Nujkkah's Things

the answers arrived too late...

pls help

Recently, I’ve been feeling so depressed because my partner died by suicide. It’s been seven months, and I still haven’t moved on. I’m still grieving, but it’s gotten so bad that I’ve gone back to my old coping habit—sleeping around. It’s the only thing that takes my mind off them, even for a little while. Honestly, I’ve even started hoping I catch something fatal so I can die naturally, because I’m too scared to do it myself.

I ran into some of my partner’s old 'friends' recently, and seeing them happy just made me so mad. These are the people who pushed my partner over the edge. I want to scream at them, call them out, and tell everyone what they did, but I can’t. They’d just make fun of me for it. That’s the kind of people they are—always tearing someone down, ruining their mental health, and they don't give a single damn.

i want to desperately talk to someone but i cant so i resort to sh again but i was too much of a coward to actually cut myself and i thought what if had sex with random people again cause im single and my bf is dead anyways so i gotta move on and i find myself today dressing up to go to a bar trying to have a one night stand. i cant even bother to be worried about STDs right now.