Please forgive me for this is not a question related to mangas and it’s kinda personal but I am also curious if it happens to anyone else. So does anyone going through the “time of the month” get these awful cramps in the front but also at the back? I’ve asked about this to my friends and they all said that they’ve never felt something like that
Greetings fellow weebs!! So Is there anyone like me who wants to run the fuck away from home cause it's an absolute shithole which is full of people who only care about themselves? I am originally from India but I live in another country cause you know how it is Indians migrating to another yadda yadda and life was good if not great. We were a happy new family considering the fact that my brother was only a toddler and I was a baby. We were happy but then my parents had moved back to India and we lived there for the next 4 years. My dad got another job in the same country we had migrated previously and once everything settled he arranged for us to move back as well. Everything was the way it used to be in the past but our relationship kinda started getting strained(especially with my brother and my parents) and so for the next 6 years life turned into an absolute mess there was not a single week without a quarrel between parents or my brother and my parents. Then my parents decided to send my brother back to India after his freshman year cause he was getting out of control. Life once became kinda peaceful again once they sent him but it didn't take long until my Wonderful parents instead of cooperating with one another started to fight again for the silliest of things, in fact the arguments were so freaking pointless that they'd make you laugh but they would often take a violent turn for them. The two of them have never been on the same page with anything other than politics and the amount of distrust and suspicions and hostility they have against each other is just insane to the point that sometimes I've even considered calling the cops to stop them from fighting cuz I thought they would actually end one another sooner or later but seeing how used to cry so much about it, they now try to keep it under control (physically) but the verbal abuse is strong af. I currently have exams going on and I can't even fucking focus cuz the two of them just won't shut up. I hate it and I just feel like running away from home but I can't cuz I am still underage and I am just waiting to graduate high school and get out of this shithole cuz I don't know how long I'll be able to retain my sanity. This has damaged me enough to make me cry at least once a month but they don't know that and no matter how many times I tell them that their conflicts affect me mentally they never understand. Everytime I am alone with my dad, he is constantly complaining about my mom and the same fucking thing time and I have that hurts me cuz she's my mom and my mom is always calling my dad awful and vulgar names like ugh I really can't take it and I sometimes feel like I can't breath. I've even had a panic attack at school once because of them and I told them about it but I never told that it was because it's useless and even if they understand, they'll never work things between themselves cuz trust me I've tried many times and I've failed. Quite frankly our family is completely broken and we barely even talk more that 50 words a day. I sometimes wish they should just get a divorce and end it but I also don't want that cuz I feel happy when I see them get along if not all the time. As I said I needed to vent so sorry that this turned out to be really long. If y'all have your stories so that I can relate and then cry and move on with my day. Also apologies for any typos since English is my second language.
My my way to many typos lol so when I said that "I never told them" and then it just jumps to "it's useless", I meant that I never told them that it was because of what was happening at home between them that induced my panic attack. And also after "y'all have your stories"I forgot to type "please do share them with me".
I had a similar situation with my family in high school. My parents argued all the time and it would make me both so angry and so sad. Sometimes the source of arguments were just so petty and stupid. I was in my senior year and just waiting until I could get away from the whole thing by going to a college that is out of state. It got worse near the end since my dad (who was already an alcoholic tbh, but an alcoholic with a job) just stopped going to his work and started coming up with all sorts of shitty excuses and lying so that everyone would just leave him alone like a child. It just pissed me off so much. My mom basically had to care for a third 'child'. When my dad's parents would try to help him, he would just yell at them and shit. Thankfully there wasn't any physical abuse, but as I neared the end of high school the verbal abuse got worse. It might not seem like much to other people, but my parents were always great people, especially my dad, so it was hurtful to hear things like "you stupid bitch". And when confronted with the fact that he didn't have a job and how my mom was paying for everything, he just went full denial and got angry and brought up examples where we don't love him blah blah blah.
Anyway, things are a lot better now. It's been almost 2 years and I'm close to finishing my sophomore year in college. My dad has tried to clean his act up but he just relapses and has pulled the same shit for two more jobs. Now that I'm not a minor and my mom is finally getting a divorce and its so refreshing. I don't hate my dad but he just needs to get his shit together and a divorce will free my mom and hopefully give him a wakeup call.
I've never had any panic attacks or such from the things that happened, but I get huge surges of anxiety and want to cry when people get aggressive and yell at me. Especially when they blow up over little things. I get so uncomfortable when I have to deal confrontations and probably have some minor form of social anxiety lets be real.
So that's sort of my story? I don't know if this helps since everyone says this all the time, but I swear it gets better. Some people are not meant to be together for such long periods of time. People change so it's not surprising to me that some don't get along even though they used to be close before. I'm really happy my mom is going through the divorce. She's started focusing on her own happiness since all the children are out of the house and it makes me so glad to see her going after things she wants to do and not just things she needs to do. She used to be so high strung in my memories and would be set off by things we did or said when we were still together, but now she's mellowed out and even has told me she has a lot less anxiety as well.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am really glad that things are getting better for you and your mom. I just really wish that things get better here too but oh well for now I just wanna graduate high school and be free of the tense environment I feel at home.
Moving away from the situation definitely will help and I really hope things turn for the better for you!
Thank you! I really appreciate it!