholesome more dramatic manga to a light hearted smutty manga. Honestly this manga was meant for the smut and although Shounen no Kyoukai had very nice smut scenes, their purpose was not to be "smut" it was to portray a sort of realism. It's the simple fact that this story could only be told in an omegaverse because of the confrontation with the omega in heat who has a "grudge" against all alphas, how would that be valid in a real world setting? it wouldn't. Just because it didn't fit into your standards of "omegaverse" doesn't mean it doesn't qualify as a story based in an omegaverse. what makes omegaverse mangas so great is because although there are general rules like "alpha=superior, omega=bottom of the chain, beta=normal people" every story is different and every authors interpretation of an omegaverse is different, some are more extreme while others are literally just for the intense feelings of heat.
My point is that it didn't use the things unique to omegaverse to tell its story (and also excused some of the normal limitations of the omegaverse like the bite-bond), which is why it didn't need to be set in omegaverse. People can have grudges in the real world for any number of reasons. Many other stories make use of aphrodisiacs (the efficacy of which is always questionable, but can be overlooked). And while this particular story can still be set in omegaverse, imma just be over here judging the author on bad writing or going for a cheap audience-grab rather than putting in the effort to write something more omegaversey or just setting it in the real world. A pretty-decent example of a grudge story off the top of my head is "Tsukiatte Agete mo Ii n Dakara ne".
Also, since are both are omegaverse stories, so they can be compared (Shounen no Kyoukai). It's really just the tragedy of what this story could've been. Every story starts out as some singularity of inspiration, and it's up to the author to grow that seed into something interesting/compelling. The fact of the matter is that this one failed, in my estimation, whereas Shounen no Kyoukai excelled. "Sayonara Alpha" is another example of a good omegaverse story that couldn't exist outside the setting.
Also, it's worth reiterating here for no particular reason that smut is no excuse for bad writing. If all people want to look at is boning, they'd be on PH instead of here. There is well-written BL smut out there. This story needs work. I recommend "Window to Window", "BJ Alex", "Playtime with Hakdo" for normal setting. I recommend omegaverse silly smut "Obaka na Omega wo Haramasetai" with a decent story, and omegaverse dramatic smut "2ban-me no Alpha" with a decent story.
Anyway, peeps can feel free to like this story, flaws and all. Even the best stories, including my favorites, aren't perfect (I have some changes for you too, BJ Alex, even though you are a great story as you are). Please do not feel that I am criticizing your taste; I just wish every story could be its best self, and all that.
"Kokoro o Korosu Houhou" (added without comment) (づ￣ ³￣)づ
'should be chiseled on a monolith somewhere' DAYUMMMMMM
I agree with most of what you said except I considered the a x a sex to be more dub con than rape bc the customer's always right theme, not sure why he agreed to sex after that though. I was annoyed that the couple didn't at least do seke, that would've redeemed this manga a little. Why is being the receiving end disgraceful? Idk. You'd think men would fight for the spot because the bottom can just enjoy everything while the top has to do all the heavy work. Men are selfish af in bed unless they love you but if not, they come first you come maybe.